Week of: 10/30 -11/5

“To your protection I commend me, gods!
From fairies and the tempters of the night,
Guard me, beseech ye!”
from Shakespeare’s Cymberline, Act II, scene ii.

Late in the week, Mars moves into Libra, and that will be a source of consternation for some, but also pleasant ripening for others. Which will you be?

Aries : Mars is doing his best to really irritate you, Mercury is none the better for his apparent retrograde position, and the precise planned passage of the moon, through her various pathways this week, is also stacked against you. Fortunately, you like a little difficult challenge, and none of this is really “bad,” just a little uncomfortable. And what’s a life without a few day in and day out irritations? In certain fishing circles, it has long been regarded that I’m the most likely candidate not to be the best guy to handle the filet knife. It’s also been determined that I’m not the best guy to handle certain sharp items, owing to my inherent Sagittarius clumsiness. That’s why I support the “catch and release” program so well — toss them back so someone else can catch them again, double your fun. And that’s the message that the heavens are delivering to you this week, just like me. Be prepared to toss back what you catch. I’m not suggesting that you don’t get a few fishes that you want to hold onto, but most of what you get, you’ll want to be prepared to return them to where they came from, in a mostly unharmed condition. As long as Mars is moving like he is, you might be best if you leave that sharp filet knife tucked away this week.

Taurus : We have a strange astrological condition which will feel like a strange meteorological condition to the fine Taurus weather we’re supposed to be having this week. There’s a straightforward hint from the planets as Mars exits Virgo (dirt sign) and get ready to enter airy Libra. Saturn is still at a very late degree of your sign, and the angle between Mars and Saturn is one that is supposed to be beneficial, especially if you’re willing to produce some hard work right now. Of course, there’s still Mercury doing a tailspin in the sign which is opposite from you, and that’s a source of recurring troubles. Maybe not big troubles because Mercury is such a small planet, but it’s still a signal that about certain communication skills you might lack this week. Between the three, I would suggest that you stick to business this week. As a fishing guide, my office is sometimes on a dock or in a boat, but I don’t think you have the same pleasure, not this week. It looks like it’s a room with four walls, maybe a cubicle, and it looks like you are being called forth to do some heroic amount of work — possibly something left over by some other lazy person. Tackle the task. Now, in keeping with the planets’ places, you might not actually see any immediate reward for this effort — except from your astrology buddy here — but you will reap some hefty praise, on down the road. Go that extra mile this week, but don’t expect to be noticed until the middle of the month. Got that?

Gemini : It wasn’t so long ago that I had a house full of Gemini’s. The bitter one, the happy one, the busy one, the rejected one. And these were different people, each and every one. No jokes this week about a Gemini’s multiple personalities, either. But if you’re not familiar with the layout of a single wide trailer, then you wouldn’t understand that this was “tight quarters” for just such a range of Gemini emotions. By the end of the week, about the time Mars goes into Libra with a bit of a bump, you’ve got all of these Gemini characteristics lined up inside your single Gemini cranium. And like my trailer’s living room on that one fateful evening, there’s just not enough room for everything in there. So even though the week week starts out with a bitter quality to it, and even though you pass from bitterness to anger, and on into busyness, there’s still a warning about Mercury which needs to be observed. This range of multiple emotions will pass, it’s like a storm, and the movement of Mars, finally, is like the day after, when the sky is clear, the temperature returns to normal, and you can survey the scene to make some strategic decisions about what do with where you’re at. The up and down, side to side motion of your world will get settled down a bit, and you can take off in one relatively coherent direction by the end of the week. Don’t rock the boat (too much).

Cancer : I’ve been reading charts and writing astrological predictions for many years. In that time, there’s a theme which occurs over and over, “You said I would hear from an old lover, but the only guy who contacted me is my ex-husband, and he’s in jail right now…” which, if you consider it, is exactly what I suggested would happen, it’s certainly an ex, and it’s certainly a guy in situation where he can communicate with you, but he won’t be coming to see you any time too soon (20 years on that one charge, time was concurrent with something else, and yes, I have a varied clientele.) The point to this exercise abut understand just how accurate an astrologer can be is important this week because you’re going to be hearing from an old flame. Or an old “situation,” or whatever word you choose to use to label that person and your relationship to that person with. It might not be the one you want to hear from, but I’ll promise that you do hear from one of them. And what develops from this? It’s more like sense, a feeling, a little bit of ennui. Not really a depression, and not really a big problem, but there’s a sense to the week that you’re just not getting what you feel like you truly deserve. The world is a funny old place, and while you might not get what you want this week, I figure you’ll follow that old song lyric, and get what you need.

Leo : There comes a time in everyone’s life when you have to look at Mercury, get a little upset with his meandering route, and tell him just exactly what you think about his inability to let you communicate. See, it’s a really a good time for Leo. The problem being, communicating that good time with the rest of us. We don’t get it. “It” is the Leo message. So it’s really not a bad time for you at all, but we’re not understanding what is going on right now. And trying to communicate joy at time like this is not going to have a good effect on you. In fact, that leads to frustration. And sitting at your desk while a maelstrom whips everyone else around AND leaves you in relative peace and harmony, is not always welcomed. So even though you’re going to have a good week, the real trick is to act as concerned, upset and distraught as other, non – Leo signs. It will make us feel better. When someone starts complaining about this or that, don’t act like you superior (even though you are), but nod knowingly, and pipe in your own complaint, too.

Virgo : Even though Mercury is still generating an undue amount of pressure on your poor sign, and even though this is creating a very discomfiting situation, you’re still going to get a breath of fresh air. It’s winter time in Texas, or the fall, or whatever season you choose to call it, and we get these days when the morning is cool and calm, with a gentle breeze blowing out of the northwest, perhaps there’s a chilly feeling to it. It’s not cold by most folks’ standards, but here, it’s a definite change. Some astrologers will tell you that foolish weather is just like a Virgo’s perennial attitude. I would tend to disagree, but the first part of the week is like that — you do demonstrate a rather foolish behavior. Of course, with the relative change in Mars, and Mars in relation to Saturn, you’re going to find that your attitude changes. And as slippery as it is to try and predict Texas Weather, you’re going to find that your mood is rather mercurial, too. The good news is that there is warming trend, and as Mars leaves your sign this week, you tend to become a lot warmer, in gentle, pleasant way. I told you that those cool mornings were pleasurable, didn’t I? Just like you.

Libra : Mars barrels into your sign later this week. Just look out because he’s coming in before Mercury has a chance to get himself straightened out, and since Mercury isn’t “quite right,” the Mars effect, as it begins this week, might not feel like you’re getting off with your best foot forward. You will tend to begin the week by selecting exactly the wrong bait for fishing. You’ll choose to use a lure when some live bait would have been the best bet. You’ll back up and switch to a lute, and then, you should have been using worms, only you were trying to use minnows. See? You keep getting close, but you’re not onto it. Timing is off. At one point, early in the week, you’ll feel like everything is off, and you would be better off in bed. While that’s a great idea, too, nothing is worse than rolling out of the bunk, having forgotten that you were on the top bunk, and it’s a long way to the floor of the cabin. Or, if you’re in the bottom bunk, getting up really fast, and banging into the top bunk which not only wakes your partner, but also creates a sore spot on your brain case. See? Even staying in bed isn’t such a good idea. Take your lumps early in the week, and get ready for Mars as he eases into your sign with a flurry of activity. Don’t worry that you might make unwise decisions this week, at least you’re doing something.

Scorpio: While most other important planets are moving forward, Mercury is still doing a little number on your ability to speak. I figure you’re talking too fast for the rest of us. We can’t keep up. I know that you have important information which you need to communicate with us. I realize that you have a deeper understanding of the way this thing works right now. I also know that you can’t seem to get the right words in the right places, or, for that matter, the right ears. I once switched from using a very fast computer to working on a manual typewriter for creating copy. It was a good exercise, and it generated some interesting results. No delete button, the keys themselves would sometimes put a character in the wrong place, and I couldn’t just merrily pound away at the keyboard and let the machine do all the work. It was an exercise in futility, but I did make some interesting stuff for landfill purposes. This is a week like that, you’ve moved from the New Millennium of computers back to a manual typewriter this week. But unlike me, you need to save all that stuff you’re creating because there is a use for it, and I would suggest that it’s more useful than my material which is gradually becoming fertilizer at the dump.

Sagittarius : One of the biggest assets I have when I’m working on a boat is the fact that I really am clumsy. Some astrology texts refer to Sagittarius as being graceful, and for the life of me, I can’t figure out where that comes from. We do have a certain grace about our ineptitude, though, and that’s the asset I’ve chosen to develop. One of the best picture I’ve got is one which was snapped just as the fish wriggled out of my hand, so it’s me, a fishing line, and a big bass headed for the lake, tail first. Photographic record. Some folks think it was a fish jumping into my hand, but we all know the sordid truth now. So we Sagittarius folks have a week of this stuff. Great prizes which escape our grasp — only to be caught in the act by an intrepid journalist’s camera. That’s the way this week plays out. It’s not really that bad, and the occasionally foul up by our Sagittarius standards pays off, but not in the way we’re expecting it to. Perhaps the best way to get through a week like this is simple. Say, “I meant to do that. No, really. I did.” Some folks might even believe us, after they are done having a good laugh. Laugh with them, it’s easier this week.

Capricorn : There’s a let down coming at the end of this week. I’m warning you about it now, and except for that one Capricorn who will write to me and let me know how wrong I was, the rest of you have a great start to a wonderful week, given the fact that Mercury is up to his old tricks. The week starts out great, even if Mercury is backwards. It’s not a bad time at all. And it gets better and better, as the week goes by. Then, at the very tail end of the week, just in time for weekend, things all slide downhill. Instead of ruminating about how bad your life got, seemingly overnight, why not get prepared for the worse? I’ll plan on commiserating with you this weekend, we can rent some videos and order pizza on Friday night. of course, what will happen is that the pizza will be late, and the tape from the Bubba’s Bait and Video Rental will have glitch in it, and to really ruin the mood, the interruptions all come at time when the plot was just getting exciting. Want to make this an even better image? You turn to your date, and that person is gently snoring. Now look, this isn’t you, and it’s not the end of the world. It’s just little planetary reminder that you need to cool off for a period of time. The early part of the week is fraught with exciting developments at work, so the same planets that brought you the good news are also suggesting that you take it real easy on the weekend. Turn your attention to getting some rest. Looks like your date will.

Aquarius : I like observing Aquarius people. They are always one step off from whatever most folks would call “normal,” and that makes Aquarius a particularly interesting case study. But this is a week when interesting case studies aren’t exactly what we should be focused on. And my fine Aquarius friends need to be a little more wary about anyone coming along with a great plan to get ahead. Remember that Mercury is retrograde, and while that won’t affect the Aquarius I know, it will have a somewhat deleterious effect on the rest of us. Therein is the problem. Someone is going to pop up this week with a suggestion on how you can make a lot of money. Or an improbable scheme for taking over the world. Or chance to amass a great deal of fame. What’s worse, this scam is going to look “bullet proof” to you. No matter how you turn it over in your Aquarius brain, this little idea looks like it could really work. If you can just put off making a resolute decision until later in the week, maybe put it off until next week, you might save both of us a lot of trouble. Since one of my private pleasures is fiction, when you get that proposal this week, drop it in an e-mail to me, we can both stand a good laugh as long as Mercury is doing his thing.

Pisces : I once met an Pisces who was so in tune with other versions of reality that she appeared to be almost translucent in form and shape. Of course, it might have been the dress or the hat she was wearing, something that belonged to another time and another place, like a mythological place where women are partially draped in diaphanous gowns, and bare bodies are not a problem, where form and function are all an art. “Yeah, so what’s that got to do with this week, buddy boy fishing guy?” Late in the week, as Mars moves out of Virgo, you’re going to notice that you drawn to some sort of “other reality.” I’ve tracked this systematically, and I know that your dream world will appear real. Or the real world will appear dreamy. One way or another, you’re going to be swept away with a momentary confusion where the two worlds collide, and it’s like entering another dimension. If this were to happen to anyone else, other than a Pisces, there would be ominous music in the background. But there won’t be. It’s not bad, but you might want to do something to gently ease yourself back into the reality that the rest of us subscribe to. Too much time daydreaming this week can lead to, uh, too much time day dreaming. Maybe it’s not so bad.

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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