“We are not all alone unhappy.”
Shakespeare’s “As You Like It” [II.vii.136]
Aries: Matter of fact, most of the Aries folks I’ve talked to in the last couple days are pretty happy. Pretty “weirded out,” too. And that’s a quote from more than one of my usual, unnamed sources. Aries sources, I might add. MArs seems to be weighing in one last time, to sort of shake some things out, and I’m not sure that everyone of the Aries I’ve talked is entirely pleased with the results of having Mars shake them up. It seems like there is a some sort of thread here, a common sense of foreboding. Play the appropriate music, here. I was going to fool around with Neptune, and mention some of his attributes as the Big Dude of the Sea, but I’m not really too worried about him. But there is a nightmare, a common one, where there’s some sort of giant fish that comes up out of the lake and gobbles up the Aries fisher person. It’s like someone pushed the nightmare button on your already erratic sleeping patterns, and and you’re not sure what to do. I’d follow the lead of a particular entertainment writer, and turn those nightmares into cash via story telling. Not everyone wants to listen right, but there’s a tale or two to be told. Consider how you want to explain about these dreams you’ve been having as of late.
Taurus: You think you’ve got strange things happening in your place of employment? Try being a fishing Guide and doing a little astrology on the side, I’ll bet we can swap tales, and mine will be stranger than yours. Or maybe not, Not right now, no, your stories are getting stranger by the minute, and that’s just what’s going at work. On the home front, everything is quiet. Or it should be quiet. Usual disclaimers apply here, you know. But there is lots of unusual activity at your place of employment. I’ve got it easy; I can always take a spin around the lake in an empty boat, just to “Check a few spots out,” and I can call this work. Even though it looks like I’m just out motoring around, doing nothing. If you’ve got a job that allows this sort of freedom, then by all means, exercise that freedom. But if you’re lashed to a desk, in cubicle, or worse, to counter some place, then be prepared for some of the most bizarre stuff you’ve ever seen. There is an easy way to deal with this sort of strange stuff, too. It’s an expression, which should be phrased as a question, but it will come out as a statement, instead. “Oh, really.” Not, “Oh, really?” Got that? Try it for this week’s work weirdness.
Gemini: It’s not like the Gemini imagination needs any help, but your imaginary life, the one that goes on in your head? That imaginary life? You know the one. It’s going great right now. Regrettably, that’s going to have an adverse effect on your daily life, but that’s only for the next few days. Like this weekend, early next week, you get the idea, right? It’s like you checked out to that other world, the one you sometimes inhabit in your dreams, and you seem to have forgotten about the rest of us, stuck down here in the real world. I know, I know, every Gemini already has an active imagination. In fact, your imagination is usually a lot more interesting than either the real world or my imagination. And pedestrian as this sounds, leave a trail of breadcrumbs, maybe some string, carry a flare gun, a flashlight, something, so you can make your way back to us a little later. Unlike some folks, I’m not saying don’t dream. Heck, dream big. If you can dream it, you can be it. And the dreams are what carry you forward. While you’re at it, can you dream me up a couple of five pound bass?
Cancer: Lady Luck is a strange creature. Or call her Fortune. Either way, she’s a bizarre beast. She seems to pick her victims with no discernible design. She just flat out hits us when we least expect it. It’s not like she delivers a winning lottery ticket about the time the rent is due. That would be just way too convenient. No, she just doesn’t work like that. So when I invoke her name, and whether its Fortune, Lady Luck, or Fate, you know what she delivers is never delivered in an equitable manner. From my trailer’s patio, overlooking the lake, I’ve watched [through binoculars, of course], while enjoying a cigar, and I’ve seen two guys in the same boat, one of them, catching something every time he wets his fishing line, and the guy at the other end of the boat? He got crosswise with that luck thang, and he is getting more and more frustrated by the minute. Which one do you want to be? And which one are you, really? Luck’s a funny old thang. Getting irritated with the way the odds are falling at the moment is not a good idea. That one guy in the front of the boat? You know what happened, eventually? He caught himself a catfish, so big, so onerous, and frankly, so ugly, it was on the front page of the sports section of the paper. Now, how’s that for luck? don’t get upset just because you’re not lucky right this very minute, Fate is cooking up something special.
Leo: Aren’t you the lucky one? You should be, anyway. There’s just the oddest bit of stuff going on, and it all adds up to things being good for the mighty Leo. Ever notice than some folks seem to forget that you’re the best sign in the zodiac? Now, instead of calling attention to this fact, as long as certain planets are arrayed where they are, I’m suggesting that you keep this apparently little recognized fact all to yourself. I know it, and you know it, and that’s all that matters at this point. Shoot, even my cat knows that you guys are the best — I would suggest that it it’s obviously a feline sentiment, but now we’re up to three of us who all think you’re the best. So, you’ve got the oddest bit of stuff going on, and you want to let everyone know about it, and my suggestion is that this is the perfect time to keep quiet. It’s a challenge, of sorts, but you get the idea. So let the good things happen, but don’t try and announce it to the world.
Virgo: You don’t feel much like playing right now, but over the next few days, as we work our way through the weekend, the idea of a nice party becomes increasingly more important. Work hard, play hard. Truth be known, I’d rather just follow some of my advice instead of all of it, and I’ll just play hard. But the weekend offers you some interesting work related advancements, and they appear to be too good to pass up. And then, next week, you get a chance to play when everyone else is working. I’m sure there’s at least one special Virgo who’s going to let me know that I’m all wrong about this timing thing, but other than that one, the rest of ya’ll, be prepared for an upside down spin to the next few days. A little delay is inevitable, it’s as if no else is on your perfect Virgo schedule. No one else seems to time their events, desires, needs, and demands on your time quite right. Not at this point. But soon, very soon, it will all work out better than you expect. Like starting on Monday. Or Tuesday.
Libra: No matter how hard you try, there always seems to be that one remaining detail that so effectively escapes your grasp. No matter what you do, there is always one last little item on your check list of things that have to be done before [insert some arbitrary deadline here], and it never fails, there’s always one step, one part of the process, one little thing that gets overlooked. The way it worked for me, I’ve got this handheld electronic digital organizer thing, and it synchronizes with my computer, and that computer has all the records. Or, if I’m out, I use the handheld digital thing to write down the appointment, note, task, and then all that data is crammed back into the computer, the next time I hook it up. Work great in theory. The problem is, and I’m sure you’re going to encounter something just like this, the problem being, if you don’t do the the little synchronization thing, if you write something done one place, but forget to update the list, then the task gets overlooked. MAke sure you’re double checking everything right now. That one little thing you really don’t want to forget stands a really good chance of being forgotten until it’s almost too late. I’m just trying to remind you ahead of time, that’s all.
Scorpio: Look into your lover’s eyes, and see if you don’t detect a greater degree of compassion, understanding, even a deeper depth of understand? Can you detect all that? Best I can say is, “It was worth a try.” I looked into my trusted companion’s eyes, and she looked back at me, then she meowed plaintively, wondering where her breakfast was. Before long, you and me, Scorpio and astrologer, cheek to jowl, we’re going to be dealing with your relationship issues. And then, your partner will be doing more than wondering where breakfast is. But until we get to that point, there’s a little bit of work leftover, and it’s up to you to get this stuff done. There’s an old stray Tom who comes wandering around Shady Acres Trailer Park, and he makes his presence felt whenever I bring a little bit of my fishing work home with me. Nothing is worse than trying to clean a fish while a suddenly affectionate cat tries to work his way in and around my legs, purring loudly. To make matters worse, remember that I already have one pet companion of the feline sort, a persnickety and devout female. Those two don’t get along together too well — that stray and my girl — and the problem is made a lot worse by the attractive aroma of fish entrails. Sounds like a recipe for a cat fight, and if you’re not careful, you can inadvertently touch one off, all in the name of work. Be careful what you do with your favorite companion’s attention. Soon, there will be compassion. But in the meantime, be careful.
Sagittarius: Get prepared. You’re feeling rather good about yourself, and while I don’t know what your personal best is, I’m pretty sure you’ve gotten to a point where your personal best stands a good chance of reaching a new a high. Last Labor Day weekend, there was something that happened, and it’s back to haunt you a little. Maybe it’s not all bad, if I recall, it was a fishing tournament, and I did pretty good. Didn’t win, but the haul was respectable, even by my clearly Texan standards (Texan standards are subject to hyperbole). The deal is, the Sun was in Virgo then, and the Sun is in Pisces now, and you’ve seen another birthday come and go, and you’re into a new year, and all that stuff. It’s time to stop long enough to make an assessment about where you are, where you’re going, and where you’ve been. And then, there’s something from that competition last summer/fall, and it requires your attention right now. I know one Sagittarius girl who will read this and bemoan her fate. But the rest of us ought to be enjoying ourselves a little. It’s not all bad. In fact, we get a positive push from Mars, and we can take this to reach a new high point, the Zenith of some action, and yes, it all works out pretty good. I was just looking at last Labor Day, and for the life of me, I can’t remember what lures I was using. But I will check through my notes, as those very devices used last year hold a key to immediate success.
Capricorn: My cat is a little strange. Or, according to some folks, my cat is a lot of strange. She’s a bit picky about the folks she’ll greet in the trailer. There are some people who come by for a reading, and the cat takes off at the first sound of the truck tires crunching on the gravel, and she is nowhere to be seen (hiding under the bed). Other folks, she bolts when she hears the knocking on the trailer’s door. Finally, with certain characters, she doesn’t hide, but makes herself perfectly at home with these people, to the point of begging for attention, and trying to sit in the folks’ laps. As an astrologer, I’ve watched this, and the Capricorn’s do best with my cat. Don’t ask me why, it could be that most astrologers categorize Cap’s as being aloof, cold and distant, like a cat. Could be some Capricorn in the cat’s chart. Could be a lot things. I just report what I’ve observed. And I don’t hold with the thought that Capricorn’s are cold, distant and aloof. My cat warms up to them nicely, and I’ve always considered her to be a good judge of character. Go with the ones who like you right now. The folks who find you cold, distant and aloof? They can all go hide under the bed. Stick with the folks who make you purr, and you’re week is a lot better off. By sometime next week, just about everyone will be purring at your copious Capricorn attention.
Aquarius: It wasn’t so long ago, like just a week or two, that everything in Aquarius was getting torn up. It was one thing, right after another, systems all falling apart at the seams. Computers doing strange things, significant others acting in significantly insignificant ways, and no one was paying attention to what you thought was most important. It was almost like there was a little bit of Chaos Theory at work in your world, and maybe not in a way you really enjoyed it. Now the trauma is subsiding, the chaos is settling down, and there’s a persistent buzz in your ear. It’s like a mosquito, and they’ve been breeding fiercely around here, trying to get a in a few good bites before the summer sets in. And like that mosquito, you can hear the buzz, but you can’t seem to catch the little guy. But this is small irritation compared to what you’ve had recently. This is a minor complaint. The big stuff is all starting to sort itself out, and, to me, it looks like it’s starting to sort itself out in a good way. It’s going to take some work on your part, but it’s all mostly good. Except for that obnoxious buzz from the bug. Keep this in perspective, Aquarius perspective, that buzzing in your ear is minor critter, not a major problem.
Pisces: Birthday’s have this affect on people, and no where is this more easily visible than right now, in the best little fish sign there is: Pisces. You feel great. You look like roadkill that’s had a chance to ripen for a while. But you feel great. Part of this is due to the party, or parties, or, at the very least, the party like atmosphere you’ve been enjoying. One of the reasons I’m primarily a writer is so that my clientele doesn’t have to actually see me, first thing in the morning. Or, on days like you’re having, my clientele doesn’t get to see me at all. The problem here is that you really want to get out and continue to play. Maybe it’s not a problem for you, but some of the people you encounter might be a little worried about your haggard appearance. I understand, I know you feel wonderful. And I’ll be extra nice to all my Pisces friends. But you might want to consider hopping in the shower before you leave the house. You might want to consider a little extra time spent attending to personal hygiene. Like I’ve suggested from the get go, you’re supposed to b feeling wonderful, and my advice is simple, bring the outside up the the inside’s same level, or, at the very least, make some kind of an effort to do so. And the result, if you follow my suggestion? Everyone will want to join in and help you celebrate your birthday some more.
