From: KramerW@aol.com

"Frame your mind to mirth and merriment,
Which bars a thousand harms and lengthen life."
Christopher Sly in the introduction the Shakespeare's Taming of the Shrew (ii.142)

Monthly Overview of Astrological conditions: Mercury spends the greater portion of this month in an apparent retrograde kind of action, and its path might start at the very earliest degrees of Sagittarius, but Mercury is going to be sliding backwards through most of the Scorpio this month. Just to warm things up.

On a far happier note, Mars continues in a forward motion slipping into Aquarius in the tail end the month. Venus is at home in Libra, and that's going to make a happy go of the little speedy one's apparent bad news. Jupiter and Saturn are still both moving backwards as well, but this is just a temporary thing, subject to change soon. Especially Jupiter who is slowing to a halting pace.

Aries: You're not the only sign that gets this kind of a message this month, but your the most important sign to get the message this month. Mercury and some of the other planets, too, have a way of bringing back old flames, old situations, old business partners, and done deals which aren't quite done yet, all of these seem to come clambering back during a month like this. Being the hopeless romantic that I am, I would look forward to seeing some of the old flames. Maybe not all of them, and certainly not all at once, but a few would be nice. Unfortunately for you (and me), these old flames seem to stir up a degree of passionate energy with your current flame. This isn't always good. It can lead to a situation which has been described as "hairy." So I would watch out for this right now. If the old friends do show up, perhaps it's best for you to get them a place to lodge besides your front living room. I've found that it works best like that. And make sure that you have plenty of whatever you need on hand to keep the current love interest interested.

Taurus: You guys are such a nice sign, I just hope that you can understand the gentle nuance necessary to get by this month. There's not the big thing going on that's so obvious, there's not the one grand event which demands you attention. But I'll warn you that your normal senses and perceptions need to be a little more finely tuned this month in order to grasp the deeper meaning of what is happening. It's not all bad. Just different. The usual stuff with Saturn is still kicking up dust, but underneath Saturn's heavy hand, there's still a little Mercury, and he's in this fray, ticking away. I know it sounds like it might be a timer on an explosive device, but that's really not he case. It's just a way of marking time until you get launch what it is that really want to do. Mercury is going to trigger something grand this month, but he's going to let Saturn have a hand in it, too. So there's a big deal hidden as a small deal this month. Now pay close attention because you're going to feel like you spend the month setting off in the wrong direction. It's like a needle wavering in an old compass, you keep thinking you are going the right direction, but until Mercury rights himself, you're inclined to follow a wrong path.

Gemini: There's a cartoon on TV that's about a semi-mythical town in Texas. And one of the cartoon characters mumbles unintelligibly throughout the whole show. Guess what character is Gemini this month? That's right. As long as Mercury is making your life miserable, why not just pretend that you are in a cartoon? Entertainment this month is high priority, and as long as the planet is stacked up against you, make some sort of use of its errant energies. So what if no one understands what your Gemini character is saying? Does that really matter? (Of course it matters what a Gemini is saying, it's just no one seems to understand you this month.) Now that you've been properly warned about what is going on, then consider that you are a central character in this drama, especially this month, just don't count on being understood. Some characters are like that, and it's your role for a little while. Before we get to the end of the month, your real voice comes back, and you will get the last laugh. Comedy is a strange thing.

Cancer: This is not going to be a wonderful month, not from what I can see. The mystery is multiple, Mars and Mercury. Mercury, its errant path already circumscribed, is a known quantity. But Mars? Alas, I have not good news. It's due to the red orb's apparent position that you are going to find some troubles brewing up. Regrettably, this isn't like something that comes from a Micro Brew Pub, the little spots that have become so common these days. [Bubba's Bait Barn Brewery?"] It's not a pretty time. Mars is opposite the sign of Cancer for most of the month. And that's going to exacerbate the Mercury problem. It's like you try to "talk it out" with your significant other, and guess what happens? He - she - it just doesn't get the message. Now, I know that this is not so uncommon in times like this, but the best thing to do is to relax a little about this problem. I wouldn't want to suggest that there's absolutely nothing you can do, but it looks pretty bleak for getting anyone to understand your point at this time. Make notes, write it down, ponder what you're going to say, and then wait until a better time, like closer to the holidays, to speak your piece. Or plea for peace.

Leo: Get yourself a head start on shopping ideas for the big party season which is right around the corner. In fact, start putting away supplies for the big bash and resultant shopping spree which is necessary to prepare for the upcoming events. I would start on a list just as soon as Mercury goes retrograde. Then I would head out to the malls and start shopping. I didn't say BUY anything, not yet. Gifts which are bought when Mercury is retrograde stand a better than average chance of being returned. And the 90- day warranty might not extend in the next millennium, even if the salesman assures you it will. But do make a list. Then get ready to shop during the Sagittarius Season, which starts at the end of the month. Remember, the operative word is "list." Maybe a plural, make several lists. Just don't actually try to implement what's on your list until later. Trust me on this one, please.

Virgo: As much as you dread the upcoming Mercury pattern which is etched in your razor sharp Virgo brain like a great warning from some distant galaxy, you also need to be reassured that this is a good month for any number of unlikely — but ultimately beneficial — occurrences. It's not something that you can actually put your little fingers on. It's not something that you can point to and say, "Look, here." It's more like a subtle flow of energies which is reassuring. So what if the littlest planet in the solar system is flying in the face of convention? You still have this extended forecast about how good the general situation is. I'm more reminded of some of my friends down along the border. Although the legal language may be English, the predominate language is melodic blend of Spanish and English. Call it what you want, but the border patois is beautiful. And just about every sentence is punctuated with a "Bueno." It's sort of a declarative statement that sums it all up pretty good. It means, "good." And that's what this is like, this month. It might be delivered in a strange language, but it's still pretty good.

Libra: Simply put, this is a good month. It might not be a stellar month, but it ain't bad by any standards. One of the little problems you're going to encounter this month, though, is that you feel like its the best possible time to be preparing for the big "Year Two Thousand" debacle, and suddenly, about the some time Mercury starts his backwards motion, you're going to be feeling like a lot of the doomsayers are correct. Now, if you're going to be around me on New Years' Eve, better plan on me flipping the breaker switch off and on, just once, and hollering out "Surprise!" This sort of panic filled moment is what part of your month is going to be like, with that mercurial influence. Things aren't as good as they should be, but the flip side of that coin is that things ain't going to be too bad, neither. Venus lingers lovingly in your sign for most of the month, so while there is a momentary disruption of normal services and lines of communications, just like me at the fuse box, you still get a reprieve. One way or another, though, the month finishes out in a good fashion for you.

Scorpio: The day after Halloween is revered as several different holy days, depending on ethnic, cultural and religious persuasions. In my family, it's always remembered as Scorpio Mom's Birthday. Now, the upcoming Mercury Truancy is not going to be well received in some circles, but it is a fact. However, there is too much going on in the Scorpio world to worry excessively about a little planet like Mercury. There are any number of good influences beaming their way into the Scorpio world to let a little problem like Mercury get in your Scorpio way. Of course, with this planetary moon walk happening in your sign for most of the month, be prepared to feel a little like a comedian who keeps missing the spotlight. You keep moving, and just as you move, the spot light moves someplace else. It's like that, for most of the month. Then, towards the end of the month, about the time Sagittarius starts, you're going to give up chasing that darned old spot of white light, and guess what? That's when it focuses right on you.

Sagittarius: There's an old C&W song about "all my ex's live in Texas...." which begs the question why do I still live here, too? But my personal life isn't the question here, it's more what is this Mercury backward boogie going to be? It's like a sport which has all but disappeared: Bungee Jumping. So this month has a long reach to it, a big stretch, and then, like that proverbial big rubber band in the sky -- everything snaps back into place. Us Sagittarius folks, though, we have some mighty interesting stuff happening this month. Dark secrets, distant rumblings of thunder come from across the plains of life. It's like sitting on West Texas porch, the sky is clear the sun set is blazing magenta across the sky, and Mars is twinkling on the horizon. Way off in the distance are thunderclouds, and you can hear the thunder. It doesn't really feel like rain, though. So it's like watching that weather in Texas, it's there, but it isn't "here" yet. Be a little more patient, and be willing to deal with the odd problems which seem to come back from who knows where. It's like watching that weather. It might never get to you, but we could sure use the rain.

Capricorn: You're going to blaming a lot of whatever happens this month on Mr. Mars, even though there is a little Mercury Retrograde thing going on. And you're going to be feeling like it's still a long and hot summer in Texas, even though it has finally started to cool off some. What's the source of all the fevered passion stirring up in Capricorn Land? It could Venus, in a compatible earth sign, or it could your ruling planet, Saturn, in a compatible earth sign. Or maybe it's just Mars himself, working you over the grill like some good old fashioned Texas BBQ. Better yet, you need to be a little careful this month, there's a special kind of treat that comes from points east of Texas, I'm thinking about our good neighbor Louisiana, and it's called a Deep Fried Turkey. So as long as you are feeling the heat and passion of Mars, this month, try to be a little extra cautious with some of actions because you don't want to end up as a southern specialty, like that Turkey. Careful with all the heat that Mars gives off, you can also wind up blackened, another culinary treat from Louisiana. Hot and tasty, for sure, but it can make your eyes water, as well as clean out your sinus cavities.

Aquarius: Read Pisces this month. Then realize that I can say all those same things about you, only in reverse. The month starts out bad, gets worse, and the high turkey day gets closer, things get better and better. It's as if you dread the holiday season which is approaching at an increasingly alarming rate, and then, all of a sudden, you realize that it is good time, and things are going to be all right. I would certainly urge caution this month, though, in a specific area. Careful about purchasing early Xmas presents. You need to think about some of things you're interested in acquiring before you get them. It's an old joke around here, but you need to make sure you wife or girl friend really wants power tools and a trolling motor -- that sort of thing. You're going to be tempted to make some rather outlandish purchases early in the month, and if I can only get you to wait a little longer, you're going to find some much better deals, right around the corner. I know you don't fit with the normal Xmas shopping crowd, but this is one month it is better to blend in — later.

Pisces: I can't duplicate the feelings of a little, offbeat film from several years back, but I can try and express what it is going to be like. There's a growing sense of fear, loathing and dread as the big T-Day Holiday approaches. Either you're going to be with your family, and you might not be looking forward to that, or you're going to be alone, and wishing you were with your family. Now, you get the idea here? Doesn't matter where you are, you're going to want to be over there. And even if you aren't located in country where this is a big celebration, you might just consider it the first of the Xmas marketing wave that's going to hit you full in the face. The month starts out good. Then as folks begin breaking out the Xmas decorations, you begin to feel a little funny. It's that gnawing in the pit of your stomach. I just figure it was the truck stop food from last night. But my culinary adventures, and that foreboding sense of dread just get worse as the month draws to close. So it's going to start out wonderful, and slowly deteriorate as time goes by.

Feel free to forward this missive on to you friends, or enemies, we don't much care, but remember to include everything done to the signature to make sure the lawyers are happy. A happy legal counsel is a good thing.

AOL users only: free readings and much talk about astrology, bait and Austin cuisine on Wednesday nights, 9:00 PM CDT in the AstroNet Conference location. It's a weekly online chat sponsored by AOL's AstroNet.

Nov. 6, Whole Life Books, 1006 S. Lamar, Austin, TX
Dec 18, Whole Life Books, 1006 S. Lamar, Austin, TX
Y2K
Jan. 1, Dallas, TX
Jan. 7-8-9, El Paso Millennium Extravaganza (El Paso, TX)

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