Last Friday night, I was in Maria’s Taco Express, a marginally legendary place where the food is excellent, plentiful and inexpensive. I call it marginally legendary because, for one, it hasn’t been around all that long, and two, if the word ever really got out, then they’d be slammed all the time.
Going up to the counter, there’s big, hand-lettered sign, “Anatomy of a perfect customer” with twelve or fourteen bullet points, items like, “Don’t mumble” & “have cash ready” as well as a bunch of similar notes.
Nothing works better than theft of an idea, and I started thinking about such a list for this site. But what does make for the best user-astrologer interactions?
Working for a top ten, not sure how this will go:
1> Keep it short. “Brevity is the soul of wit” And that quote is quite funny, when taken in context. It’s one my favorite misused, misunderstood bits in Shakespeare’s canon, in Hamlet, where Polonius just won’t shut up. Good advice, too bad the character can’t follow the advice himself. As the queen suggests, “More matter with less art.” Or as I say, “keep it short.”
2> Identify yourself. Maybe a half dozen buddies I recognize by their e-mail. Anyone else? Think about it. I get what appears to be an anonymous e-mail from some address I’ve never seen before, and I’m supposed to realize that your really cute [AOL, Hotmail, & etc.> e-mail address is that person I talked to for hours yesterday? I’ve slept since then, I’m lucky if I know my own name, in fact, sometimes I have to check my wallet when I wake up, just so I know who I am.
3> Cash. Or a check. Or a credit card. Money gets my attention a lot faster than something really cute. Despite some detractors, I really like PayPal.
4> Take notes. When you come to me for a reading, be prepared. You’ve got questions, I’ll do my best to answer those questions in English. I can get very technical [astrology technical jargon, \\i.e.\\, astro-babble> or I can keep it in the vernacular. You make the call. But get all your questions down before, make notes, be prepared. You’ll get a lot more out of me. The more specific the question, the more details you provide, the better the answer.
5> Problems with the website? What version of software are you using? Wait, I don’t care, but more than 50% of America is on broadband access, if you believe what you read; therefore, it’s your job – not mine – to insure you know how to operate your software. We make code that works on anything current; you have to run your stuff yourself. N.B.: older versions of Netscape’s browser don’t properly render some pages. Think: upgrade. Netscape, version 4 has a 1994 copyright. Think about that. Time on the Internet is like dog years.
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10> “Your web page sucks. You suck.” Thanks for the sentiment. Where can I see your work on the web? And please, where can I read some of your scintillating printed word? Send me a link to your stuff; if you’re superior, I might learn how to be better by studying your work.
