For the Week of: 6/5-11/2003
“Things past redress are now with me past care.”
Shakespeare’s Richard II [II.iii.170]
Coming up soon: a quick trip to El Paso, always a favorite desination, although, it’s going to b a bit odd this time. It’s that “tail-end of the eclipse” energy. It’s a strange, free-range energy that’s present, not sure just which way’s up. But it is getting better.
Gemini: One of my buddies is particular about his cell phone etiquitte. He won’t take his phone into a restautrant, not even the sleazy dives we prefer, because, in his words, “It’s just not right.” He might not be right either, given the companionship he keeps. As much as I hate the little things, I like my “boat phone.” It’s come in handy on more than one occasion.
So, I was sitting in the truck, outside a friend’s apartment, one of those “gated communities,” and I needed the code to get in the gate. There are simple instructions on the speaker box itself, “dial the apartment number you want to reach,” and they will buzz you in. But with a cell phone, it’s just a lot easier to call the person and ask for the code.
This is both a problem, and a solution. Let’s look at this in terms of the Gemini chart. Read the instructions. Dial the apartment number; let them buzz you in. Or, you can complicate this arrangement, and use your Gemini cell phone. You make the call, but one requires three steps, and the other just requires you to punch in an apartment number.
Cancer: I was watching a friend work her horse. Nice mare, pretty markings, a little psychotic because there was some Arabian blood in that mare, but basically a well-behaved horse, as horse behavior goes. The biggest problem? Me. I know next to nothing about how to handle a skittish mare. I know even less about handling a skittish female of the human variety; however, I’m sure there’s some familiar ground here.
To be of assistance, what I did, while she worked that horse in the pen? I sat on the rail of the fence. I should’ve had a cowboy hat on, look the part even better, but I was wearing a baseball hat. Sandals hooked under the rail, but I lacked either a straw or some chew to perfectly achieve the role of being a cowboy. That horse didn’t seem to be learning very much, as she kept making the same mistakes over and over. Kind of like her owner, a little obstinate about some things.
Kind of like some of the stuff going on with dear Cancer’s these days, a little reluctant to perform the prescribed routine? Feel like someone’s leading you around on a rope, got a bit tucked into your mouth? A little metal to chew on, a lead rope forcing you to do something you don’t want to do? While I’m amused, sitting on that top rail, watching the events, you can fight with this, kick and buck, refuse to follow the lead set by Saturn, or you can let your handler, your own personal Horse Whisperer, show you what to do.
Leo: “Don’t insult her dog.” Me and a friend (any bets on his name? Bubba? You think?) were talking about this on a lazy summer afternoon, beating the heat on the patio on of a local dive. My friend, she’s got a dog. Her dog is dumb as a stump. My friend knows this. Still, in my efforts to be politically correct, my reaction is always, “Yes, but that dog could hunt.” The canine companion was sitting the shade with us, tongue hanging out, a sloppy, makeshift water dish dribbling foam everywhere, the dog was just about as happy as could be.
The occasional passerby would stop and comment on how good-looking the dog was. Might have been a purebred, if someone hadn’t lost the paperwork. Whatever you do, especially around here, don’t insult her dog. Never mind both the dog and the owner are fully aware of the obvious fact that the dog is stupid, even as dogs go. It is not in the interest of good communications to offend that canine companion. As the weekend gets here, as next week starts, think about this simple advice, consider it from my point of view, “Don’t insult her dog.” Besides, just how stupid is that dog? Getting table scraps, got a water dish, getting love and attention? Maybe that dog isn’t so stupid.
Virgo: Much to my dismay, I just discovered that one of the new residents here in Shady Acres is a Virgo. In true Virgo fashion, she cleans houses for a living. I thought about hiring her to do my place, but then, I’d have to come up with some extra cash to pay her. That’s a problem.
See: some of the best ideas, some of the most wonderful concepts become quite clear in the next couple of days. Or, like me, you discover that you have a perfect Virgo neighbor. That’s always good news. The problem, then? The “paying” part. Coming up with the cash. That’s sort of difficult. And you know, it’s not a good idea to contract a Virgo to work for you unless you are willing to properly recompense said Virgo.
Flip this around to what your chart looks like these days. It’s not a good idea to whip out the old plastic charge card unless you’re absolutely sure that you can pay for what it is that you’re ordering. Fortunately, you’re Virgo self will discover that I do offer certain inexpensive options on the web site. But not everyone is as willing as I am to accommodate your Virgo self these days. Go easy on the spending spree — make sure you’ve got it before you spend it.
Libra: The early June nights in Austin are perfect for sitting on the veranda. I prefer the patio at a nice restaurant where a cool libation is served, the open-air filled with bugs and bats darting in the night’s sky, and listening to the ongoing discussion.
One Libra lad was making a point about relationships, and I found it rather interesting, “Hey, maybe he was doing her a favor, you know, maybe he didn’t love her, and maybe this all for the best.” Who knows? From the comment, it’s easy to surmise that the discussion centered around a relationship, a broken heart, love gone awry, and the relative abuse being heaped on an unnamed and not preset person. Like the good Libra that he was, the guy was just trying to offer a slightly different way of looking at the issue.
Okay, see, look: you can offer a unique perspective. The point is, though, you might want to be a little more careful about offering up your different way of seeing an issue. I know you’re right; matter of fact, I was behind that Libra guy all the way. What’s going on, astrologically speaking, though, you’ve got to be careful that you don’t alienate a lot of your audience in the way you make your very valid point.
Scorpio: One of my buddies, goes by the unlikely surname of “Bubba,” oddly enough, was recounting a tale about an after work drink. Bubba works construction, although, not much lately.
“So [name removed for propriety’s sake] has a new baby. Ever see his wife? No? Anyway, last Friday, we all went to the bar after work. He used my phone, called home, and said he’d be home with his paycheck — by 7:30, this was about 4 in the afternoon. Been really hot lately; that sun’s a burner. So anyway, around 9, the door to the bar swings open. Silhouetted against the door’s frame, a dark figure. It’s his wife. I’ll swear I heard that lonesome song from the Clint Eastwood early westerns, you know that tune? She’s got the baby on one hip. [No name] looks up, says one word. She marches over to him, punches him right in the forehead. I’m not kidding. He’s out like a light. She then dragged her man off, threw him on the back of the truck, and took him home.”
1] If you think the men in Texas are tough, you should the girls around here. 2] Don’t ever mess with a new mom. 3] Scorpio: if you say you’re going to do something, then let me reiterate the point of the story: do what you say. 4] If he doesn’t come home on time, I’ll bet you know exactly where that bar is.
Sagittarius: Lucky Sagittarius. Or maybe, these days, unlucky Sagittarius. Numerous folks will be telling you just how good things are. I’m not one to disagree with mainstream astrological influences, or what the so-styled “masters” suggest, but you know, I have to take a little exception here.
Could be because I’m little more bitter. Could be because last week wasn’t exactly that great. Could be a lot of things. The way you handle problems is what’s the important thing. I was working the Fishing Guide to the Stars “Help Desk & Friendly Customer Service” phone line. After a couple the usual complaints, diatribes, and long lists of what I’m doing wrong, I tend to get a little bitter. Or, as one Bubba says, “Bit her, bit him, too.”
The deal is, maybe you and me, our Sagittarius selves shouldn’t be in the front line of communication with “customer service” over the next couple of days. We all have this feeling: “I want attention — just not yours.” Maybe it’s a good time to lose the cell phone for a couple of days, take a break from doing all the hard work of trying to communicate with people who don’t really want to listen.
Capricorn: I love my red-headed Capricorn friends. Or, I love most of them, anyway. Matter of fact, I’m inordinately fond of Capricorn’s in general. I got an e-mail the other day, a slightly angry tone, “Just exactly what do have against Capricorn?” I wonder where this stuff comes from, on occasion. Something against lovely Caps? [Ruggedly handsome — whatever.] Hardly.
The deal is, your Cap self is going to be inclined to read something, watch something, eat something, and you’re liable to find it disagreeable. Before you fire up the e-mail hate machine, before you send of a torrid note about how the world is cruel to you, and how this one [event, person, place, dining experience] didn’t work out, and therefore, the world is a bad place, with everyone out to get decent Caps like yourself. That’s not the case.
Here’s a fishing tip: “chum.” Wait, see: I lost a lure the other day, you know, that lure cost $6.95 [plus tax]. Would’ve eventually made a good earring, too. “No man, you didn’t ‘lose a lure,’ it’s like chum, you know, leaving a little extra for the fish to feed on.” You’re not losing a situation, you’re not really experiencing a setback, it’s matter of how you view the disagreeable event. It’s like a token to the gods of fishing or something.
Aquarius: It’s an old slogan, T-shirt, bumper sticker expression from my days of racing fast motorcycles, and it’s a term I’ve always been endeared to, “If you haven’t seen God, you’re not going fast enough.” Let’s spin that expression around and use, in context, for the Aquarius chart these days. Mars is frying through your sign, and if you haven’t felt it, then you’re not going fast enough.
Either Mars is going to speed you up, or Mars is going to speed up stuff around you. Which will it be? I suppose, that’s sort of the question I’m posing to you, the Aquarius contingent. As things start happening faster and faster, spiraling out of control, think about that motor sport racetrack lore. Either you’re going to have to move a little faster, or we’re going to have to move a little faster to keep up with you, but either way, the options include going faster as a part the solution.
Pisces: At one time, I spent a lot of time on the “Hike & Bike” trail. As a walker, not as runner or biker, I get a chance to observe people. One of the most common types on the trail is the “bicycle nazi.” Terrible appellation, and worse yet, a terrible hog of good trail space. The “bicycle nazi” blazes along, not paying too much attention to the surroundings, legs furiously pumping away. I’ve always been tempted to throw an elbow out, but I’m afraid I’d lose an arm that way.
What’s even funnier, though, is to see one of the bicycle enthusiasts furiously pumping away, and to see a companion, usually of the opposite gender, trying vainly to keep up. Sweat drenched brow, not altogether appropriate attire, fleshy body part flailing away, trying to keep pace with the demon maniac in front. Uranus turns retrograde soon enough, Mars is still kicking in your solar 12th House, so which one are you? The one setting the pace? Or the one trying to keep up? Knowing my Pisces charts, and knowing Mr. Mars, it really looks like you’re in that second place slot right now. Persevere, dear Pisces, you’ll catch up with the target soon enough.
Aries: Ever get that feeling that stuff just keeps piling up everywhere you look? The ubiquitous “in” box is stuffed to over flowing? That’s when I borrow a page from Pa Wetzel’s book about dealing with superfluous incoming material: stacks.
I start with one stack, usually inbound paper mail, on the coffee table. Seeing as how this is a small trailer, that inbound stack is also resting on the dining room table. Then I can put a stack on the short, freestanding bookshelf. Then there’s the floor, but that’s a hazardous place to leave stacks of stuff that might, or might not be, important. So far, I’m up to three places to put piles of stuff that require my attention. I’m sure you’re with me, so far.
Now, during this weekend, instead of getting worked up over all this work look through just one of those stacks. Junk to toss, a few items that you can place on “needs my attention right now” stack, then one item that piques your curiosity, and see? Suddenly you’ve dealt with a lot of the problem effectively reducing your own load by one-third. Take one, small step for Aries, it will be giant step towards achieving the goals you’ve got set.
Taurus: Use it while you’ve got it, that’s my best suggestion. I was at an outdoor event, just another typical Austin, “party on the lawn” (park, avenue, wherever) event. It was a warm summer’s day. Technically, it was a spring day, and sure enough, one of the attendees showed up sans shirt. In other words, the female in question didn’t have a shirt, a blouse, or anything for that matter, adorning her chest other than paint. She did have a couple of strings of beads, but I guess that’s to be expected.
The body paint was strategic, though, one was light red (or pinkish) in hue, and the other was greenish. The body paint was artful enough so that it didn’t look like the festival attendee was actually topless. Not that topless would’ve been a problem, consider the surrounding environs, and most folks will note that it’s not a problem at all. If you’ve “got it” then paint it up and use it. I asked one older, slightly more mature lady what she thought, and I admitted that I stared. “Dude, that’s, like, what she wants you do. You’re not being rude.”
