From:Sean McCauley

>>Top ten NEW signs you're at a redneck wedding
>>
>>10. Preacher keeps getting interrupted by train whistles.
>>
>>9. Members of the wedding party dressed in matching Realtree camo.
>>
>>8. Five-year-old ring bearer is the only one who isn't carrying a gun.
>>
>
>FOR THE RECORD, ANY SELF-RESPECTING TEXAN WOULD HAVE HIS FIVE-YEAR OLD
>PACKIN'HEAT...IT'S JUST FOR THIS OCCASION, HE'D HAVE TO USE HIS SHOULDER
>HOLSTER (HANDED DOWN FROM HIS OLDER BROTHER, THE GROOM) TO KEEP HIS HANDS
>FREE TO CARRY THE FELT PILLOW THE RINGS WERE PLACED ON; THAT FELT PILLOW
>BEING MADE OUT OF A STUFFED, SEWN SHUT, CROWN ROYAL BAG, OF COURSE...
>
>>7. Reception buffet includes a bowl of BBQ pork rinds.
>>
>>6. Couple drops candle lighting ceremony in favor of sharing the unity toothpick.
>>
>>5. People shouting 'hey cuz' to everyone they meet are not just being friendly.
>>
>>5. Vehicle with "Just Married" painted on it also has a 12-point buck tied to the fender.
>>
>>4. Couple is already arguing over whose bass boat to take on the honeymoon.
>>
>>3. Live band cancelled in favor of the McDonald's Winston Cup simulator.
>>
>>2. Reception ends early so the bride can attend high school graduation ceremony.
>>
>>...and the number one new sign you're at a redneck wedding...
>>
>>Among the things opened at the reception: several cans of whoop-ass.
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