Horoscopes for 4.23.2020

“Good Signior Angelo, you must excuse us all,
My wife is shrewish when I keep not hours:
Say that I linger’d with you at your shop
To see the making of her carcanet,
And that tomorrow you will bring it home.”

in Shakespeare’s Comedy of Errors 3.1.1-5

Horoscopes for 4.23.2020

Sun conjunct Moon (New Moon) loosely conjunct Uranus 9:45 PM, 4/22/2020. Saturn squares that mess, too.

Taurus

Taurus
Love me my little Taurus friends, and sure wish them a happy birthday season, and now? There’s a right way to do this, and there’s a “wrong way” wherein, “wrong” has the incorrect connotation, but there’s a less than wonderful, too dramatic route. I know, birthdays, new moon and all, but maybe, just maybe, this isn’t the time to rush straight into that situation. To me, this looks like a boss of one form or another, and it looks like the boss is making undue requests of your Taurus self. Way to win? Acquiesce. Consider, I know birthdays and all, but consider what I call a tactical retreat. Just falling back to regroup and rethink a tactical situation. Could be simple office politics, could be an overbearing friend. Give in a little to win. At least, for now, pretend they’re right. Makes for a lot more fun birthday time. Right? Stay home?

Gemini

Hard to believe and difficult to grasp, but there is a certain amount of sex appeal that every Gemini has, and it shines this next couple of days. It was an old joke amongst friend about the way certain places in Texas, certain people, would wear that — whatever it is — and work it correctly. As the Gemini, you’ve got, now use it. This can be employed in a number of different situations, and the problem being “sex appeal” doesn’t equate to “sex.” But there is something inherently appealing these days. Use it. Use it wisely.
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Horoscopes for 4.16.2020

  • “And kiss me Kate, we will be married a’ Sunday.”
    • The Taming of the Shrew (2.1.315)

    Horoscopes for 4.16.2020

    New Moon in Taurus loosely conjunct Uranus April 22, 2020.

    Taurus

    Taurus
    Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shrew is possibly one of the most vile, sexist pieces ever written. Even funnier considering there’s substantial evidence to suggest the real Shakespeare author was a woman. I was listening to some Shakespeare material and the presenter suggested that Kate is quite disingenuous, possibly sarcastic, as she is merely tolerating the suitor to get her way. “She wins by humoring this idiot who marries her,” was the suggestion. I looked at my date, as I was discussing finer points of the scholarship, authorship notwithstanding, “You think some strong woman would just put up with an idiot boyfriend so she could get what she wants from him?” “Why Kramer, whatever do you mean? You’re always so much smarter than me.” Even I have to roll my eyes at that retort. I wonder, has this one just been putting up with me because she thinks I’m occasionally cute? Or useful? “Oh no, honey, I would never treat you like that.” Happy Taurus birthday, and enjoy the humor, where you find it, but with the planets where they are? That pressure on Uranus? Are we being humored?

    “An intelligent person wouldn’t have to ask that question, Kramer...”

    Gemini

    Venus and Mars are making nice, but we talked about that, right? The two major hurtles, for Gemini? Looks like that pesky Taurus Sun and the phase of the moon, more than anything else. None of this really bad, just uncomfortable, for Gemini, and that Mars/Venus thing should be smoothing over the rough spots.
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    Horoscopes for 4.9.2020

    You are a scholar;
    I pray ye, tell me, may one credit dreams?

      Lady More in
      Shakespeare’s Sir Thomas More 4.2.5-6

    The authorship debate about who wrote Shakespeare and what plays should be included? Better left for Mercury in Retrograde. Although the play in the Shakespeare apocrypha, it fit for the week’s stars — Saturn in Aquarius and all, ya'll.

    Horoscopes for 4.9.2020

    Aries

    Aries
    In a predominance of Shakespeare’s plays, the “love potion” will last two scenes. Magic dust, squirt of a potion, something, the love potion lasts two scenes. Does that make the half-life of the potion one and half scenes? Never thought about it like that. But the idea is that the man-made material will only last so long, and after that? There needs to be a real chemistry for the lovers to stay together, or the magic doesn’t work.

    Two scenes is about right. I tend to enjoy the “instant” connections stars have on stage and screen, eyes lock, dawn realization that, “This is the one,” and the plot thickens. Or thins, as the love potion, if that’s what started it, doesn’t last more than a couple of scenes. The idea that the stuff doesn’t last long is part of understanding how to work with this week’s Aries energies. Love potions don’t last long, as plot devices, and for that matter, they don’t last that long in the real world, either. Have to have more than that first blush of “love” which is frequently a biological response to outside stimulation. Or, to some, a love potion. Which, as I’ve pointed out to Aries for this week? Love potions tend to only last for two scenes.

    Taurus

    One year, everyone I know was having medical problems. Teeth rotting out, body parts ceasing to function properly, eyes out of alignment, just the usual problems as a certain generation starts to age. What I noticed, though, as I’ve been the designated driver for a number of buddies? In my next life, I want to come back as a person who gets to wear scrubs to work.
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    Horoscopes for 4.2.2020

    Nay, bear three daughters; by your leave I speak it,
    You love the breeder better than the male.

    Richard in Henry 6.3 (2.1.41)

    Mars — in Aquarius — “squares” Uranus — in Taurus. Jupiter conjunct Pluto. Full Moon 18 Aries/Libra, April 7, 9:35 PM.

    Horoscopes for 4.2.2020

    Aries

    Aries
    It’s more like a dialogue, but here’s how the birthday week, in Aries, plays out. “Did you cause it?” We ask the Aries. “No, certainly didn’t cause it,” Aries answers. “Is it your fault?” We ask Aries. “No, it’s not my fault either through action or inaction, nope, not my fault at all,” says Aries. “Can you fix it?” We ask Aries.

    Here’s the long answer, and I’m putting words in the Aries mouth because there will be some general dissembling, trying to avoid the responsibility for something that, while not strictly speaking the fault of the Aries, it falls into the Aries world to fix it.

    “While not, strictly speaking, within my purview, yes, this is an issue that I have the ability to address, and yes, I suppose, if it has to be fixed, then I might be the best person but you do realize this this one is not my fault — at all. Really, I shouldn’t have to be the one who must fix it, but no one else seems able to attack this problem, and I guess that leaves me. Only me.”

    The more time spent fixing it? Instead of giving us reasons why it’s not the fault of Aries, which it’s not the fault of the Aries, but Aries is the best one to fix it. More time fixing? We’d be done by now.

    Don’t blame me, blame the planets. I can't fix them.

    Taurus

    In the older astrology texts I first studied? Uranus “rules” Aquarius. I like not the term, “rules.” Too patriarchal in feeling, if not in actual meaning. Still, I shy way from that term. Doesn’t stop Uranus being the leader of the planets for Aquarius. Uranus has an extended residency in Taurus, at the moment. But you knew that. Mars? Mars is now in Aquarius, where he creates a tension angle to that Uranus. Tough times in Taurus?
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    Horoscopes for 3.26.2020

    This might be the pate of a politician, which this ass now o’erreaches, one that would circumvent God, might it not?

    Hamlet in Shakespeare’s Hamlet 5.1.37

    The horoscopes are served with hope towards a better future.

    Horoscopes for 3.26.2020

    Aries

    Aries
    Brand new start. Brand new start. Brand new start. As an Aries-compliant astrology author, I understand that sometimes a little repetition does ya’ll good. This is one of those times, next few days, happy birthday, by the way, and what this means? There’s a new start. Then there’s another new start. Then there’s yet another new start. Brand new stuff, over and over. Do not be afraid to kickstart the same object two, maybe three times. One place I used to love for good BBQ? Seemed to go downhill. I tried it a second and third time, and by that third try? Again, transcendental BBQ, tender, moist pork ribs with a hint of flavor slow-roasted on the outside, making it even better. Then the brisket, perfectly tender yet filled with the hint of the smoke from the wood itself, probably just rubbed in nothing more than a little salt and pepper. No sauce required. Perfect stuff. First try? Not so good. Second try, not it yet. Third try? Perfection. Brand new start X 3. Maybe. Maybe X 4.

    Taurus

    There is an inherent strength buried in the Taurus psyche. I figure it’s part of the original wiring, a certain strength and resilience, a certain resistance to fleeting changes, and way of accepting the situations for what they are. No judgement. Might try relying on that internal Taurus well of solitude and internal order to make sense of the current crop of headlines.
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    Horoscopes for 3.19.2020

      “Life is as tedious as a twice-told tale
      Vexing the dull ear of a drowsy man;”

    Lewis, the Dauphin in
    Shakespeare’s King John 3.4.108-9

    The Sun moves into the Tropical Zodiac Sign os Aries on March 19, 2020 at 9:42 PM, more or less.

    Aries is the sign of the Ram, marked by the spring’s constellation of its namesake. The spring equinox is a celebration when the days and nights are equal in length. Equal amount of light and dark, and that means — Spring Break! Aries is a cardinal, fire sign associated with the spring, and the planet Mars.

    For the first time since Feb. 6, 1991, Saturn taps into Aquarius. Will only be there for a short time, just until July; it’s a precursor and overview. Like 1993, heading into 1994. Saturn tapped Aquarius. Makes one wonder how much of this we've seen before, right? Stay safe out there, the phones here are all sanitized for your protection.

    Horoscopes for 3.19.2020

    Aries

    Aries
    Two theories abound. One suggests that this is the sort of new start you’ve been waiting for. Launch some project that will send your accolades into the stratosphere! Get it out there! Show the world what you’re made of! Then, as I toy with the numbers, and look at something besides just the position of the Sun and the Moon? There are other, lager factors at play. As Saturn shifts signs, this indicates a time to hold back on public displays. Not hold back on typical Aries fire, nor, for that matter, don’t hold back on the work itself. But the way you announce it? Maybe slow your roll, something in that area. Let the work speak for itself. Don’t tell us what you did, Aries, show us what you did by not saying a word. Let your actions and deeds speak for themselves. Might not get the attention you want, the recognition, and rewards you rightly deserve, but it does happen.

    Taurus

    Poised on the edge of oblivion, looking over the edge? Into the abyss? What it looks like to some. Not really how I would read this, but then, I like the Uranian Influence, and Venus? She likes being in Taurus. Kind of her thing. There’s a gentle quaking underneath the Taurus feet, though, and what that feels like, to me? A passing lowrider with the volume, maybe the throbbing bass-line alone, pulsing into the concrete and the city street. What it feels like. What it means?
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    Horoscopes for 3.12.2020

    Dispute not with her, she is lunatic.

    Horoscopes for 3.12.2020

    Pisces

    Pisces
    This advice varies from person to person, but in general? Time to grab a burger. I can’t eat the three-quarter pound, dripping patty of raw meat, just barely charred on the exterior anymore. I can eat it, but I prefer not, as it is way too much for me. As a much younger man, with a younger man’s physique, I could devour such a meal. Lettuce, pickles, tomato, raw onions, maybe a slice or two of cheese, and mustard, or mayo, or whatever sauce. Maybe none. One place, locally, does a righteous veggie burger, the great fake burger. Maybe one of those, for my vegan friends. Sure.

    The best way I’ve seen the fries was an old place back in Austin, “Back in the day,” and they would have about three or four big potato slices, like a pickle spear? Only fried to crispy goodness, redolent in that stale kitchen grease flavor. Whatever the comfort food is? I was thinking of burgers, hey, in New Mexico? Probably Blake’s? Whatever the messy, greasy, possibly not all that healthy, but delightfully soul-quenching food that works? For me, the image is clearly a burger, but Pisces needs something at this time, to help assuage the beast within. Comfort food. It’s still Pisces birthday time, so food like this doesn’t count as “bad.” I still think of hamburger, double patty, mustard, onions, pickles, tomatoes, and — my secret ingredient? Jalapeño. That’s what I think of. Whatever yours is? I suggest it. The stars are so inclined.

    Aries

    Over the years, I’ve made a serious effort to stay abreast of technological changes. Paying for stuff with just a phone? Always was interesting to me, but one aspect I’m a little leery of, since, how well does one trust that kind of technology? Safe, secure, all tied to an e-mail address or phone number, or whatever? I’ve always liked cash. Some years back, while traveling and working, on the road, I did a little experiment, where the price was $36 credit card charge or $40 cash. This was more as a chance to showcase my ability to accept credit cards on the spot rather than any kind of psychological or sociological experiment. Been so long in the past, I don’t recall the outcome, but I didn’t have to make an extra trip to the bank, after that show. Yes, the processor takes a percentage, but I was learning a new way to conduct business. The other afternoon, at the grocery store, I had a couple of items, and I wanted to pay in cash.
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