11/21
Short note, I'm going to the airport at a very unseemly hour of the morning.
I am not happy about being up before the rosy fingered dawn. I am not happy
about arising before Phoebus drags his chariot across the winter's sky. Getting
up before sunlight is not good. "Where does it go from here?" [Haircut
One Hundred, c., 1982] And this is why I rarely, if ever, take someone with
me on my meandering walk in the afternoon: yesterday, I was going to head over
to the East side for a quick Austin fix before I left town, but the weather
was nice, and I changed my mind and struck out for Cong Ly, up on Sixth Street,
only to be put off at the thought of actually going 'downtown' so I ended up
at Avenue Cafe, and some really tasty Barbacoa. If you don't know, then don't
ask. It's basically cow face, cooked up right. Always makes the vegetarians
squeamish, which, of course, only makes the dish taste that much better. Then,
as I was heading back up Congress, I stopped by the little convenience store,
just east of Shady Acres, and I ran into the guy with no legs, as he was wheeling
himself up to the bus stop. I offered to help him get to the bus stop, just
a hundred meters or so away, and started to give him a little shove, finding
him lighter than most wheel chairs. "Got to be careful man, I tip over
easy, you know, I don't have any legs out front." Eddie was on his way
to the Salvation Army, and I got the impression I made his trip a little easier.
But I was also badly shaken by the experience. I was traversing ground I'm used
to covering, going to the beer store, ducking behind the convenience store,
across the hotel parking lot, you know, places I've been hundreds of times.
I had to angle around the curbs, and pushing the wheel chair wasn't too easy
— the navigation part. I parked him under the bus stop sign, and turned
up Congress again. He was so happy, and he wished me a happy holiday, asked
about family and stuff, carrying on even though he's one of the people who has
fallen through the cracks. Crawling out of bed was a lot different. My legs
may creak, the right knee ain't what it used to be, but I've got legs. It really
rattled me last night.
As I was heading back up Congress towards class, I stopped by the little convenience
store, just east of Shady Acres, and I ran into the guy with no legs, as he
was wheeling himself up to the bus stop. I offered to help him get to the bus
stop, just a hundred meters or so away, and started to give him a little shove,
finding him lighter than most wheel chairs. "Got to be careful man, I tip
over easy, you know, I don't have any legs out front." Eddie was on his
way to the Salvation Army, and I got the impression I made his trip a little
easier. But I was also badly shaken by the experience. I was traversing ground
I'm used to covering, going to the beer store, ducking behind the convenience
store, across the hotel parking lot, you know, places I've been hundreds of
times. I had to angle around the curbs, and pushing the wheel chair wasn't too
easy — the navigation part. I parked him under the bus stop sign, and turned
up Congress again. He was so happy, and he wished me a happy holiday, asked
about family and stuff, carrying on even though he's one of the people who has
fallen through the cracks. Crawling out of bed was a lot different. My legs
may creak, the right knee ain't what it used to be, but I've got legs. It really
rattled me last night — set a real somber tone — like what do I have
to complain about? Then this came whirling down the virtual vacuum tube with
a bad e-mail address:
>sign: Gemini
>
>TalkToKramer: I just want to know one thing. Do you ever write a postive
>upbeat Gemini horoscope. I'm kind of tired of the gloom and doom. The
>gloom and doom that only seems to show up on your site, not in any other
>horoscopes or in my life. Could you please pick it up?
>Stacie
Now the Gemini's are complaining? But from the one I talked to last night, it
seemed to fit just fine (the scope). And the asnwer is, of course, in the easily
accessible archives.
11/20
Class tonight. I have this note tacked up over my desk, reminding me to see
about that DSL set up for this trailer. Apparently, trailer parks like Shady
Acres are not popular telecommunications destinations. If only I had cable TV,
then I could get a cable modem. Of course, that presupposes I have a TV, to
begin with. Nope, I read books. I watch the Neighbor's cable or just my own,
inner TV. It's usually a lot more interesting. But that still doesn't get me
fast web access. Fully expecting Sunday to be another cloudy, rainy day, the
cold sunlight warmed my little spot, and I managed to figure out that I could
clear a few miles around the lake, if I timed it right. But as I turned north,
crossing the river, that cold breeze came whipping down the little valley and
I mercifully cut my hike way short. I have a general rule about hiking in Austin,
it's got to be warm enough to wear shorts and sandals, and preferably, no shirt.
In a desperate attempt to get some sun and fun, I broke with the tradition,
and went ahead and hiked in the stiff breeze. Not a bad idea. Late last night,
I was checking what my work looked like on another
site. Got me wondering about the various web destinations, the other astrology
writers people read. The number of astrologers seems to be multiplying, but
the quality? How many of these so-called "experts" are really low
brow enough to be real? And how many are going to agree with my new theory about
Venus? See, check the earlier thread about hate mail, and all the love notes
from Caps, and Venus is in Capricorn now.... There's a corollary. Might have
been the Cap I lost to yesterday, while at the Hula Hut. She threatened to make
me walk home if I didn't let her get the bill. For a change, yeah, I let her
win. Never argue with a red head. Okay, in answer to that question, go to site
index — then click on
free stuff — then click on favorite
flavor. Got that? Yes, you have to click to get there. It'll be back on
the front page next week. Good web workers are so hard to find these days.
11/19
I woke up to the cat making an attempt to be very cozy. It's the cold, wet weather,
she's not a big fan of rain. Can't say, at this point, that I am, either. It's
been raining for something like 40 days and 40 nights, and I haven't seen enough
sunlight, or had a good, long walk in what feels like eons. Maybe this little
trailer will float on down to the Gulf Coast. Hopefully, it's warmer there.
I like a snugly cat for a little bit, but her routine gets old after a while.
What was cute one morning is no longer cute the following weeks. "It's
supposed to snow today, of course, those are the same guys who predicted it
was going to be sunny, too. Hey, you'd make a good weather forecaster. Who else
can be right, maybe 50% of the time, and still have a job? Astrologers?"
[The Neighbor] We hooked it over to the Spoke for some rainy Saturday breakfast,
and ran into the most enthralling waitress in long time, a Taurus, and at first,
I missed the fact that she had blue and green streaks in her blonde hair —
I thought it was a trick of the neon light. "I'm a punk rock hillbilly,"
she explained. After a huge chicken friend steak for a meal, I had a quick reading
to do — another Taurus and her Virgo friend — then it was off in search
of something with a Pisces. Our route left Austin, took us to Georgetown, then
over to Taylor, then back down through Elgin. For a Vegetarian, she sure has
a knack for finding off beat BBQ places. We wound up in front of the Pisces
TV set, killing a few moments, and watching her favorite program: America's
Most Wanted. "I know I'm going to see someone I know on that show someday,"
she offered by way of explanation. How do you beat that? Sushi. Try the Texas
Roll. Way down South First, it's a hit.
11/18
Yesterday morning was worse than one before, not only was it cold and gray,
the sky was leaking water, too. And the cat's dish was empty, again. Given her
considerable girth, it's no mystery as to where the food disappears to. Steve
Earle was moaning on the radio, and I slipped the Grateful Dead's "American
Beauty" into the CD player, "It's just a box of rain..." [Grateful
Dead music always reminds me of Northern California, where I'll be next week.]
"Fear not my truth. The moral of my wit/is plan and true. There's all the
reach of it." [Troilus and Cressida, IV.iv]. "Skunk rock!" "Huh?"
"Yeah, it's like Punk rock, only it really stinks!" It's a love and
hate relationship with the local
radio, but they were playing Toni Price last night. There is a ring which
spells out "love" in an arcane style on my desk, a blue earring, along
with a sidewinder fishing spoon. The rest of that quote from Shakespeare, written
on a scrap of paper, and half a match book from Guero's is on the desk, too
— remnants of the day gone by. I'm still wondering about last night, too.
I fished this out of the 54 e-mails I read [and in some cases, responded to]
all before lunch yesterday, another nice note from another nice Cap. Three of
the most sterling notes have come from Caps this week, Capricorn's to the rescue
[I just hope everyone is still friendly after next week's scopes go up]:
>And when I get a reading from you
>in real life-each time is inspiring and uplifting in my worrisome Capricorn
>mind. I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate you.
11/17
The day dawned cold and cheerless, the cat was sitting on my chest, wondering
what I was still doing in bed because her food dish was empty, and that's clearly
an emergency. The empty dish, that's something which requires immediate attention.
If it was just warmer, yesterday would have been another perfect one with no
shoes and no shirt. Regrettably, the atmospheric conditions dictated I wear
clothes, although, for a while, it looked like a day when I was never go to
stir forth from my flannel "sleep wear." The Gemini bailed and at
least one Virgo came through. There was much activity in the next trailer over,
so I stopped by. I was looking for a mild form of diversion [besides searching
for, then finding, the perfect McGyver link for next week's Virgo scope], and
the Neighbor answers his phone, and immediately starts arguing with another
fellow about who is supposed to make the next beer run, and while they're at
it, pick Frank the Cap up from work. "Magnolia?" I perked up. So,
I hopped in their car, drove it to Magnolia, handed Frank the keys, gave him
the message, "More beer, but don't go to the place on the corner because
they're out of Bass [Ale]." Then I set myself down to a special plate of
BBQ Chicken enchiladas. As I was walking back to Shady Acres from Magnolia,
a lovely women stepped in front of me, and I admired her female form through
the clingy, black dress. [So sometimes I'm just a sexists pig, give me a break,
you would've looked, too!] And my sight stopped at her shoes, big, chunky, platform
looking things, and I was about to make a comment about not very practical footwear
when my sight strayed to my own feet. And just how practical are cowboy boots,
with their pointy toes and narrow, high heels? Her platforms looked marginally
more comfortable — although, the way she swayed, I was getting dizzy. Late
last night, the Aquarius question was "But Kramer, how do I find 'Enlightenment'?"
All you have to do is rub Bubba's belly, "Right, Buddha in a cowboy hat."
>Personally, I think it's crazy if people think your scopes suck (..and have
>the audacity to tell you so). I think it's quite rude considering the time
>and effort you put into them, and folks still can't even appreciate 'em just
>for that..
>
>On a more comic note, however -- I "chortled" about your little disclaimer:
>about astrologers taking themselves too seriously -- when in fact you've got
>"astrologees" taking YOU too seriously!!
That about says it all.
11/16
The old message boards
are about to be replaced, but until then, the boys [and girls] in the back room
are seeking ideas. What questions are most important? What do you really want
to know about the Fishing Guide to the Stars? A Leo rescued me from the cold,
mean streets of Austin — in all honesty, I was doing just fine, I had just
pocketed 4 nice, Roma tomatoes from a vendor at the Farmer's Market. "Want
a ride, little boy?" Sure. I'm not afraid, I'll hop in anybody's red truck
for a quick ride. "Well, I need a drink." Imagine such noise from
a Pisces? And where would I take just such a Pisces at a time like this? {"Space
Trucking" by Deep Purple, I thought, was perfect tune to send the night
off} we started off for Curra's, but it was too packed, and we wound up at Guero's,
and after watching the bartender mix my Pisces friend a drink, I mean, I used
to sling whiskey, so I counted a six count before he stopped pouring the tequila,
no wonder that place rocks. Maybe it was the best place to soothe a Pisces furrowed
brow. I got figuring, completely separate from anything else, what I spend,
per month, on servers, web pages, access lines, and net services. Then I figured
my phone bill, then the pager, the voice mail, and the cell phone. I spend more
in one month on electronic gizmos than I do to rent a spot at Shady Acres. My
'mortgage payment' [Bubba's bait & loan] is less than what I spend on being
'wired.' That's weird. I got to fiddling with 'shopping cart' web software,
but I never did manage to get anything working. I was fueled by the coffee after
dinner, but this was tempered with a serious sugar dose from the ice cream mixed
with a real praline. Right. Good thing this tin roof is here, as I bounced for
a little while.
>TalkToKramer: So what is with all the hate mail about your readings. I
>think your readings are pretty right on. At least they have been for me.
>It would be too weird if all Capricorns in the world had a day exaclty how
>it was cited in the scope. Too many other factors have influence. I feel
>bad that folks are spittin' bad karma your way because things aren't going
>their way. Sometimes life just sucks regardless of the planetary
>influences. In the words of a Taurus friend and native Texan
>from the Dallas area.... "these folks just gotta suck it up and deal with it".
11/15
Dear Diary: the day dawned cold
and bright. And just got weirder, all day long. What's wrong with my joke telling?
"It's either the content or the timing — that's all," [spoken
like a true Virgo]. While another Virgo applauded my home improvement tips.
No, the day got a lot weirder. I'm running into a deadline I've got to meet
before I take a vacation
with my family. There's an entry, started on my Visor,
which I commenced at sundown yesterday, while I was sitting the growing dark,
the twilight hour. It had to do with Tuesday being a near perfect day, except
for those two e-mails below. I completed a column,
I had some vegetables with a second helping of Sweet Potatoes at Threadgill's,
found Pa
Wetzel's name in the Dallas paper, I wandered downtown to one coffee shop,
went to a bookstore
and picked up a new Bruce Sterling novel, moseyed on over to another coffee
shop, watched the people walk by and met up with a Virgo, listened to a poetry
reading, had some crayfish and crab, then made my way on home, having just given
a Scorpio a hot tip on
telecommunications, and saved that same Scorpio a pile of money [and made my
life much easier — three letters: DSL.]
Now there's a lot more to that one Tuesday afternoon, but as I sat there in
the shade, as it was getting cooler and cooler, just starting to shiver, I kept
thinking that it had been a perfect day, complaining e-mails notwithstanding.
I think the real secret to happiness is to do something you like. I like writing
horoscopes, I like playing around with Shakespeare's texts, I enjoy toying with
web design. I like most of the people I meet. I really like being hastily rushed
into a dinner party which turns out to be a Scorpio birthday party where I'm
the only male in the group. And hot Cajun food to go with that proposition?
That's way too cool. It's all bonus. And when the half dozen women don't bow
and scrape because I'm an astrologer? Hey, I'm cool with that, as well. I don't
get it, not after yesterday, if I was doing something I didn't like, then I
wouldn't do it. Before I was ever ready to roll out of the trailer, I got this
rather amusing 'top ten' list from a Capricorn, I believe the comment was, "What
do you expect, I was doing it on the fly?"
Top Ten signs a Sagittarius has crashed at your place:
#10 - Towels hanging to dry in places you don't normally hang them.
#9 - Books and CD's are no longer arranged alphabetically.
#8 - Mysterious evidence of "shedding"
#7 - Cigarette butt(s) floating in the toilet.
#6 - Books and CD's found that aren't even yours.
#5 - Various concert flyers on the floor that didn't make it to the trash can.
#4 - Leftover pizza on the counter.
#3 - A fencing foil (?)
#2 - Half empty bottle of Sambuca (placed anywhere).
#1.5 - Mass depletion of Q-tips.
#1 - Lots o' toys!
So the Cap's list was funny, but I don't think it would apply to me — I personally can't stand Sambuca. The mail bag also yielded up so other notes. Hint: this doesn't garner much of a response from me, other than to make me sour on writing this stuff at all. The dilemma: write happy stuff, folks get upset, write sad stuff, folks get upset. These were responses to last week's horoscopes. With mail like this, I'm inclined to not put anything up at all. While the top ten was a good chuckle, this stuff gets tiresome after a while:
>im a libra. we never get a good horoscope. maybe my planets are ass backwards
>or something but my life is pretty bad right now. i read your horoscope
>column every week. every week. i love yor Texas style but my horoscope never
>comes true and it is never good. it never says "you will get a pile of money"
>or "your 17 year old will finally staighten up and learn to love school" no
>no no. just "I'm gettin to it" or some such nonsense. I may stop reading
>yours and complain to astronet. give us a good one next week or dont write
>one for us at all.
So that was one Libra's take on a sad scope, but wait, here's a Sagittarius, on a happy scope:
>By the way, I enjoy reading your web site, but I have to tell you that you
>got last week totally, inexplicably, and thoroughly wrong. A judge reversed
>every single ruling he had made in my case against former employers to date,
>and granted them a summary judgment against me. It was the most bizarre thing.
>
>And instead of an "angel" coming forward by the end of the week, every single
>friend deserted me. Not one person called all week to see how I was (and
>it's now Tuesday, and no one has called). So instead of having an angel, I have
>learned that my friends are all the fair weather kind. An excruciatingly
>difficult time.
>
>I will probably keep reading what you write, because it's amusing and
>well-written. But if any week ever made me believe that there is nothing to
>horoscopes, it was last week.
But still, I keep
on writing.
11/14
I think Monday morning was the first time in a long time it's been colder in
Austin than it was in San Francisco. There's a single pink rose left on the
kitchen's window sill, a memento from a Gemini. Or was it a Capricorn? And how
I wished it was the Virgo. The rules for shotgun?
I had lunch the upscale Castle Hill Restaurant yesterday noon. Sweet. I was
actually dining with a lawyer friend, his wife, and listening to tales of raising
children. Such a nice couple, and one of their kids is very, very Texan in his
approach to a lot things. That child has no shame, not from the tales I heard.
Made me proud. And then there was the airport run with the red headed Capricorn
which no one should confuse with the blonde Capricorn from the day before, nor
the sweetly sultry Virgo, or that animated dusky maiden, the Gemini. Confused?
You should it from here. Besides, how many people take a leisurely trip to the
airport to do a little shopping, dining, and then an after dinner treat? All
before class? I mean, go to the airport to hang out some, rather than, like,
you know, get on an airplane and leave? It started like this: "Hey, you
awake yet?" "Yeah, just got up from my nap, how did you know I was
thinking about you?" "Look, want to get some ice cream before my class,
instead of afterwards?" "You know, I've got to run to the airport
and take care of this ticket thing American has screwed up again...." "There's
an Amy's out there, you know...." From Shady Acres on Riverside, it's a
straight shot down to the new airport, and we laughed at how fast we go there.
Then I had a brilliant idea, since the Cap was just going inside to change her
ticket, maybe they would, like, you know as a courtesy gesture, stamp her parking
ticket? "As long as you're going into fantasy land, might as well go deep,"
she suggested. But while we were at the airport, we did get Salt Lick BBQ [brisket
straight from their Driftwood, Texas BBQ pit], then some Amy's Ice Cream, and
we did browse a shop. Seems like this has become an annual event for us, she'll
have to do something to a Thanksgiving ticket, and we spend an afternoon at
the Austin Airport. Now, for a change, the note for the day has switched from
mutable signs to Capricorn. The nice ticket agent at the American counter [for
that matter, one of the first American officials I've ever encountered who was
nice] was Capricorn, my friend the red head is a Cap, and the guy who made the
night's last cappuccino was Cap. I'm sensing a pattern here — Venus just
hit Capricorn, wonder if that has anything to do with it?
11/13
Continuing yesterday's thought, it was an amazing night, a quick trip to the
East Side, much reminiscing, some late night thoughts, dogs with flatulence,
yes, even that. I was working on another poll of some kind for the web page,
but I changed my mind. This place is interactive enough for the time being,
and I couldn't come up with questions which would be amusing to me, amusing
to the staff, and not raise the ire of somebody out in Web Land. I passed Ruta
Maya Coffee Shop yesterday afternoon, noticed a friend or two on the patio,
stopped long enough to poll them about the political
situation. "WWF style, just oil the politicians up, and let them at
it in a ring, see what happens...." Best idea I've heard. One of the small
joys I have in running a joke list is the amount and variety of stuff which
filters through to my computer. I always wonder about some of this stuff, but
this picture
got me going on a strange pattern of thought. It's not really an unusual sight
in my Texas. And this is what makes other folks think we're so strange? Heck,
that's normal. Late last night, I had a date, "Well, yeah, we called you
up and asked you to join us for dinner, that's a date!" So maybe I missed
something there, I thought we were just doing some Saigon Kitchen food, late
on a Sunday night. "Hey, you're as interesting as an 8–Track."
Yeah, thanks.
11/12
Dave? Dave! "Hey dude, I got to work tomorrow, so how about breakfast today,
instead?" So it was off to Magnolia, like, one more time, and then a little
skating around to do not much of anything, and then, yeah, well, like sure,
a movie sounds like a good idea.... One of the prettier neighbors of Shady Acres
was out walking her dog, "Man, I've just become obsessed with this election
thing." When will the madness end? [Mid December, best estimates right
now.] I had dinner with a Scorpio girl and Cancer guy at Matt's El Rancho last
night — "I don't get it, this place is always packed, I mean, it's
like people have been coming here for years," the Scorpio was explaining,
"like 20 years or more." Maybe it's because the food is good, or maybe
it's because of something else. I got one of those weird calls last night, really
late. Now, you're not going to believe this one....
11/11
It's that magic day, 11/11. Yesterday was made even more magic by this announcement,
via the grapevine, from my sister's
efforts. I took time out from computer work, in the middle of the afternoon,
to take a long hike around the lake. I needed a chance to get out and just feel
natural stuff again. A couple of turtles had bobbed to the surface, so I could
tell the weather isn't that cool, not yet. And then there was a great blue heron,
winging its way in, and unfolding itself on the shoreline. Time for a little
fishing. Texas Chili Parlor for dinner last night, and getting there was a little
bit of a mistake, see: the usual route goes right by the Govenor's Mansion,
and there was a media circus still going on. I thought I could have day free
of this stuff. Stopped by the record store to buy a CD. I couldn't remember
what I went looking for, but Dwight Yoakum's latest was on sale. Got that and
a decent price on a used Emerson, Lake and Palmer CD. "Yeah, I can see
how those two are related, like, they're both CD's, right?" "Welcome
back my friends, to the show that never ends...." "History shows again
and again how nature points up the folly of men, Godzilla!" [BÖC,
Spectres, 1977]
11/10
Not sure, still.
Being from Texas, where blood sports, politics and BBQ all get mixed up together,
not to mention that voting irregularities are rather commonplace, I can take
a detached and amused point of view. I don't usually dabble in politics because
I get caught up on the underdog side everytime. Folks not from America are,
judging from the correspondence, finding our election process amusing. Boring,
but amusing. And from within my own circle, I'm looking forward to saving enough
money on the promised tax cuts to go and visit all my friends and family who
leave the country if Bush wins. [C'mon, if Gore wins, friends and family won't
leave the country, so I don't get a tax cut, but I don't have to go aboard to
visit the ex-pats, either.] I'll be covered either way because I did register
as a Republican. Never voted for a single one of them, just registered that
way. The best analysis I read yesterday came from a British
source. A little distance across the pond sure added some much needed objectivity.
And the more I read about this election mess, the more I realize I certainly
didn't throw away my vote — it seems like every vote counts. Something
to think about next time. Of course, listening to some friends and family, I'm
not sure there will be a next time... c'mon, even my worst horoscopes aren't
that gloomy! It was another Gemini day. And I'll be glad to get back to my own
life, just as soon as this election junk is finally over. I wonder if we all
get tired enough, then we'll just throw up our hands in despair and take whatever?
11/9
Best Calvin
and Hobbes — a perennial favorite. A real political
brawl — only in Texas. 49 degrees was the high in Austin, and wasn't
that the percentage of the vote? Small joy I have in Mercury not being backwards.
I was amazed at a couple of close races, one on the national level, just how
close the race was for the presidential thing, and the other, almost a mirror
image, was the local race for and against light rail. I may be Texan, but I've
lived in other parts of the country and I've traveled abroad. Austin needs something
just like light rail. I'm sorry it didn't pass. But I was greatly heartened
by the closeness of the race, my informal, nonscientific poll pegged it as a
landslide against. Means more people are thinking about solutions. Now let's
hope this presidential thing sorts itself out. As I wandered the weird Austin
streets yesterday afternoon, I was bundled up against the cold, wet air. While
I was getting tanked up at Texpresso, I watched while a cadre of "media"
characters rolled through the door to pick up supplies, reading from a reporter's
notebook, "I'd like two hot chocolates, a double cappuccino, and two plain
coffees...." (WFAA,
Channel 8 in Dallas). Then there was an AP Wire guy, according to his tag. I
guess folks thought the show was going to be over last night, but it looks like
the delay will last. Peg–0–rama showed up last night, and we wound
up with sushi as the main course. I noticed a funny thing on the menu, really,
Peg caught it first, the "Austin" sushi roll. A usual mixture of ingredients
(normal stuff like fishes and seaweed and rice) then the whole thing is deep
fried. Now that's Texas, through and through. Me? I stick to tuna rolls, good
enough for dinner, and bait, too.
11/8
"Dude, aren't you going downtown to the big party? I mean you, if anyone
needs to be there, you do, right?" No. Me awash a in sea of troubled young
Republicans, drunk on victory? I don't think so. I'd rather clean my
closet. But don't say I didn't warn you. I got such varied reports — some
stuff coming in via the web, other from live news wires, and then, of course,
a Gemini or two with their ubiquitous phones, updating me on what's going on
— Gemini's, always the best for the up to the minute news. Late last night,
I got two e-mail's, back to back, [virtually at the same time], "Looks
like Gore's got it," and "Looks like your Guv will win...." Bubba
the Gemini still gets the best plug: "Yeah I voted, but on the presidential
thing? I put down, 'This spot intentionally left blank.' Huh." Like the
local populist suggests, if they really wanted us to vote, they'd given us candidates.
There was light, cold rain falling. Really late last night, Sister from California
calls and leaves a message about her disappointment with the election process.
I do believe she was upset that a more liberal person didn't win. Can't say
I didn't call this one [c.f., 10/29].
11/7
>I know I'm coming off like the Yankee I am, being pushy and impatient.
I just got such kick out of that one. Like, being Southern means we're slow
and stupid. Maybe not stupid, but being slow sure irritates the Yankee's. Then
inspired from another Capricorn — "By the pricking of my thumbs, something
fishy this way comes...." (with apologies to MacBeth's weird sister) —
so I was wandering around downtown Austin yesterday around noon, a red headed
Capricorn with me, and neither of us feeling too good, when we were set up by
Right Wing supporters of the State's Governor. TV cameras, reporters, "man
in the street" interviews. We hastily avoided all that mess. They didn't
want to know what we would say, as I am inclined to speak my piece. By now,
you know the drill, Democrats vote on Tuesday, Republicans vote on Wednesday.
I had Pho Cong Ly [downtown] for lunch, then fried catfish for dinner. Whew.
Got the "all you can eat plate," and that was a mistake — never
try to figure out if you can beat the buffet — it's a losing proposition.
Then we got to chatting with a nice little Sagittarius waitress, "Jupiter
is retrograde?" "Yes, along with Mercury, Saturn...." and the
rest of the drill.
11/6
"When does it end? How much longer must this go on?" Gemini calling
in long distance, complaining about the aforementioned Mercury going backwards.
Her palm top quit working — she took it into the computer store. The little
machine fired up just fine. In near hysterics, "Is it JUST ME?" No,
actually, it's a little planet, and it hits everyone a little different. Think
about the guy at the computer store, "She's just blonde — it
worked just fine." Although it never really got cold, it did rain, rain
and rain — which sort of evokes a Chili Parlor sentiment. The perspicacious
waitress recommended the Habenero Chili as opposed to the regular triple x brand
stuff. She was ever so right — it was great. Not just good, but great.
"Fire in the hole!" I didn't shed a single tear, and I managed to
be manly enough to avoid drinking the proffered glass of water. In fact, I even
sprinkled a few extra peppers in the mix. Good, good stuff. Muiscal variation
for the evening went from Blue Oyster Cult back to Wagner's opera.
11/5
Some days just wind up more difficult than others. I was sitting, rather I was
standing, in the town square, in Lockhart, addressing two Virgo's and a Pisces,
and all I could think, in my oratorical best, all I could think to ask was,
"Are we all about done with this Mercury being retrograde thing yet?"
It's like one of those songs, a "dance hit" from ten years ago, maybe
longer, one of those tunes which loops back on itself, stutters a refrain a
second or third time, then loops back yet again, to repeat the same musical
refrain. Moon's way into Aquarius — sure, I'm the astrologer, that explains
a lot. "Delays have dangerous ends" [Shakespeare's Henry VI, part
I, III.ii.33].
11/4
I came out of the trailer yesterday morning, looked up from under the leaking
awning, and waved to the neighbor. He looked at me, looked me up and down (dressed
for the office), and then his eyes saw a penny. He picked it up, flipped it
over, looked at me, said, "Make a wish," and heaved the penny into
a rivulet of water coursing its way between the trailers and carrying downfall
on out to the river–lake. The penny landed with a splash, but from our
vantage point, it seemed like the penny was carried out to sea.... Dinner at
Matt's El Rancho with a Sag, an Aries, and a [this comes as some surprise] a
Virgo. But the Aries had the wit on, "Yeah, Kramer, you're like me, we
deal with the 'hereafter' a lot." "Huh?" I asked. "I go
into a room, look around, and ask, 'What did I come here after?' Right?"
11/3
Rain. More rain. The best exchange was yesterday morning, at Magnolia, as I
slid into a booth, opposite a Virgo and a Pisces, the waiter slid in right behind
me, and he suggested I get two gingerbread pancakes with pecans in one, bananas
in another, with a little side of bacon, "You're so predictable,"
Frank the Capricorn said, "hey, wait, that's what you do for a living,"
he added — much to the amusement of the two girls with me. So the mutable
sign thing has continued, unabated. It's either a Gemini, a Pisces or a Virgo,
all day long. The break has been a nice Aries. But once again, it's the rain
which is the main thing. I got soaked all the way through, and only got a little
a break, arriving back at Shady Acres with all my clothing damp. I did get laughed
out for my fashion choices, but I was spending the night on the phone, listening
to clients and looking at charts, and the shorts didn't match the flannel shirt
and neither matched the pink bandana I was wearing to keep the headset out of
my tangled mass of curls. Wet weather makes my hair more curly. Looks like today
will be one of those days, too — but I got this one beat: I'll be in a
nice, dry office all day long.
11/2
Is it always Halloween in Austin? Consider what attire is deemed normal around
here, it could very well be the case. I was thinking about clothing choices
as I slipped into a Dias de las Muertas attire, jams, sandals, Hawaiian shirt.
It was, unequivocally, indubitably a Gemini flavored day. Oh yes, I voted. The
guy I voted for probably won't get elected, but as I was contemplating my choices
in the voting booth, instead of pulling that straight party plug, I did some
figuring, and started checking the boxes I liked. One vote may not matter, but
several might. I met one Gemini at Guero's for a patio dining experience [expecting
a Virgo to join us], another Gemini joined us, then the waitress turned out
to be Gemini, then I met another client for a reading (oh yes, guess that sign,
and I'm seeing a trend here). Just call it a Gemini day. Bubba gets credit for
the best Halloween adventure story, "I cal lit 'performance art' but they
called 'indecent exposure' and 'public lewdness.' Go figure, huh?" He also
took a minute to expound on something rather remarkable, as I was noting it
was a Gemini day, "If there were nothing but Gemini's, then the Internet
would have been invented in 1485."
11/1
Ma Wetzel's Birthday, got to remember to send her a birthday fax. I've got to
dig up another bit from one of Willy's Plays, got to find another few lines
of verse worth doing over and over and over for class. Costume question: Surfer
or Cowboy? I opted for the cowboy because I was sitting in a dark, Air Conditioned
movie theater for most of the evening. But with the prevailing weather, the
surfer outfit would've been better. Scary movie was very scary. [Lost Souls]
The rest of the evening ended with a thud. I never made it out to the big party
on the street. But there was a special highlight to it all, I called a "Low
brow mystic." Never been called that. Liked it. Liked it a lot. Low Brow
Mystic. Works for me. The Nov.
News hit the wires yesterday. [Less than 1% advertising by volume —
best deal on the web.]
10/31
Another battery
recall. Yesterday morning, I was looking for some local color in El Paso. I
wandered off to eat a little breakfast, then stopped by a gas station to buy
a lottery ticket, then ambled into a Western
Wear Factory Outlet. The enterprising salesman assessed me quickly, I had
on a clean pair of blue jeans (Levi's — I don't fit in Wrangler jeans —
I have a Levi butt), white button down shirt, a cell phone call from a Virgo
(wait, that's not clothing), and a pair of Lucchese Ant Eater (black) cowboy
boots. Sort of normal wear, maybe a little formal. "Those Ant Eater's,
you know they're 'extinct' now?" I looked bewildered. To be honest, I usually
look bewildered when talking to sales people. After looking around at the racks
and racks of boots, I decided, even though the prices were real right, I couldn't
afford a new pair of boots, not yet. Maybe I'll get me some for Xmas. Seeing
as how I've now got another endangered species pair of boots, I guess I'll have
to replace them. [The term 'extinct' means the hide will not ever be used for
boots, or any other product, ever again — it doesn't mean the little critters
are in danger or anything, please!] Then, when I was trying to find out someone's
belt size, I realized, as I was walking around a store, looking at manly footwear,
I was acting just like a female I know — buying footwear in order to feel
better about myself. Does this suggest
I'm really in touch with my feminine side? I spent the rest of the day doing
the usual thing, getting on and off airplanes, getting in and out of taxicabs,
getting home, turning around and hightailing it out with a Capricorn for a little
dinner before class — then class itself. I had a good time, the director
hit one of my buttons just right, "Do it like a Southern preacher...."
Bingo. That Capricorn grabbed me after class, and we caught a movie at the Alamo
Drafthouse (dollar Monday) — "The Way of the Gun." Worth a dollar,
that's for sure. More than that? Doubtful.
10/30
Sunday morning, I was having breakfast with a couple of the folks from the Austin
crowd, and I was asking about how one couple was getting home from the airport,
later today. "Pat left yesterday, and his truck will be at the airport,
we'll just take his." "How you going to know where it is? Oh, that's
right, you're psychic." It was weird, at the end of the night, to hear
coworkers and various compatriots, veterans of the road, all saying "see
you next year," but as it now stands, this is the last real gig
I've got until the new year. Another weird thing, as of tonight, I have no booking
for Halloween. The first All Saints' Eve I've had off in over 8 years.
10/29
Slow day at Hanging rock in El Paso. The election came up as a frequent question.
I'd suggest that George Junior will carry this town. [And my non–astrological
prognostication, as it has been for several years now, my suggestion is that
George wins. Sorry, I call them as I see them, not as my bleeding, liberal heart
likes 'em.] Had dinner last night with all the crew at Jaxon's [something or
other — whatever] and I'm lame about the dinner description because yet
another Virgo was a little disturbed that I had my steak so rare. I can't help
it, it's the way I like them. I was so tired by the end of the night, I fell
into bed and even missed surfing for the Xena reruns. Micorsoft?
It seems terribly cold here in El Paso, the extra hour od sleep means I was
up an hour earlier.
10/28
I was getting ready to leave for the airport when the phone rang — my trusty
Virgo buddy was there already, "Taxi service, ready to go." It's a
long and involved story, but I wound up getting to the airport, in the rain,
about two hours early. Oh great. Try killing time at the airport when Amy's
isn't open. Then bounce to Dallas, then bounce to El Paso, then bounce to the
airport, then wait for clients. Now, I know Mercury is retrograde, and I know
Mercury is making life uncomfortable, and I know travel plans get all screwed
up. So when I got to El Paso last night, the worst thing that happened was trying
to log on with that special 800 number. I'm always amazed at the amount of mail
which stacks up when not around to answer it. Breakfast this morning: Chorizo
and eggs. New still shot from
El Paso, perfect for a Halloween thing. Sister will be proud.
10/27
The sweet strains of being on the road. Gemini Gemini Gemini. Gemini. "They's
ever where!" I hooked up with the Gemini ["I'm not THE Gemini, I'm
the third from the left...." she says] and took in the State
Theater's version of the Scottish play. Rather well done, if you ask me.
Doesn't hurt that I'm taking a class from the director, or that I know a couple
of the minimalist cast. Really well done. Spooky, well acted, excellent side
effects, scary, bloody, and blessedly short. There was a heavy dose of Christian
symbolism in the play, working on an angle I've never seen before. Nice stuff.
Since I've been on that stage before, I know the rake's angle, it's pretty steep,
and I know how hard it is to walk up and down while not falling into the pit.
Okay, so the sword play, what little there was, could have used some better
coaching, but don't even think of asking me to get up there and do it —
I couldn't — not without impaling myself pretty good. It was an excellent
production. I sort of thought Lady Mac stole a bit of the show, but that's personal,
I guess. I wouldn't know, I'm not hanging around a lot of power mongering women.
Nope, not me. Careful of what the witches say, the oracle is often true —
literally. Ask the would be king. Off to El
Paso, finally.
10/26
There's this curious thing about writing horoscopes, some people respond with
the most embarrassing of details — I just wonder if they are all this frank
with everyone they meet on the street. Cigar for breakfast? Sure. I was looking
for BBQ info and found
it. Why was I looking there? Because the Pisces came and fetched me up in the
afternoon so we could take in the sights, sounds and smells of Lockhart. Made
the best discovery, too — the home made bread at Chisolm Trail BBQ (Floyd's
place.) Better yet, Floyd's son, ["Floyd Junior?"] was working and
talking with our Virgo host. The Younger Floyd's name is "Tinker."
Why I love these towns, weird stuff just like that. In order to find a decent
cup of coffee after hours (Lockhart rolls up the sidewalks at 6:00 PM), we headed
over to San Marcos — ooooo, a college town. So a perky Gemini exchanged
coffee trivia with us, then served up a triple cappuccino for me. ["Here,
two shots of espresso, one shot of decaf. Try it."] After the coffee, as
we walked around the square to get back to the truck, I stopped to read a historical
plaque on one building: the Newton Boys had used so much nitroglycerin when
"opening" the safe in this building, they had blown out about half
the wall, scattering coins and bills all over town. Now, my Pisces friend is
from "back East," as they say, and "back East" the historical
stuff is along the lines of "Washington slept here." In Texas? We
like real stuff, like bumbling, semi-mythological crime figures. As the historical
marker suggested, the Newton Gang retired in South Texas, and lived well off
their modest income, presumably it wasn't all Social Security.
10/25
This is an embarrassing admission. I hate it when someone toys with my CD player,
like rearranging the careful order of the music. I fired up the player yesterday
morning, intending to hear a little opera and work away. Up comes that Gourds
CD, the song about El Paso, and lacking any better companionship, I grabbed
the cat and danced around with her, singing along softly. She wasn't accommodating
though, as she refused to mew in harmony with either me or the song. A little
later, after, and I quote, "the best Queso ever," at Magnolia, I was
riding along with a friendly Virgo, cruising down South Congress Avenue, listening
to War's "Low Rider." I guess sitting shotgun in a Mercedes ["Hey,
it's an old Mercedes, okay?"] sort of detracts from the ambiance. Or adds
to it, kind of depends. One thing really nice about Texas and Texans, when it
comes to things which are bigger, gaudier, and more outlandish than any place
else in the world, what place is more perfect than Texas?
Options for dealing with a bounced check? If it's out of state, I think (I'm
not sure, but I think) I can press for some kind of mail fraud, sending me a
bad a piece of paper. Or I can turn it over to a collection agency. Or I can
file some sort of charges. Or I can call down a plague of locusts, frighten
them with bad Kramer Karma (should be trademarked), or I can wait and let Mercury
sort it out to a happy ending. Of course, like most things Mercurial right now,
everything is taking a little longer than it's supposed to. Blame the planet,
not me.
10/24
"Sweet are the uses of adversity."
[As You Like It, II.i.12] Not big stuff, just little stuff. A single
bounced check from a client. Outgoing mail not working from my server. Just
little, minor, frustrasting details. Like losing a cell phone. And I thought
I was getting off easy on this Mercury thing. Further Mercury notes, an apt
metaphor, methinks:
>Raining there? Raining like heck here. I think we are getting are annual
>8-10 inches over a 3 day period. One nice thing about that. You discover
>all the new leaks in the trailer that you didn't know about before.
Perfect way to look at it, all this rain, points out them leaks we meant to
fix — but forgot to. Moore Maker (cowboy
gear) gave me holler yesterday afternoon. Nice to hear from West Texas (Matador,
TX). While on my way to the Shakespeare acting class last night, I crossed the
Congress Avenue Bridge (the barrier between North Austin and the home of South
Austin's Shady Acres), and I was getting mildly damp from rain, the river was
swollen, but the wind was blowing everything on the surface the other direction.
All that flotsam and jetsam didn't know which way to go. Down stream or up streram?
Same as Mercury being backwards. But at the class itself, I did get to tread
on the stage, and I did get to spout lines. Now, I figure I sounded a little
bad, but, I really enjoyed the experience. It's a tough gig, making it all work.
Mr. Director (Guy Roberts, State
Theater fame), is really, really good. I just have to keep from calling
him "coach," from time to time. It's a natural slip.
10/23
Yesterday afternoon, I was listening to my father's sister from Kentucky talk
about grandchildren, her grand kids, which had been present at the big birthday
party. "Lego's, they need to make them magnetic so you can just wave a
wand over them to gather them. I have picked up — just under three million
Lego's...." That side of the family has been, how to put this, highly prolific?
I have a boatload of second cousins. Now, I did have one particular one, a cousin
down in Houston, and we haven't had a chance to say so much as "Hello"
to each other in the past dozen years, sort of dropped off each other's radar
screen. He's about a year older than me, working in the oil biz, and raising
what has to be the cutest of kids I've seen in a long time. Better yet, I knew
I had a good bond with my cousin, "Man, kids are great, if you've got kids,
you can do things that otherwise folks look at you funny for." I spent
most of the first day of Scorpio in the company of a Virgo, wearing a shirt
that's really amusing: "Life's too short to live in Dallas" [Railhead
BBQ, Ft. Worth, TX]. Interesting note (c.f., Virgo
comments late last month): one coffee stand on the concourse at Dallas Love
Field offers White Mocha Coffee (but still no soy milk). However, there was
major panic last night, after getting home, I realized my [bad words omitted
for the sake of propriety] cell phone was not attached to me. Or my belt. Retrace
a few steps, #1, plane lands after an hour delay in Dallas, #2 Mercury is retrograde,
#3, I was just saying this has been a relatively painless Mercury Retrograde
for me, #4, on the way off the Company
Plane, I thumbed the cell phone on. #6, a Pisces calls me, and asks about
some dinner plans, #7, the damn phone, for all I know, is rolling around on
the highway between Shady Acres and the Austin Airport, so I get back into her
car, ride over the airport, report back to the gate and fetch up my phone. Then,
for all her efforts, I reward the poor Pisces girl with some dinner at [name
omitted under penalty of a severe beating because it's a cute tacqueria on South
First Street which is relatively obscure] while discussing some new ideas for
a business project. #9, am I ever to be glad to be back home. Did I mention
I hate it when a customer bounces a check to me?