horoscope

Week of: 5/17-23

Hear'st thou, Mars?
Coriolanus in Shakespeare's "Coriolanus" [V.v.161]

The semiannual game show question is loping along in Leo this week. The rest of us are still haranguing it out with Mars. Saturday, the 22nd, I'm scheduled to be doing readings at New Age Books in Austin, swing on by if you're interested in my take on things.

Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream is out in the theaters by now — a worthy play and a worthy adaptation, it's one that gets a hearty recommendation from all of us here at the office. Except the cat. She's not fond of Puck replacing her as the trickster in the bunch: "Lord, what fools these mortals be!" [III.ii115] While that might be Puck's line, the cat likes it, too.

Since I'm back fro a wild ride in the western part of the state, and this is what one Virgo wrote in:

>Hello Kramer,
>
>I have been a current astorfish reader for about 6 months and thought it
>was about
>time to try my fate at an "El Cheapo". I have been living in Ukraine, one
>of the Newly
> Independent States from the USSR, so Odessa TEXAS hooked me. However, I
>must
>say I was disappointed to read the following quote written on one of the
>servers you
>provided to look up this weeks answer. It said, " Pointing to the
>county's supposed
>resemblance to the steppes of RUSSIA, a railroad official named the first
>settlement
>in the county Odessa...." Odessa is located in Ukraine. This territory
>has had a wild
>history but the locals have always considered it Ukraine, no matter which
>country
>happened to rule. Is Odessa Texas a port city as well?
>
>On with the show... I am assuming the answer you are looking for would be
>the
>authentic replica of Shakespeare's Globe Theater. Shakespeare Festival
>held Feb.
> through April. And on the grounds is replica of Ann Hathaway's cottage
>that contains
>antiques and Shakespearean library.
>
>However, I must say I would be more interested in seeing the crater!!!
>And, I
>believe I couldn't by pass the largest Jackrabbit statue without getting a
>photo. That's amusing.
>
> As for the complaining VIRGO's out there maybe we are just to caught up
>in one area
>at this time that is not happening as we would like to see the good which
>is before us.
>Your May 10th quote, "I would still see a certain degree of progress
>happening in
>your life, especially in a TURBULENT work/romance area --your fine Virgo
>ability to
>discern the real problem is going to help this week."
>
>Turbulence seems to be a natural state of mind/emotions for me for a
>while.
>Thanks for the words of wisdom. R
>
>PS. Did you know what happens to Kramer when spell checked???
>You get Karma or at least on my computer.

The crater is kind of dull, I much prefer surfing the sand hills west of there, out in Monahans. And some day, I'll collect all the Shakespeare sites in Texas, and do something interesting with them. Kramer is Karma? And Odessa named for the steppes of Russia? See what sort of interesting things one can learn from reading Texas astrology?

Aries : Many words can be used to describe an Aries, but one word which is seldom used is "nonchalant." However, there is a certain degree of indifference that you need to approach this week with. Act like you don't care. Or, better yet, act like you do care, but it's not like you care that much. This nonchalance is brought to you by a Mars and Jupiter thing, in the heavens, and while this usually means that you are overly energetic this week, due to the vile back spin that Mars is throwing right now, the nonchalance pays off better. So what if your fishing buddies have a new bait that is guaranteed to work better than anything else? Your old ways are still probably best, especially this week.

Taurus : Business acumen is a vastly over rated skill. At least, in most circles it's more highly touted than it's really worth. However, you have degree of insight this week which can provide you with with some wonderful returns on investments, if you are only willing to put this to work for you. The Sun is headed towards Gemini, and it's time to put the party stuff behind you. Time to get back after working. In fact, this is a good week to consider bringing work home with you. A little late night research into a work problem, a little bit of staying up late and expending a little extra effort has a big reward. Of course, this the rewards of hard work have never been documented here at FGS World HQ, but I've heard that it can be great.

Gemini : We are at the beginning of another very special Gemini cycle. It's supposed to be a good Gemini cycle. In fact, it's supposed to be a wonderful cycle. The problem that I've had with validating the wondrous nature of this cycle, though, might also be a problem in your life. Despite all the nice things that are going on in the heavens, the planets might not line up well enough for you. Close, but not quite. Call this week a near miss, and I think that you'll be happier. There is some promise for future rewards, but even a week in Gemini time seems more like a lifetime to you guys. You're overactive brain hits high gear this week, that's for sure.

Cancer : There's the oddest little hint that Venus has a good surprise for you this week. It's not a bad hint, although, I know a few Moon Children who will insist that it is a bad time. It's really not. Venus is in the early side of the Cancer sign, and her presence makes everything a little better. And to top it all off, she makes the strangest little angle to some other heavenly objects, some time this week, and this angle will produce a "developing situation" which merits attention. Of course, if it's a situation that you hear about on the evening news, maybe it doesn't warrant your bandwidth, but I wouldn't be surprised if you actually did like what you saw this week. I don't want to make you think it's all flowers and roses, but you know, it just could very well be that.

Leo : A little over a hundred years ago, an American writer called her "that old ninny woman fate" and I'd bet that you are really inclined to agree with the sentiments of that comment, especially this week. Don't get upset with me, I'm just telling it like it is this week. Every time you turn around, there's going to be one more Minor Detail which needs you attention. Minor Detail sounds like the name of a band, too. Ever heard them? Or of them? Now, you can get bent out of shape because you friends and associates are not fulfilling their end of a contract or agreement, or, you can do the righteous noble thing which has Leo written all over, and help take up the slack. Help us take up the slack and I'll promise good things in your future -- just not this week. Name that writer and the source for the remark in quotation marks, and I'll see about hooking you up with an [abbreviated] El-cheapo report, delivered via e-mail.

Virgo : If you can overcome some of the smaller details left laying about by the smaller people in your life, I'll say that you can persevere and triumph this week. And despite what other astrologers are suggesting, I still think you can have a good week. But this week is going to be good because it is of your own making. Fishermen are not inherently creatures of superstitions, but if you have any good luck charms, any amulets, any gestures which are destined to bring you luck, then this is the week to do whatever it takes. One of the Golden Rules of Pythagoras was to "First, worship the Old Gods as custom decrees" or something like that. My ancient Greek is a little rusty. While I'm not advocating some pantheon of odd deities, there is a hint that old good luck charms work this week.

Libra : I just don't like the astrology of Libra this week. But I'm glad that it's there for you guys, because it's going to [eventually] yield up some good results. The planets give and the planets take away, and I might have that order of events backwards, but I'm sure you can work with it. Realize that Mars is merely clearing a path for himself right now, making headway, as it were. It's like looking for special spot by the lake. You work your way through the underbrush, fight swarms of deadly mosquitoes, have your clothes ripped by vines that bear an uncanny resemblance to barb wire, and you finally get to that special place, only to find that some other fisherman has set up camp. Now, if you are just willing to brave the elements a little bit, you can move a few feet away and enjoy enormous good luck. But you have to face the deadly elements of nature, first.

Scorpio : As much as I love the sign of the Eagle, or the Scorpion, or whatever totem critter you want to call yourself this week, I can see no ease or grace coming up right now. There's a lot that could be happening, but I just don't get that it's going to be an easy week. Long term rewards for hard work are certainly suggested by this week's Astrology Fish Scope, but the long term rewards and the short term view of the week just don't exactly match up, if you know what I mean. This is a week for deep, Scorpio thoughts, all by yourself. I know you're getting tired of me picking on you, but I'm not abusing you at all. I'm just suggesting that the planets are acting like a conspiracy theorist to keep you alone this week. Blame whatever you want, but be prepared to work alone, and be prepared to work a little harder this week. "Oh sure, that's easy for YOU to say," is the Scorpio sentiment, "you fish for a living."

Sagittarius : Balance is a tricky thing, usually for a Sagittarius. In fact, Sagittarius is not noted for its good sense of balance. Or noted for its good sense, but that's a different question. And finding that appropriate middle ground is what is so important this week. Should you pursue this one course of action of which sure to have dire consequences, or should pursue the the path of least resistance? I understand that might be a rhetorical question because what I know about Sagittarius is that you will likely follow the path that offers more adventure. This least resistance stuff just isn't you. There will be some unplanned and unforeseen results from this more arduous path that you choose. But it's also going to be a week when you hit a detour along the way. And detours like this can lead to some of the best fishing spots.

Capricorn : I cannot, with good conscience, give you a bad horoscope for this week. There is one little planet that is stirring up dust for your sign, but there are some big planets which are grading over the dirt road of life, and turning this dust into a passable pathway. Just for you. Not for any other sign, but just for you. Some astrologers warn about romance problems when Mars is retrograde, but then, we're back to the road grading analogy. Get in the Earth Mover of life, and smooth out some of the bumps. Like I suggested before, there are some planets bigger than Mars lending you strength this week, so put them to work for you — and not against you.

Aquarius : An astrology chart is a symbolic wheel, and I kept spinning and spinning the wheel for this week for Aquarius. The bad news is that I could arrive at no firm conclusions. Doesn't matter how I add it up, weight the predictions, assign absolute values to each planet and sign this week, yours just doesn't make any sense. I do know this, however, no matter what I suggest, I'm pretty sure that I am going to be one hundred and eighty degrees (180Ľ) off for Aquarius. See, there's good and bad this week, or in more humanistic approach, challenges and gifts. The Yin and the Yang. The eternal "maybe." And my viscera tells me that this is a good week, but you have a few little pejorative influences as well. The trick is not to let the annoying details get in the way of your rosy big picture. Winds up being good, we just got to get through the details, first.

Pisces : If you have read any of my poetry, it would scare you, but I was thinking about writing an "Ode to a Pisces Lover" this week. Only, my poetry is more odious than ode - like, past life experiences notwithstanding. But gentle Pisces reader, you do need some lovely lyric poetry this week, and since your own personal scribe can't seem to deliver, maybe you could do it yourself. You'll find that this week is a good week for dreaming about what could be. And it is less than a good week for actually taking action to make these dreams a reality. So compose a little fish poetry and enjoy the week. The "Lesser Eleven" (that would be the non-Pisces in your life) are all having a tough time, and you don't need to rub their noses in the fact that you're getting by okay.