Subject: June Fishing Horoscope
Date: 5/25/98 9:24 AM
To: Monthly Mailer
From: FGSKramer@aol.com
Subject: June Fishing Horoscope June Astrology - Fishing Guide to the Stars
1998 (c) Kramer Wetzel
Prince Harry: "Why then, it is like, if there come a hot June and this civil buffeting hold, we shall buy maidenheads as they buy hob-nails, by the hundreds." {Henry the IVth, part I, act II, Scene iv, line 454}
June Overview: The McDonald Observatory, located in one of the prettiest spots in Texas, always delights in showing visitors images of Saturn. It's a pretty planet, rings and all. But in astrology, dating back to them ancient Greeks (not to be confused with the modern ones inhabiting university environments), Saturn deals a harsh message. Saturn sneaks into Taurus towards the end of the month, and the Ringed Wonder brings a large dose of work with it. For many of the signs, this is going to appear like a yard crew showing up to deliver some fresh fertilizer for your garden. In the Texas heat, that rich material might not smell so nice. There is hope though, because something nice can grow out of it. Saturn is probably going to upset the weather patterns, too, but that's not a shock to Texans -- we're used to Texas Weather. It might be a Hot June yet.
Aries: There's a slow march in the heavens this month as the duly noted Saturn makes a gradual escape from Aries. It's a good time to plan your own escape, too, if only for the briefest of respites from the summer heat. Saturn leaving your sign, even if it's only for a little while, is like having a cold can of beer pressed to your fevered brow. Both the can and your head have been sweating it out, and this month means a truck load of relief shows up. And the best part about that cold can of beer? After you sooth your aching head, you get to take a sip. It's like a delicious glass of ice tea on a hot day. I hope you get the picture.
Taurus: Venus is in your sign for most of this month, so you're going to want to spruce things up a bit. Between a Greek god (Saturn), and a lovely nymph (Venus), you've got a lot to deal with. The thing to be wary about is the fact that Saturn was most highly revered by the Stoic Greek, and that would suggest that a little more stoic behavior would benefit you best. The benign influence of Venus is fleeting, bringing good taste for a short period whereas Mr. Ringed Wonder brings a lot of work. Get prepared to take some of the office with you on your vacation -- you'll thank me later. And, you'll be amazed at how much work you can done at the beach.
Gemini: This month is going to be like a hot Saturday night at Gruene Hall, arguably Texas' oldest dance hall. With nothing but ceiling fans and open air, on a good night in Central Texas, with the fiddle player cranked up on coffee and beer, you're going to be feeling just like that fiddle player, or the incredible reel that he's playing. Mars is in Gemini, all month long. The dance you do this month is a hyperactive speed-country-metal thing, but in the background, if you can stop long enough to listen, you will hear the roots to the music, based in some old Country Swing music. Whatever you do, make sure that you have on your best duds and your dancing boots because you're going to be dancing, all month long, to this insane fiddle jig.
Cancer: There's more than one Cancer who will run up and kiss me this month because of the promise of a new day, a better day, and a fresh beginning. Mercury makes a fast swipe at you, and this works like a little octane booster in the old truck. You will get a sudden dose of extra pep, and renewed acceleration. You might also get whiter whites with your laundry this month. There's an odd connection between the laundry and the stars; however, some old laundry from several months ago might resurface this month. It's not going to be a problem -- you're in good shape to deal with it, being faster than ever on your feet.
Leo: The first ever recorded real rodeo happened in Texas. It's also a commonly accepted astrological fact that the mighty Leo loves to be at the center of attention. This month, you get just such a chance. Enjoy the glare of the lights because you are going to feel like you are in the center of the Mesquite Rodeo Arena this month. The only problem with being in the center of the arena is that it means you will be participating in this sport. Check the facts, it can be a little on the brutal side. Anything less than a Leo might shy away from riding a monster creature named "Thunder Ball." One way or another, sometime this month you will get 8 seconds of attention which will boost your career to new heights.
Virgo: There's an emotional trigger at the beginning of this month which can exacerbate some of your romantic notions. But be patient, and keep the trademark Virgo whining to a minimum at the beginning because this situation quickly goes from bad to worse to good to excellent. It's a fast trip on the emotional roller coaster. However, like that roller coaster at Astro World Six Flags or even the one in San Antonio, the ride winds up being worth it in the long run. Adopting a healthy attitude, and anticipating the trouble at the beginning of the month just makes the ride that much more enjoyable. The month may begin a little rocky, but by the time the fireworks stands are in full bloom, you'll be much happier.
Libra: It's vacation time! A traditional astrological interpretation indicates that this is an excellent month for "foreign travel". To Texans, well, our state has it all, so "foreign" travel is a little bit easier. Get yourself to some destination across the state and enjoy the change in scenery. Route 66, the actual road, has a certain appeal this month and you are going to feel an urge to hop in the the old truck, and head out across the land, looking for adventure and whatever might come your way. I'll guarantee that it's going to be a good trip, no matter where your travel plans take you this month.
Scorpio: There's a slow march of the planets as this month begins to unfold. It's like a road map, the one in the glove box of the family car. A map that no matter what you do, you just can't seem to fold it up right again. This month has that definite star map quality to it. Instead of trying to stuff the map back in the glove box, just pick a destination and go. The month kicks off with something that feels like fireworks, only the pyrotechnics are about 30 days early. However, this display of emotions gradually fades and your stars start to shine brightly for the rest of the month. And the map? Don't worry about it -- I'd just stuff it back in the glove box.
Sagittarius: There are three topics which are hotly discussed in Texas: Politics, Religion and BBQ. Of the three, BBQ is the most important. And it's a big topic this month because the sign of the Archer is going to feel like firing up the BBQ in the back yard -- just getting ready for the annual Fourth celebration next month. There's a problem with this act of igniting the mesquite and charcoal, though, and Sagittarius is going to be more prone to making mistakes with doses of gasoline and lighter fluid. Extra caution is advised during the normal summer rituals. Special note: this applies to other implements like lawn mowers as well.
Capricorn: Imagine the ubiquitous "Bell Curve." Now imagine yourself on this bell curve display. Your month begins in a slump, rapidly climbs to a peak in the middle, and then starts to slide down the backside of the curve at the end of the month. Of course, no Texan would ever admit to being "average" at anything, and Capricorn is not average this month either. While the Sun is moving into a position opposite Capricorn, Saturn is moving into a fortuitous position for you. The downside of the curve should have a happy economic return for you. While money won't buy everything, at least in Texas, dollars can rent just about anything, and money helps ease the pain.
Aquarius: You're going to wonder about me as I suggest that the best cure for the Texas heat is an old fashioned trick borrowed from childhood: a dash through the sprinklers, the ones watering the lawn right now. It seems a little out of place, but the difference between a full-grown Aquarius and a child is often times delineated by a very thin line. This difference begins to resemble a semipermeable membrane rather than any kind of a firm point of demarcation. And if a dash through the cooling jet of water spray is just not on your list of things to do this month, consider trying it on an metaphorical level. You're going to need to turn up your fun quotient this month. Luckily, Venus and Mars are in cahoots to help you do just this.
Pisces: I know it feels like you have put on a little extra weight at the moment. In reality, though you look just fine. However, that doesn't stop you from looking in the mirror and wondering which bathing suit to wear. In fact, you may have a strong desire for the type of beach attire worn by our ancestors, the Victorians, and you will be most certainly shying away from some of the over-priced strips of ribbon which are currently labeled bathing suits. Relax, itÕs just Jupiter adding those few extra pounds. While you may not feel like slapping on some oil and heading down to the beach, sitting in the office this month allows you a chance to get ahead of your business competition.
FGS World Tour June
6 & 7, El Paso, TX
June 18 - 30, London, England
July 25, New Age Books [1006 S. Lamar]
Aug. 1 &2, Austin, TX [South]
Aug. 8 & 9, Lubbock, TX [Holiday Inn Civic Center]
Aug. 15 &16, El Paso, TX
Aug. 22, New Age Books [1006 S. Lamar]
Sep. 18, 19 & 20 Whole Life Expo Austin, TX [Palmer Auditorium]
Oct. 24 & 25, Austin, TX [South] Oct. 31 Ñ
Nov. 1, Corpus Christi, TX
Jan 2-3, 1999, El Paso, TX
Feel free to mail these horoscopes around to your friends, or enemies, we really don't care, but remember, your supposed to include everything done to the end of the signature, because the lawyers said so.
Want more?
http://www.io.com/~fgs The Astrology Home Buoy
http://www.astrofish.net The Mercury Chronicles, or the Vault of all the old monthly stuff...
The Astrology Spot, one of our most popular referring links.
Easyscopes, another popular jump spot, across the pond.