I’d like to order a refill

Austin isn’t the only place with weird stuff. My home phone rings, I grab it. “I’d like to order a refill.” “Sure,” I answered, “what am I refilling?” “This isn’t a pharmacy?” How to answer such a question. Come on, this has happened before. Dial the right number. Or listen to me have some fun, at the caller’s expense. Too bad (statute of limitations notwithstanding) I lost my amateur pharmacology rating years ago — then I could have some real fun. Dave Barry still has the best “year in review.” I’m pretty sure a lot of folks really don’t get my twisted sense of humor. I was setting up the ads for next week, and I decided to run two items next to each other, one ad is for a credit card, and the other ad is for a debt consolidation company. I figure I can get the clicks, either way. After spending so much time empathizing with females, I decided I would try the hot bath thing, last night. A little soft music (Wagner), some oils and potions in the bath water, and, to top it all off, a cigar. The cold weather, though, that makes the hot water in the tub go cold pretty quick, I only lasted about half a cigar. Besides, the phone kept ringing. That’s another reason not to take baths — the phone. Can’t get it when I’m in the shower.