Fishing Guide to the Stars
by Kramer Wetzel
(c) 2005, 2006 by Kramer Wetzel for astrofish.net
For the Week starting: 11.30.2006
“The apprehension of the good
Gives but the greater feeling of the worse.”
Shakespeare’s Richard II [I.iii.299]
Aries: I was stumbling around in the pre-dawn dark. It’s always darkest, right before the sun comes up. Out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw a big bug on the wall. I wasn’t fully awake yet, a cat was intertwined in my feet as I tried to pour her some fresh food, and I had to stop to look at the bug. Big sucker. Black, with little legs. It took a moment, but eventually, I was able to focus. It was fishing lure, really, a fly-fishing fly, and it was attached to heavier cork for throwing. In the darkness, I was fooled by my own tackle. Only for a moment, and I wasn’t motivated to gobble it down. But I was moved by the lure, the fly. Bug. Whatever. Even a little scared, except that I wasn’t fully awake. That’s my excuse, anyway. I was wondering when a big, black, hairy critter flew into the trailer and why I didn’t hear it, what with it’s wings and legs and stuff, surely I would’ve heard a big bug like that? My morning’s surprise and subsequent discovery holds meaning on several levels, and the first, of course, is that the lure does look enough like a bug to fool hungry fish. Second, it’s only bit of balsa wood, paint, fluff and not much else, so there’s nothing to be afraid of, no toxins, no stingers. Sharp hook, but not much else. But that first, quick glance? Sometimes it bodes well to take a second look before jumping to a conclusion and hitting the creature with a flay-swatter.
Taurus: I’m doing my miracle worker bit again, at least, that will be the perception in Taurus land. Maybe miracle worker is a bout of an overstatement, but I was be heralded as the savior, or at lest as an apostle, maybe a prophet, for my good deeds. I didn’t do anything, but the planets are finally going to give gentle Taurus folks a break. There’s at least one Taurus who will fire back a snide a comment about that, too, not happy about my breaks that I seem to dole out. It’s not really me who is doing the breaking, or the giving of breaks, it’s more along the lines of Mars, mostly. Plus an odd interpretation of Mercury. Both of those guys are in Scorpio, but before this scope rolls over to the next one? Mars exits Scorpio and moves on to torture Sagittarius. Which, for Taurus, means that there will be a welcome relief. Also means that this Mercury position will liven up some of the interchanges between the signs, most notably, Taurus and anybody else. It’s all about understanding your position, all about understanding what’s going on, and all about how you decide to tell us about what’s happening. Consider that everything you say, do, or write for the next week? Think about putting that on a holiday greeting card. Short, sweet, short, and to the point? Happy holidays, and maybe about two lines that seem to personalize the note. But keep it short. Short in duration is the key, like a suggested, just like a greeting card. Short, sweet, maybe Taurus sassy, but still sweet.
Gemini: I wrestled with this one for a while. I employed every trick in my book to avoid writing horoscopes, except for fishing, since I had to get the Gemini scope done. If I’d left the computer hanging at Gemini, and if I’d gone off and fished? This might never get done. See, there’s a number of planets in Sagittarius. See, there’s a lot of pressure, not all of it bad, on Gemini. From those Sagittarius planets. See? Okay, so you don’t see it, maybe you feel it, instead. And like me, you’re trying to avoid having to deliver the news. If you stop and think about the news, you’ll realize that some of it might not be the best news, and therefore, you don’t want to deliver it. Or it might not be the right time to drop that news on someone’s head. Or, the news’ source might not be accurate, perish the thought that modern journalism would be woefully inaccurate, right? I took the time to analyze your situations and what I came up with was avoiding, seeking that secondary — maybe even tertiary — source to validate the incoming data. It’s about using that good Gemini energy to understand what’s happening at the moment. What I’d be careful about are snap decisions from too little input. What I would encourage are decisions that arrived at by careful reasoning and extended research, preferably not in that order.
Cancer: This scope begins on the last day of November, 2006. All right, this is a weird way to look at it, but while everyone else is toying with holidays and gifts and retail therapy? Let me make a suggestion for Cancer: year-end tax bookkeeping and assorted chores for the new year. I realize it’s more than a month away right now. However, there’s a hint that if you tackle this task now, get it organized, maybe not all of it, but some of the groundwork? You can thank me later for helping Cancer get a good start on the new year. Everyone else is going on and on about relationships, holidays and so forth. Why change the focus? I’m not for really changing the focus so much as I’m trying to use inherent planetary energy that’s fast approaching, and getting you in a better position to deal with what’s around the corner. Don’t misunderstand me, the holiday season is none to bad for you, but still, a little “long range Cancer planning,” with an eye towards the new year? It’s a good idea.
Leo: I think I got this one figured out. What you do is hire an underling to take care of all the grunt work associated with your job, right? Give them a percentage of the paycheck, and your life just got better. Then, what you need is someone who can think for you, at work, like the brains of the outfit. Again, you hire this out, for what’s left of paycheck, and you’re home free. You’ll note that it does take two people fill in where you once worked as a single Leo. For any other sign, this would be impossible, but for you, it’s a simple enough feat. Okay, maybe simple isn’t the right word, but you get the idea, that it takes two people to replace you. But as soon as you run your idea, my idea that I’ve planted in your brain, past your boss? Know what’ll happen? You’ll be looking for a new job with no paycheck. The good news is you’ll have all that free time that you should have. Bit of a Leo conundrum, huh? Easiest course of action, although it might not seem that way? Maybe just continue to do the work of two people. I like the idea of an assistant, hired out to take care of you, but I just don’t see that happening soon.
Virgo: I was reading a parks and wildlife magazine. Or journal. Or maybe just the newspaper, don’t ask, I don’t know. The article was about how the wildlife investigators were bagging and tagging deer with little cameras, sort of like a reality TV for deer show. I’m not sure what the outcome was, the process had just started. I’m not sure I really want to know that much about the inner life a of deer. But imagine what that would be like if a wildlife investigator tagged your Virgo self, you’re doped up with some good stuff, then you wake up, and there’s this camera attached to your head. We see what you see. I know more than one Virgo who would like that, too. That way we’d understand all the trouble she faces, the toil and tribulation, the heartbreak and tragedy. However, I doubt that Fish & Game is hunting Virgo this week. I also doubt you’ll get your own reality show, which is too bad, because the Life of Virgo would be worthy of one these days. A little too much plot, a little too much action, and certainly some tense dramatic moments. The secret to handling this? Pretend that you’re on TV, that one of those cameras is attached to a collar, or an antler, or something. Act as if there is a camera crew filming your every action. What that does? Smooth’s over the rough parts.
Libra:
Scorpio: “Le trompe l’oeil” is fancy French term that means to trick the eye. It’s an art form, practiced by many fine artists, and also practiced by not a few Scorpio folks, too. I’d go a step further and suggest that some of the lures I’ve seen are similar in appearance, as well, but never mind that now. There isn’t a lure named that, at least, not yet. But there should be a Scorpio or two with that name. I’m not suggesting out and out trickery is called for, but a little sleight of hand, perhaps just some handy Scorpio artwork, perhaps just an image or two, correctly placed, will divert the attention from where it is to where you would like it to be. As far as I could discover, the artwork of people like M.C. Escher could fall into this category, and like living in an Escher-esque drawing, there’s something that’s way out of alignment. Or in alignment, but only a careful and ever-vigilant Scorpio can discern that it’s a trick of the eye. Or the artist’s pen. Now, the real trick is to use this to your Scorpio advantage. I’m sure you will.
Sagittarius: Couple of weeks ago, before it got cold, I watched a guy fishing from a kayak, in Barton Creek. The guy was in the kayak, and the kayak was in the creek. More or less floating on the creek, not really in the creek. His rod tip bent, and I stood by, idle, while I watched him land a nice little bass. Nothing to brag about, but then again, not too bad. He held it up, showed a guy on the shore, then dropped the fish back in, maybe it’ll grow up some then I can catch the same fish? Hope springs eternal. Hope is springing eternal throughout the Sagittarius chart, too, except for one or two minor sticking points. One of those points would be Mars and the other is Mercury, both of whom are in Scorpio. Still. It’s about turning our attention to those who can use our assistance. It’s about one, tiny, selfless action that might help someone else. Not sure how this relates to the other guy fishing? I’d like to think, since I didn’t have a pole in my hand, I was being of assistance to that guy in the kayak. Same deal for the rest of Sagittarius types.
Capricorn: I was fishing, the other afternoon. At first, I noticed a duck, one of the mongrel ducks, or goose, really, swimming and flapping, squawking a little, too, more or less, bitterly complaining. Then, at a distant ten meters, behind the fowl, I noticed the source of duck’s bewildering dismay, there was a, looked like, a pure-bred bird dog, swimming after the goose. Duck. Fowl. I watched as the pair eased up river for a spell, about 100 meters, maybe more. Then I watched as the duck gradually changed directions because that dog wasn’t about to give up the chase. Eventually, the goose passed the point where dog owner was angrily calling for his dog, and the dog came ashore. Must’ve been a tired dog, too. Barely shook the water off and probably collapsed. I went back to fishing, as is my wont. But I started thinking about what would happen next. That dog was doing a dog thing. Proud, too, I’m sure that he almost caught the goose, and proud of the valiant half mile or better swim. The duck could care less, at several parts of the chase, the goose just paddled at a normal rate. The dog’s owner? You know he was mad at that dog. Here’s a dog, or a Capricorn, doing what comes natural, and seems like everyone gets all bent out of shape. Tweaked, yelling at you, that vein in the neck pulsing, throbbing. All you were doing was following a genetically encoded command. I’d pat you myself, but you have to shake off the water someplace else. Smells like we dog, you know.
Aquarius: I had some business to attend to, minor and irritating elements that come to running a small-fry business like mine. The problem is that the business tends to interfere with my orderly flow of thoughts, and the day-in (and day-out) material as I was trying to stay abreast of the ever-changing rules and regulations that govern portions of the business. Plus, I know it’s early, but I was thinking about tax-preparation. That’s certainly a good consideration. Holidays, all except one, are over. The end of the year, Yule (and whatever else is associated with the Northern Hemisphere’s winter solstice) is upcoming. But think about the stray odds and ends that need to be tidied up. There’s a little bit of fiscal responsibility, like free-floating anxiety, drifting along in the Aquarius chart. I was at the river’s edge, the other morning, and the fish were, indeed, feeding. Mostly. Fallen leaves were scattered across the surface, and that provided some good cover for the fish, or so I’m guessing. I pulled one little feller out, as he fell for the “old plastic worm” trick, again. It was a moment’s reprieve from the minor business elements I was trying to work with. That fish provided a brief escape, for me. From the way he was flopping around on the dock? I think he was kind of pissed he fell for the same old trick.
Pisces: Ever get to that point wherein you can’t be bothered? The problem is how this looks to other people, namely, me. But I’m not a Pisces, so maybe I don’t get it. But I could easily play a Pisces on TV. Never mind that part now. What I saw, as I was waiting on a long-draw shot of espresso, with a thick, creamy head on it, just like a well-poured Guinness, actually, was the interaction between a rather trendy couple. A stunningly gorgeous brunette, with nice, olive skin. She was talking on a phone, phone wasn’t much bigger than her long, thin fingers, and her outfit was just right to show off all of her remarkable features. Her boyfriend, just a guess, but from the body language, it was apparent he was a significant person, but not so significant that he had her attention while she was making arrangements on the phone. He ordered an espresso, just like mine. She ordered, between snippets on the phone, much to the consternation of me, the boyfriend, and more importantly, the barista taking the order, a “double half-caf, mocha frappe on ice with whip, doyouhavewhitechocolate” thing. As the drinks arrived, he tasted his, and then offered it up to her, “You have to try this, it’s the best coffee in the world.” At that one place? The espresso is probably the best in Austin. World? Doubtful. Point? Which one are you going to be? The bored girl? The animated boyfriend? I hope you get to watch just such an interaction between people, one hopelessly hopeful, and the other bored beyond tears. I mean, it’s good coffee, but it’s not that good.
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copyright (c) 2005, 2006 Kramer Wetzel, for astrofish.net
