For the Week starting: 11.23.2006

Fishing Guide to the Stars
by Kramer Wetzel
(c) 2005, 2006
by Kramer Wetzel for
For the Week starting: 11.23.2006

“If one be mad, or hang or drown themselves, there they go — Jupiter bless us!
Shakespeare’s The Two Noble Kinsmen [IV.iii34-5]

It’s officially Sagittarius now! Plus, and this is good news, I hope, Jupiter is in Sagittarius!

Aries: I was downtown, along the edge of the bar district. There were radio promo banners from three different stations, three different bars, going to be a busy night? Seemed that way. One place was county. Another was “adult urban contemporary,” whatever that is. And a third seemed to be a old-school rock-n-roll. There was a fourth ad, for a station I’ve never heard of, with exciting promotions in Spanish. Looks like a busy night in the bar district. Which one to attend? In reality, I’ll be at none of the places. But like that crowded bar district, and like me, watching the interns string up the banners, there’s a growing sense of anticipation. There’s a party going on, someplace, and you might want to think about going. Might want to consider getting out. But which one? Hip-hop, old school? Conjunto? Tejano? Hard rock? Adult Urban County Contemporary? Alt-something, which sounds like pop? There are a number of banners, advertising, really, and it’s all drawing your attention. Pick one, out of the multitude. Just one, really.

Taurus: Change is good. Change is occurring. Pressure from Mars, still opposite you is present, as is the Mercury push. It’s so odd, when this happens like this, there’s a twin influence, and no, this isn’t some weird Gemini reference, but the two influences that are pushing on the Taurus psyche? At the same time, you can see a path clear to your destination, and there’s also a single, rather big, obstacle (probably appears insurmountable) blocking your way. Plus, I guess this goes to the third influence, so it’s not a twin, but it’s in the same vein: excited and worn at the same time. Lots of energy, first thing, but first a good nap. But then, you’re not sleepy. Coming and going. Can’t make up your mind, either. At one point, though, you’re going to be forced, or so it seems, to hit it. Even though you’ve been working towards that one goal, and even though it looks like there’s still a problem with achieving the desired goal, I’m sure something will start work. The point is patience. And focus. As I’ve implied, there’s a way you can see the solution, but that remedy seems to evade your grasp. If you can focus that Mars-energy, inspired by Mercury, or whatever, there’s a chance to get a grip on the problem, and then, there’s a good chance that you can win. Patience and focus, and both are in short supply.

Gemini: “If all else fails, SAVE THE BEER!” It’s a command; it’s a response to as tragic situation. While I seriously doubt that true tragedy is lurking in the Gemini corner, there’s nothing like a little panic to help move life along. I also realize that you could do with a little less panic, but one item I’ve discovered about most Gemini folks is that a little panic goes a long way to improving Gemini disposition. A day without a certain amount — possibly manufactured — drama is just a complete loss. And if there’s no real sense of urgency, then matters at hand usually don’t get dealt with in a typically efficient Gemini fashion. So there has to be an element that evokes some kind of panic. Nothing like a little holiday cheer to do that, right? Could be worse, could be a real emergency, but I’m hoping I’m wrong about that. However, there will be a system failure occurring someplace close to the Gemini corner. Again, I doubt this is right on top of you, but it’s a close call. When everyone else seems to be headed into that panic mode, a simple command, like I started with? That might help. Might put some of the purported tragedy in perspective. Don’t hesitate to quote me.

Cancer: The ad read: “No payments until next year!” I thought about it. First, “next year” is less than 6 weeks away. So it’s just barely a month’s grace period. Second, is it really a good deal? When I was first looking at the Cancer chart, what I kept thinking about was “go for it,” and “it” can be whatever it is you want. But as I dug a little deeper, I found I wanted to temper that idea of just going for it, and get a little consideration worked in. Holiday madness is infectious, and like a plague, it gets to everything and everybody. Even a normally rational Cancer person will be moved towards shopping extravagances. Not that it’s bad, either, just that pesky fine print, the part that you really don’t want to pay attention to? That’s what I’m worried about. Well, I’m not worried about it, but I’m concerned for the dear little Cancer folks who succumb to misleading — albeit not out-right lies — advertising. Read all the details before going for something that’s too good to be true. If that’s the case? It usually is too good to be true.

Leo: There are a couple of images I captured. One was with a cheap, disposable camera. Another was with a phone-camera. Just meandering and occasionally entertaining visual pointers, sometimes signs, sometimes, just a picture of a single flower bud. What I was thinking about, though, those images live on my site, sometimes, but in other cases, like that disposable camera? I had that “developed” onto a CD. So I’ve got, in theory, a hard copy of it. Images printed on paper? I don’t’ have many of those, in fact, none that I can think of. Consider the living space that I’ve got, and a whole slew of photo albums would take up too much space. I’ve got a couple of pictures hanging on the wall, but other than the requisite “black velvet Elvis,” there’s not much here. I was considering the ephemeral nature of the digital images, plus, with at least two of those images, true classics, if you ask me, the sign, the source of the image itself? Gone. So the digital images are all that remain, forever and in perpetuity. To be sure, I’ve got a back-up of the files, but still, it’s all rather, well, almost like magic. And one good problem, like natural disaster, could wipe it the files. There’s a point in the Leo life, too, like my images, that you want to maintain a permanent record of, a single spot, perhaps it’s even images. Maybe it’s something else. Consider the transient nature of what you’re dealing with, as well, and consider that, for starters, it’s time for a back up. Then also consider some other way of making this transient point more permanent.

Virgo: I ran into an old flame last week. Maybe “flame” is too strong of a word. More like, a young lady I was once attracted to? Been a year or more since I’ve last seen her. She’s gained some weight, but it’s filled her out some, and she doesn’t look so, for lack of better words, she didn’t look so skanky. Her face was filled out, and she looked lovely. Hair coloring was gone, no mystic shading there, just all-natural brunette. Plus, more than ever before, she had a healthy glow. Oddly enough, even though she was much more attractive in a conventional sense, with a little more fleshed-out flesh, and a little less skank appeal, I found her less appealing. The “bad girl” factor was gone. Clothes were clean. Face was fresh-scrubbed. Eyes bright. What I was thinking, though, as Virgo is concerned, is similar kind of a situation. You’re certainly happy to meet an old hearth-throb, but there’s something wrong, too. Cleaned up and filled out? By the strictest of standards, that should be more appealing. But like me, caught in a contradiction, there’s something missing. Perhaps there’s an edge that can’t be determined. The way the planets line up for Virgo, though, there’s a sudden realization coming along. Take time to put it in perspective.

Libra: As is my style, I’d inquired as a to a certain barista’s birthday. Her reply? “I’m on the cusp, between Libra and Scorpio, honestly, I think I’ve got the worst of both signs.” Not sure I followed that, and since another customer wandered in off the street, I had to cut our conversation short. So I was wondering about this one person, and I wondering about what she said, “worst of both signs,” and does that mean she’s unsure whether to get even or not? Or how to extract retribution when it is deserved? My mind started to have fun with this idea, the “worst of both signs,” comment, what would be the worst of Scorpio & Libra? Not knowing when to get even? At the worst possible moment, only when decisive action is truly called for, freezing with a Libra minute of indecision? Or, whipping that Scorpio “Tail of Justice” around to sting someone, only to discover that worst Libra nightmare, you got the wrong person? I couldn’t make up my mind what would be the worst traits of the signs, and that indecision flows over your chart, too. However, I think you’ll find some of that lack of decisiveness a good quality.

Scorpio: I don’t know why house cleaning has come up as a topic for Scorpio, but it bears further consideration. Maybe it’s the approach of the holidays. Maybe it’s the short days and long nights, which mean more time at home. Right before the holidays, it’s cold and dark. At one point, too, this is a cozy arrangement. But there’s still a lingering Mars (and Mercury) influence. With that comes a restless energy. The benevolence of Jupiter is gone, but there’s still a sense that something’s afoot. Like, “the game’s afoot,” and as such, there’s that energy. So I came back to the housecleaning detail. But I’m pretty loathe to make a blanket statement about housecleaning, in general, and specifically for Scorpio. However, stop and consider the notion, I’m not saying this is a week-long project, but a little time spent tidying up right before the holiday cruch crashes into Scorpio? Put a little bit of that restless Mars energy to work, right in your backyard, so to speak. Maybe not all week, but budget a little time to attend to matters that only you can attend to.

Sagittarius: I was making my bed, thinking that I ought hire this job out to someone. But first off, I don’t make enough money to really do that, and secondly, as small as this place is, I’m not sure I want anyone else in here moving stuff — my stuff — around and rearranging the place in a more aesthetically pleasing way. Plus there’s the question of the weather, and when to change to sheets. As always, the winter nights are fickle and I’ll go some of November with a summer-like weather, and then there will a part of the month with a true icy blast from the north. I’ve had this happen before, switch from AC to heater in the same day, not more than 12 hours apart. It happens. Usually about this time of the year, too. Just in time for the November birthdays. Now that we’ve got Jupiter making nice with us, there are a few problems to look out for. I had a small amount of Jupiter windfall, and the first thing I thought about was hiring a maid service, but stop, think about the long term effect of this, after I’d spent the tawdry windfall cash, I’d still owe the maid service, every two weeks. It’s all about thinking about the longer-term effects, not just the short term.

Aquarius: What are you doing, wasting time, reading stupid horoscopes? Forget this. The message, this is as clear as I can make it: just go for it. Simple. No fancy metaphor, no obfuscation and clever word play. It’s really simple. There have been obstacles. Time to stop, assess what the problem is, and then, instead of hiding behind a mess of words? Just go for it. Whatever “it” turns out to be? That’s what it’s supposed to be. But action, not sitting on thy hands, is what’s called for. Short and concise: action is called for. Answer that call with Aquarius Action (should be trademarked, huh?)

Pisces: As much interaction as I’ve had with the real world, and as much time as I’ve spent observing — and participating in — humanity, I still wonder, sometimes, if I’m being played. It would be easy enough for me to write it off as some kind of a life-long karmic payback, too, to find myself being toyed with the same way I toy with fish. Dangle an appetizing morsel that wiggles just right, and then the fish reacts, gets hooked, and we struggle briefly, then, eventually, I let the fish free. Still, I wonder if I’m being toyed with in such a fashion. I was dining at a familiar eatery, half dive, half really good food, and half not sure waitress approached, “Tomare?” Spanish. “To drink?” she was asking. Iced tea, like, it’s a question? After the meal was served, probably, but not limited to grilled bits, hand-made tortillas, rice and beans, and so forth, she asked again, “Aldo mas?” Which, I’m figuring, means, “would you care for anything else?” But what I imagine going on in the kitchen, or at the waitress station? “Can you believe that weird guy is back?” In English. Sometimes, I figure the Spanish is more of an act, rather than real communications, Which why I wonder if I’m being played. Like a fish. That’s where the interaction with the real world, that part is important. I’m not saying, for sure, that you’re at the butt of the joke. However, I am advising a little caution about what people say. Never hurts to dig a little, to ascertain the real facts.

All Rights Reserved
copyright (c) 2005, 2006 Kramer Wetzel, for

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in a trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at

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