For the week of: 5/21-27/2001
“My words fly up, my thoughts remain below.
Words without thoughts never heaven go.”
Hamlet [III.iii.97]
Some folks, we’re not naming signs here, but you know who you are, some folks have suggested I’ll never go to heaven. Could be my vocabulary on the boat lately, that could have a lot to do with it. This Mars thing is not making us happy. Last week, there was trivia question about the title, “Hell on Wheels.” I was reading Nothing Like it in the World, and it cited the first time that phrase was coined was an allusion to the camp full of sharks, gamblers, and prostitutes that followed the edge of the railroad as that first transcontinental route was built. If ya’ll like to support this web site, then there are variety of options, unlike “Hell on Wheels.” Order up a report. Buy a T-shirt. Or hit the PayPal donate button. Somebody has to pay for the server, you know.
Aries: I was doing my thing, working along the shoreline of the inner city lake, trying to get in a little fishing time, and more just killing time rather than working. I had a chance to observe a couple of local soccer boys play some pretty mean ball. Now, they were playing on a section of park, along the shores of the lake, and this grassland angles up at a pretty good tilt. And since it was only a pick up game of ball, it really didn’t matter that they spent half their time running up and down hill, chasing the ball. Against odds like that, the cliché uphill battle, it would seem daunting. But careful observation, revealed that at least two of the players understood the angle of the playing field, and these two characters were using this is in a good way, putting a spin on the ball, so to speak. So this week is like an East Austin soccer field, one with a definite tilt to it. The playing field isn’t level, but if you take that into account, you’ll find you can win — adjust for your local conditions.
Taurus: I was in a sandwich store the other day, and the person behind the counter called me “Sir.” Not like, “Sir Kramer,” which is a fairly common affectation foisted on me, but it was more like, “Yes sir,” acknowledging my order. This is not a happy state of affairs — it implies that I’m starting to look like a member of the establishment. Sooner or later, and probably this week, you’ve got someone who will do the same thing to you. You’re standing there, minding your own business, and the person hails you as either a “sir” or a “ma’am.” Around here, it’s consider a point of courtesy to include such terms, but there’s a difference between social oil, a little grease for the conversation, and an intonation which suggests you’re an old fogey. Just get me a rocking chair, right? When you’re faced with this situation, the best way to deal with the insouciant and impertinent youth is to strike them once with your cane. I tired to, but the counter was too high — couldn’t get to the kid. Instead of striking out, consider this quaint lesson as a chance to show some of your mature choices — you’re going to need them this week.
Gemini: Happy birthday to my favorite Gemini’s. Ya’ll all know who you are. Saturn and the Sun make a fast pass at each other, and that’s going to exacerbate the situation already brewing. Instead of the term “brewing” which implies a gentle maturing process, I figure there is something else at work here, much less like a vat of beer, sitting there fermenting, and a lot more like a kitchen kettle, siting on the stovetop, just about to boil over. Now, if you’re like me, you can just get up and go to the stove, and turn down the heat. Or, if you let Saturn work on the Sun like this, and if you react in hasty manner, you might spill that boiling water all over yourself, the countertop, and just about everything. With Mr. Saturn, caution is a good word to use. A little restraint is order — that means move slower. Instead of leaping to conclusions, instead of jumping when you think it’s time to jump, examine all the possibilities first. Like that kettle that’s about to boil over due to Saturn’s heat (a little Mars thing figures in this, too), maybe it’s better to turn the fire down first, then move the kettle.
Cancer: In Shakespeare’s time, the Elizabethan era, acting was not a glamorous job — it was usually reserved for people without a decent background. It was a low bred occupation. And in a similar historical note, women were not allowed on stage — all the female parts were played by males dressed in drag, or young boys. Or both. What’s this got to do with Cancer right now? You’re getting called to play a part that is certainly beneath your dignity. You’re getting called to play a part that is most certainly below you. You might even have to bend the gender thing a little. Is this a problem? It would be for me, but I’m not claiming any Cancer in my chart this week. As much as you might want to forsake your sign, it’s not always possible. So when the role reversal situation pops up, remember that this is a temporary condition, and this is a situation that won’t last long, and as long as you can act, you’ll get paid for your performance. Easy for me to say.
Leo: I’d just like to suggest that you party on, party like it’s 1999 — sorry for the dated reference to decades old music, but you get the idea. It results from listening to too much classical music at Fishing Guide to the Stars Headquarters. This time frame, and everything which it entails, suggests that you are the center of attention, the way your Leo self likes it. Problems occur in a more intimate setting, little (usually stupid because it’s the other person’s fault) problems that all crop up. Instead of getting your Leo dander up, instead of pointing out where the other person is clearly at fault, and instead of taking it out on that person, in true Leo fashion, try something different — hold your tongue a bit. Don’t be bitter — leave that to a professional like myself. As long as you are the center of attention, even if one of the Leo detractors suggests that you are wrong about something, don’t let it ruin the mood. You know you’re right — I know you’re right — but let them figure it on their own — makes for a much happier situation.
Virgo: Nothing in life is ever black and white. Maybe some old photographs are, but usually, even the black and white stuff has had some color added in, something to brighten or darken the spots. Feel like that’s going on right now? Sure, there’s a persistent problem, but I’d like to suggest that this is not a clear cut issue. It’s not just black and white. It’s got a lot of sepia overtones to it. There’s some sort grayscale quality here. Instead of trying to render a decision right now, instead of trying to say one thing, for sure, one way or another, try for a more tactful middle ground. Mr. Sun himself, the old Sol, he’s in the sign of the Twins (Gemini) and he joins several other planets in the same place in the sky. This makes you want to give one, single, authoritative decision, one for sure answer, one definite yes or no, right now. While that’s a good idea, a strong “maybe” buys you a little time, and a little time is useful when trying to discern what’s a gray area, what’s got the sepia, and what is definitely black or white.
Libra: Ever put something down, forget where you left it, and have it miraculously appear in another part of the house? I have a friend with a pretty convoluted theory about the space – time continuum, but her theory goes a long to explain events like this. I know I left the one special Mystic Spook [it’s a fishing lure with magical powers and unheard of prowess — as a lure goes] with it’s hooks buried in the carpet at the front of the boat. But I go to garage, look in the boat, and there’s no lure. No fishing poles either. So I search the rest of the place, and finally, I come back to the garage, and there it is. Right where I thought it was in the first place, but when I looked there, it wasn’t there, not ten, fifteen, or even twenty minutes ago. Gremlins? Ghosts? Hobgoblins? Sorry, wrong time of the year for that excuse. A warp in time? That’s the most facile explanation. So when you misplace something, and it turns up right where you left it, don’t complain. That detour you took to find it might have some other interesting tidbits that get revealed. And don’t lose your cool over lost objects, not now — it’s not worth getting your blood pressure up just because you can’t seem to find what you’re looking for.
Scorpio: Trailer parks, especially one just like Shady Acres, is a tenuous place to live. There’s a terrible feeling of impermanence which goes with living in a pre-manufactured mobile dwelling unit. Mighty be the fact that some of the homes have wheels. Might be the fact that there is a high turnover in certain sections of the park. Might also be the nature of rent in this town. But there are corners of the park where it looks like a temporary living arrangement has become rather permanent. There’s this one old guy, been here for as long as I can recall, and some of the older residents suggest he was here before anyone else. He might have even been a settler, for all we know. He’s a cantankerous old coot, just what I want to be when I grow up one day. There’s a lot of Scorpio in this image, this old guy camped out for 30 years or more in one place. It was supposed to be a temporary solution, but it’s gotten a little set in its ways. Then something happens. I doubt the old guy is leaving any too soon, but in the Scorpio section of the sky, something, which started out as a temporary replacement, has gotten ingrained, and it doesn’t feel like it’s moving any time too soon. Here’s a hint: Mars might motivate you to change something right now — don’t be afraid of change. That other resident here, he finally fixed his air conditioner. None too soon, if you ask me.
Sagittarius: Mr. Mars is one culprit right now. In straight talking terms, he’s retrograde in the tropical zodiac sign of Sagittarius. Bodes no good. In other ways of looking at things, it’s like a little section of the hike and bike trail I frequent — it’s under construction. Now, what a tall skyscraper has to do with the lush trail along the edge of the river, it’s a bit of a stretch to see the connection. But there is one. What used to be a riverbank covered with grass and bushes, a gaping hole suddenly appeared. The hole had something to do with the recent construction. That’s what Mars, doing his backward swing, is about to do. Just when you thought you had a comfortable route all selected, there’s a sudden change you notice — sort of like the the trail which isn’t in the same place it was in yesterday. What was solid ground is now a gaping hole. You can bemoan your fate, cuss the developers and city fathers, or you can pick an alternate route, around the construction mess. No matter what you do, progress seems to march on. You can either accommodate this change, or you can get upset over it, but in either case, you’re going to have to reroute your journey. I’m just letting you know that there might be a hole today, where you had a solid path last week.
Capricorn: There’s a certain amount of clean up which needs to be attended to right now. I would suggest gardening. Of course, I live in a trailer so I don’t really have a garden exactly, but I do have a small porch-like structure, and on this structure I have a number of potted plants. There’s some mint from Pa Wetzel real garden. A little rosemary, some Mexican Heather, and the usual amount of vines, even some jasmine creeping stuff. The mint loves sunlight and water, in almost equal proportions. Grows like a weed in the long days of the spring. But even this weed-like growth needs some occasional work. Like my mint, your own garden still needs some tending. And this is a good time to look after it. There is a little work that is required, and getting out and rooting around the flower bed, the potted plant at the office, or just about any similar activity bodes well for you. You’ve got something which demands your attention right now, and it’s been long overlooked. A little extra effort in your garden might just do the trick — wherever your garden is.
Aquarius: So what if a certain planet is doing his dead level best to make the other signs a tad uncomfortable right now? So what if there seems to be an evil portent in the heavens, at least for some? Any of this going to bother you? Only if you let it. There’s one too many good things lined up, and I’m back to the idea that you should can get just about anything you want, with any kind of bait, as long as you try. Get up a little earlier, get out to the lake before the sun is up, be the first one there. Be long gone from the boat ramp before anyone else even shows up. Motor off to a quiet spot and work with what you’ve got. You could almost catch anything, record size bass, for example, on a bare hook, if you just get there first. The fish is hungry, and he sees the flash of the metal hook, and he thinks it’s some kind of breakfast. The whole key, though, is getting up, getting out, and getting there first. Maybe you’re not usually the first one in the office, or at the lake, but right now, a little head start yields wonderful results, despite the other portents in the heavens.
Pisces: This is the perfect time to make a tragic misstep. This is the perfect time to say absolutely the most correct thing, at the worst possible moment. [Ask an expert on this topic — like myself.] This is the perfect time to open up your mouth and insert your foot, insert your foot so far, you would think you were chewing on thigh muscles. The nice thing about a guy like me, I can save you from creating this situation — just send me some money. There, all better now? So maybe you don’t want to solicit my expertise at time like this. I still suggest you watch what you say. There’s a nasty little bump in the Pisces road. It’s not a big “road hump” nor is it really going to knock the oil pan off the bottom of the Pisces’ truck. But you do need to slow down, and as long as all this stuff is trying to goad you into speaking before it’s your turn, all I can suggest is to slow it down. It makes for a much better week when you don’t have to say you’re sorry. And you can get out of this scenario by keeping your mouth shut. Remember that Mars is doing his backward tumble mix-up thing, and that means you don’t want to encourage the wrong actions now.
(c) Kramer Wetzel, 2000, 2001
