Fishing Guide to the Stars
by Kramer Wetzel
(c) 2005, 2006
by Kramer Wetzel for astrofish.net
For the Week starting: 8.31.2006
“You are as a candle, the better part burnt out.”
Shakespeare’s Henry IV, part two (I.ii.148)
It’s the chief justice addressing good, old Falstaff. Then, there’s Bloom’s assertion that Falstaff is an archetype, in more or less words. Certainly one of my favorite characters, that’s for sure.
Aries: We’re getting oh so close, but we’re not there yet. However, that shouldn’t stop the party in the Aries world. It’s just that with the planets thusly arrayed, mostly, predominately, for better part, in Virgo, there’s still a hint of Virgo-like cleaning fluid, more like a smell, floating along in the Aries sphere. I’m thinking that this feeling — for an Aries — is like the scent of lemon-fresh (whatever) furniture polish. Actually, yes, I do use it myself. Great stuff. Spray a little on a rag, and wipe down the available surfaces. I’m not talking about a deep-cleaning kind of chore, I’m talking about taking thirty seconds to dust off the front of the bookshelf, or make a quick pass at exposed portion of the desk. It’s not a big deal, it’s a typical Aries hasty stab at minor clean-up and restructuring. Don’t get distracted, though, like I do, standing there in front of the bookshelf — “I’ve been meaning to reread that one text….” Watch out for distractions.
Taurus: There’s a certain strength ingrained in the Taurus psyche and build. A certain kind of resistance and at the same time, stability. Employ these qualities. Use them, as the week gets more frantic, and as the holiday weekend gets under way? Someone needs to have a cool head in the face of adversity. Here’s the upside, my fine Taurus friends shouldn’t be facing any undue adversity. Just the opposite, when cool heads are required, there’s a good chance the fine Taurus sensibilities can be used to help see a way through a problem, help smooth over a rough patch for some other sign. It’s not about your own troubles, it’s about helping out other people. This is where the secret to success, the way to help? Be cool, calm, and collected. All together. With the impending full moon, and with the stack up planets in Virgo, this all lends a certain degree of ability to Taurus types. This gives you a way to help other signs. This lends you strength. Use it. But use it wisely.
Gemini: If you would just sit down, shut up, and listen, for about two minutes of precious Gemini time, you’d learn something. The point is to get you to be quiet. A number of planets are making you highly excitable. The same planets are pushing you to talk, possibly talk over the person who is trying to help. If someone comes along and tells you sit down, shut up, and listen? I’d suggest you follow that advice. This is also going to piss off some of my Gemini buddies. True story: Bubba was in line for a promotion. Assistant manager at the beer store where he works. In his orientation session with the boss, Bubba neglected to listen to all the procedures. He then failed to follow some of the pre-ordained procedures. And when his check was docked for his over sights (under sights, really)? He complained loud and long, as befits a Gemini. Then the boss pointed out that if Bubba had just listened to the instructions, and followed them, there wouldn’t be this problem. So listen, when you have to. Might get you some extra money that way.
Cancer: Thursday, there’s usually a special at a local hamburger place. It’s not like this is really good food, but relatively speaking, it’s cheap grub, and the ambience can’t be beat. Sitting outside, under a sad awning that’s clearly seen better days, consuming a meal that’s got to be mostly grease, burger, fries, drink. Then, in the spirit of the summer, maybe a soft-serve cone afterwards? Problem was, I was — that Thursday evening — I was booked with work. So on the day before, Bubba calls, “Hey, how about Sandy’s Thursday?” Nope, I replied, can’t make it. Work. Thursday afternoon, Bubba calls again, “Hey, how about Sandy’s tonight?” Nope, still can’t make it. Sorry. Some people might get annoyed that Bubba didn’t listen the first time. But when I looked at your chart, with all that Virgo flavor, and the moon filling out past first quarter, I got to wondering about Cancer. Are you the one who gets the call, or makes the call? Annoyed or annoying?
Leo: I haven’t seen my resident Leo friend for the last few days, and once the official Leo birthday time was over, I didn’t expect to see her. As far as I can tell, she’s snuggled up under a blanket, in her trailer, with the AC cranked way down. Cooling off. Escaping. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was watching a lot of TV. Anything that is mind numbing, and done at home. Mind numbing, done at home, and in reality, doesn’t waste any brain cells. There’s much going on in the Leo mind, but there’s not much going on outside the Leo mind. Therein is the problem. And the solution? I’d hide out, like my neighbor, birthday parties are over, and it might be a good time to just curl up under blanket, although, I’m not sure that keeping the AC set that low will really cool off an ardent Leo. But it’s worth a try. Take it easy for the next few days, as next week promises to be back to its usual hectic pace.
Virgo: There’s a weird little arrangement, and it has to do with confusion and activity. To be sure, with Mars and Venus, plus the Moon and Mercury, all doing what they’re doing, there’s a ton of activity with Virgo, and for that matter, with Virgo related machinations. Virgo is more “Virgo-like” due to this influence. But there’s another, rapidly approaching planet arrangement that’s going to spread the seeds of disinformation. Going to confuse a certain issue. Going to confuse a lot of Virgo folks. This is an official, from the Fishing Guide to the Stars World Headquarters, warning: look out. I had a piece of bait left over from Gulf fishing, that would be bay fishing, and all I really wanted to do was a cast few times into the river. Instead of changing the bait or anything, I just tossed that salty, salt-water bait into the river here. To say I wasn’t expecting a bite is an understatement. My surprise proved my theory that bass will bite anything that even remotely looks like food, and that the fish here are too familiar with my tricks. So I hauled up a confused youngster, and I got thinking about that confusing influence in Virgo. Must’ve been a Virgo bass, biting one of my saltwater baits. My win, but much to the chagrin of the Virgo fish? Its loss. Careful with that confused state. Might wind up with a hook in your mouth. Again.
Libra: There’s a major line up of planets in Virgo. For most of my dear Libra folks, this isn’t good. Not good at all. Nothing I can do about that, either. There’s an eternal conundrum that I’ve used before, but it’s worthy of consideration again, given that all of the planets are stacked up against you, in the sign that precedes you: how can you do something for someone else and have that action really be for yourself? Selfless action that benefits someone else — some other sign — how can doing something for someone else benefit your Libra self? How does that work? While your wrestling with a question that I can’t answer, I might suggest that the idea of doing some good deed for another person, sounds a little preachy, a good deed for which your Libra self expects no reward, just such a selfless action might pay off. Might pay off bigger than you think, too. The approaching full moon, hits hard next week, before this scope is up, that just pushes this idea further along. Think about doing one good deed. Paybacks on it are great — but the real secret to success is to undertake this task with no expectations of a reward.
Scorpio: One of my neighbors has been working a construction job, as of late. Scorpio lad. To some, he might appear to be a redneck. Personally, I wouldn’t pass such a judgment. Just another working guy. The inherent problem with his current form of employment, though, the biggest and most troublesome source of ire is his buddy, no doubt, named “Bubba.” Most working mornings, unless there’s a holiday or a weather issue, there’s a solid honk of a horn, at 6:15 AM. Sharp. Could almost set a clock by it. The biggest problem for me is that the horn is right by my sleeping head. Some days, I can doze right through it, but in my dotage these late summer mornings, I’ve gotten to where I can’t really rest. Horn goes off, and it’s time to get up. You’ve got a similar situation. Or maybe you’ve got the same thing, but that would only apply to Scorpio folks living in a trailer park in South Austin. Consider it a wake-up call, a signal that it’s a good time to get up, get rolling, and be ready to hit the ground with your Scorpio feet pumping. We’re setting a pace here, and the earlier you get up and get after the goal, the better the chance of success. Personally, unless it involves a fishing pole, I prefer to sleep. However, I did get up one of those mornings when the Scorpio horn went off, and I did find myself with a few extra fish I wasn’t anticipating.
Sagittarius: This weekend holds a little surprise for you. For us. For Sagittarius. It’s not a big secret, or, to some, it may feel like it’s a big secret, but it’s not really that big of a secret. It’s like stumbling across the lyrics to an old and familiar song, and then discovering that you’ve misquoting the lyrics all along. Most of my friends expect such behavior from me. Makes it a lot easier on me, and my friends have lower expectations of my accuracy in transcribing lyrics, words and phrases. So that’s the big secret? Sure. Or it’s an example of the big secret, and what you finally get to find out. Now, there’s another component to this week, as well. It’s little frustrating, at times, that whole “everyone’s got a secret and I’m the only one who doesn’t know about it” thing? How you — we — deal with this frustration is what’s important. As I’ve alluded to, my friends expect me to be bit goofy at times, occasionally unwashed, not exactly unlettered, but not always the best informed. So I can slide out of the situation with a smile and a shrug. That’s the challenge, when confronted with the big secret, how to gracefully slide on out of there with a wry grin, and maybe, a gentle Sagittarius, “Oops.”
Capricorn: If I were more Capricorn, I’d advise myself to exercise a little bit of caution as this weekend approaches. After that? Throw caution to the wind. Hot sauce with Scofield rating of over 1,000 doesn’t bother me. Doesn’t offend my taste buds, as it’s better to burn out than fade away, I believe. But as the Capricorn weekend approaches, consider sampling, in a small way, the hot sauce of life. Test it, taste in small doses, in other words, exercise caution. Now, once we make it through this weekend? As the moon gets full? Consider doing what I like to do, take big bites. Life is like a smorgasbord, right? Go ahead and load that Capricorn plate of yours with all you want, as soon as Monday arrives. Just in time for the holiday? The planet’s comply. Weird how that works out for you this time.
Aquarius: I looked at your chart, and all I could think about was my perceptions of an earthquake. I haven’t ever been in one, so my understanding of the earth quaking beneath my feet might be different from what it really feels like. Then, there was the time the trailer shook so badly, I was sure I was in a real earthquake. Don’t laugh, portions of Texas have had earthquakes, however, that phenomena is usually associated with older old fields where the underground resources have been bled away, creating vacuum, and the earth settles. So it’s not really like an earthquake where the plates shift. In my case, though, it was just a long freight train, rumbling nearby, and the shaking was just some strange set of atmospheric conditions that amplified the 100 or more heavily-laden ore cars rolling by. This felt like it caused a shift in my trailer’s foundations, such as they are. Felt like, sounded like, seemed like an earthquake. I was sure the windows were rattling, not that really loud vehicle can’t do that, too, but I’m pretty sure it was just a train. When the perception of change rolls through your Aquarius chart, it’s time to consider what arrangements you’ve made, and what contingency plans you’ve got in place. Looks like there’s an extra day to the weekend coming up, make sure you have “earthquake preparedness” or whatever other plans, all in place.
Pisces: “OH Oh! Oh. They will rue the day they ever messed with me!” It was a Pisces friend, and she was going on and on about some issue at her place of employment. I was listening, but only with half of a heart, since I was munching on a burger. Cheap burger, keep that in mind, not fancy ten-dollar burger. My Pisces companion started to stab at the air with a French Fry, “I’m telling you, it will come down hard on them.” I can only imagine what kind of battering ram a French fry will make. Or sword. Right, that potato strip is deadly, especially in the hands of Pisces. I’m sure the offending party is quaking with fear. It’s all about dramatics. Drama and its close cousin, trauma. I understand that it’s a traumatic situation. I understand there’s been an egregious wrong perpetrated here. I also know that your Pisces self is on the side of Right, Truth, Justice, and blah-blah-blah. While I’m a sympathetic ear right now, so to speak, I’m not sure everyone wants to listen to how you’ve been pilloried and vilified. After we get done with the full moon? When the Moon gets past its fullest point and starts to shrink? That’s when “just desserts” will be served. Can’t hurry this process of the bad guys getting caught. Until then? Mighty French Fry sword?
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copyright (c) 2005, 2006 Kramer Wetzel, for astrofish.net
