Fishing Guide to the Stars
By Kramer Wetzel
(c) 2008-2009 Kramer Wetzel for astrofish.net
For the week starting: 2/26/2009
"Sir, if you spend word for word with me,
I shall make your wit bankrupt."
Thurio in Shakespeare’s Two Gentlemen of Verona (II.iv.38-9)
Pisces: I like watching tourists. And while I can’t say, for sure, that the guy was a tourist, I’m betting he was from "out of town," and I’m pretty sure he was in strange territory. He was with, what seemed like, a girlfriend. Pretty. Slim. Blonde. Very blonde. Might’ve been a young wife, as the pair was acting like a young couple. I can’t say I recall whether there were telltale wedding rings, but he did have, at one time, his hand on the small of her back.
Again, no big deal, I took it to be gentle show of tender affections. Sun-kissed blonde, got an image? Slim, to the point of being too narrow for some guys. It’s that fetching, waif-look found on super-models and similar ilk. A voluptuous brunette rolled by. Jeans a little too tight, a little too revealing? Maybe, the flash of dark eyes under dark lashes, accentuated by heavy — and dark — eyeliner. Almost caused that guy to have whiplash, his head snapped so suddenly.
There was, I observed, the briefest flutter of the brunette’s lashes, and then she had a coy, downward glance. He was, obviously, quite taken with the larger woman with the dark hair. Guys are, regrettably, very predictable. We tend to want whatever it is that we don’t have. As a Pisces, think about that statement, and think about whether you’re happy with what you got.
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Aries: It’s a "look," a fashion that I never really got too comfortable with, not until recently. Usually, not always, but usually, it’s a young lady, and the jeans are designer, or, at the very least, the expensive. Nice outfit, casual but dressy. Or just casual. Aggressively casual, in that tasteful and expensive way. It’s a look that is best reserved for the young.
The crowning element, though, is a pair of flip-flops. Jeans that cost more than I would be willing to spend, even on a whole suit, then just wear flip-flops, cost all of about a dollar. High-fashion and low-brow. One of those looks I should be comfortable with, and yet, there’s a bemused element of mirth, a sly snicker that the look evokes. I understand the comfort level, as I prefer nothing but bare feet or, at the most, sandals myself, so I like the idea.
It’s just the expensive, designer stuff on top of cheap plastic sandals, that’s what I wonder about. Spend that much time, effort, and (apparently) cash? All to flop around in cheap beach sandals? I don’t know. Think about the comfort level, and sometimes, the best — most comfortable — doesn’t have to cost that much. I think those sandals are all of about two dollars at the beach. Might not go with the rest of the outfit, but who cares? Me? I don’t count in this question.
Taurus: It’s the end of February. Resources seem to be stretched a little too thin. The poor Taurus, seems like there’s just one last element left, and it seems that the last piece is being used up. Ahead of time. Seems like there’s something in short supply. Cash, liquid resources, rain, no rain, something. Dry land. What it looks like to me is a personal drought.
This will vary from person to person, but this isn’t like, a long-term affliction. It’s just that the short-term material kind of looks a little bleak. Not really, but sort of seems that way. Hinting around that it appears that there’s not a big traumatic event, but bunch of little ones? That’s what this looks like. It’s not so much "bad" as just "not wonderful."
This is also a temporary situation, as there will be a lift, eventually, and other planet influences will lay in, but at the moment, yeah, sucks. Less of a black cloud over your head as a black cloud over yonder, and it seems to be moving this way. I watched just such a storm front, and while it looked bleak, the thunder and lightening never happened in my neighborhood. The heavy layer of black clouds, scudding along, but no, not right here, overhead. Which is what it’s like.
Gemini: I went out to a different lake the other afternoon. Not a place that I know much about. Not that it would stop me from fishing there, as there were at least two guys out on one of the docks, and a couple of boat trailers in the parking lot. Means fishing was occurring. Don’t know much about the catching, but the active act of putting a line in the water was going on, fishing to some. Not necessarily catching, per se, but certainly fishing. And fish I did.
I tried top-water, bottom-hugging, in-betweeners, movers, shakers, non-moving, floaters, sinkers, and live bait. Nothing even caught any attention, near as I could tell. There’s an old adage, "A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work." While I’m inclined to agree, I was a little disappointed. Not so much as a nibble. I didn’t even hook a stump, or old tire, nothing.
What does my lack of success have to do with Gemini? It was new body of water to me. A new place to fish. I had to observe local customs, figure out what the regulars used in order to be productive. I was just weeding out what didn’t work. That’s really what this is all about. Trying to figure out what doesn’t work so in about 7 to 10 days, you’re primed with what does work.
Cancer: I’ve mentioned this trick before, and I thought, after looking at your personal stars, that I’d mention my little trick. Again. My (Apple) e-mail program added a signature file to every outbound e-mail. One of the various quotes I used for years, from Shakespeare’s Midsummer Night’s Dream, "Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind. (And therefore winged Cupid is painted blind)." One of the girls, or, sometimes, a boy playing a girl, to be historically correct, and never mind. It’s a female character.
The point is that I used that quote in e-mail correspondence for years. Got mistaken a few times. The program added one of my random quotes at the end of each outbound mail, not like I chose that individually. However, in a certain context, it could be construed as a romantic overtone as a closing comment. What’s even more important? Understand how true the quote is. Your Cancer mind is doing some serous roving, and next week kicks off into a good time. But until that time arrives? Don’t confuse a random Shakespeare quote with the real world.
"Sir, if you spend word for word with me,/I shall make your wit bankrupt." (Opening quote)
Leo: "They hate me." Plaintive wail of a particular Leo. And I’d like to suggest, no, "they" don’t hate you, it’s just not a good time. Mars, in concert with a host of planets in Aquarius is opposite you. Oppositional energy has to be dealt with. You can make this a lot worse by pouting, and insisting that everyone, especially "them" are all out to get you.
I can’t think of any reason why anyone would really want to hate the Leo. But this isn’t about "them" against "us," here in the Leo camp. It’s about how you feel. And you do feel, or will before too long, that "they" all hate you. Hardly the case, for real. However, that’s not going to stop the pressure from being applied, and at least once, in the next few days, you’re going to want to call me and tell me I was wrong. Or right, they all hate me. Save yourself a phone call. No one hates you that much. The problem is that their little pea-sized brains can’t understand that you’re right. Maybe they will wake up to that fact, one day. Won’t happen this week, hence the Leo and Leo-sized problem. Some days, hey, if it makes you feel better, think what you want. But keep it to yourself.
Weekly (Monday) update is here.
Virgo: One of the hardest life lessons we have to learn is what bridges to cross and which ones to burn. I’d like to think that me, in my capacity of working with stellar (astrological) influences, that I can help discern just which bridges need to be burned and which ones need to be crossed. As a Virgo, though, you’re tempted to question my judgment about such matters. I’m not offended.
However, I will offer a bit of advice, the bridge you’re about to burn? Might want to think about that a second time. Look carefully. Look closely. What — a hasty assumption made upon cursory evidence — a first glance might appear as fodder for the fire? Might want to think twice about that. Might be less fuel, and more like bridges for crossing.
I’m not saying that some questions, valid Virgo questions, have to boil down to burn or cross, but there is the suggestion that maybe, just maybe, this isn’t a time be waving around a torch. Or even a disposable lighter. Matches. No, none of that. We can make this life lesson easy, or we can make it difficult. It’s your call, but I’m suggesting, at the very least, not yet with the matches.
Libra: It’s all about making a decision. Or, better yet, it’s about making a decision to make a decision, soon. There’s a chance, like, early next week, when it’s a good time to buy. Between now and then? Shop. It’s not about whether or not you can find the perfect item, for some, it would be an article of clothing, and for me, it was a certain fishing reel. Anyway, the point is to shop. Watch, wait, perhaps you can go into the big store and fondle what it is that you want, or, in my case, I looked it up online. I was patiently waiting on a certain brand’s sale.
Sooner or later, what I was looking for, I just knew it would go on sale. That’s what this is all about looking, searching, seeking, and waiting. What I learned, while I was waiting on that particular item to go on sale? I learned about the brand, the company’s history, how much retailers usually charge, and so on. Trivia is sometimes useful. In the meantime, I — slightly obsessively — kept checking circulars, mailers, and websites. Waiting on the deal. You have a chance, the price, the steep discount, shop wise, shop smart, and wait. Next week. Should make you happy.
Scorpio: I was watching a National Geographic/Discovery/History channel special on "Dia de los Muertos," as it is celebrated in parts of Mexico. I watched, maybe 15 minutes of the special before I clicked off. I watched, amused and horrified, as the customs of each little town were trotted out for the camera crew.
A (white person) with a microphone was asking questions in English and Spanish, and the replies, they seemed to me, to be slyly satirical. I wondered, as one village displayed its apparent custom, I had to wonder, if there was signal, like the whole village was in on the scam. "Look, (pale people) with cameras and lights. Make up a rich ethic tradition, fast."
Here, in my village, astrofish.net, it’s a rich ethnic tradition to send $100 bills to the author, every March 1. Like "Day of the Dead," only we call it "Fish Day." The mailing address is on the website*, in case you’re wondering where to send the money. Like those "natives" on TV, like me, you can start your own tradition. I’d look at the first part of next week as the time to launch this idea. I’m not about to belittle the native customs, that’s not what this about. It’s about someone coming along and trying to make a theatrical experience to appease the tourists. But don’t forget, send money:
*astrofish.net
PO Box 830657
San Antonio, TX 78283
Sagittarius: I’ve spent a lot of time coastal fishing. I’ve seen dolphins, off and on, quite a bit. But it wasn’t until I was watching a movie star recite data about sea-mammals that I learned: female dolphins vocalize three times as much as male dolphins. As nature is a reflection of human life, I had to wonder, do female humans vocalize three times as much as males? I’m not sure.
When I’m working, I tend to talk a lot more than the client. But I’m being paid to talk, and I hardly consider myself a fair representation of the population. I don’t make a good demographic sample. I don’t make much of anything ordinary, not that it matters, I’m used to it. I can’t seem to fit the "norm," no matter where I am. Not that it matters.
As a Sagittarius, we’ve got a couple of influences (Sun in Pisces, Mars/Mercury in Aquarius, Venus in Aries) pushing the Sagittarius "talk" button. Stop. Think about those numbers, three times as much, think about how, as humans, we consider that nagging. Are we going to be a Sagittarius blowhard and nag this week?
Capricorn: I suppose there’s some sense of irony. On the back of a friend’s little, I guess it’s a station wagon kind of car, there’s a sticker. "Trust god/clean house." Which is made even more funny by the car itself. It’s a wreck. One fender is crumpled, one door is caved in, and the interior has never been cleaned. Ever, or so it would seem.
"No, see, there’s a filing system, here. I can tell when something got tossed in the back seat from the location to whatever i was eating that week." Or month, to judge from the looks of things, but then, that’s my mind wrapping an idea around a friend’s car, and I shouldn’t be judgmental.
Different systems work for different people. Which doesn’t address the irony of the bumper sticker. That’s kind of the point, too, what needs to be done, and for that matter, what doesn’t need to be done. I like the advice, I’d amend it a little to make it more amenable to my own sensibilities, and add a plural definition of gods, but that’s just my way of seeing this. The part about clean house? Kind of important. Not in a big way but in a little way. And in the case of the car with its filing system I don’t understand? Maybe just run the outside of the car through a car wash? The message, whatever it is, doesn’t have to be taken too literally. Or maybe it does.
Aquarius: "I can’t remember, am I the good one or the evil one?" Client looked at me, halfway through a reading. An Aquarius, actually. Of course. Perfect question, as it can be an ambiguous area, especially now. There’s an urgency foisted upon the poor, hapless Aquarius as a result of having Mars fry along.
Not to mention other, sundry influences, too, but basically, there’s that Mars energy. It works at cross-purposes to to the basic Aquarius plan. Hence the problems, and here’s my solution: borrow from my client. Borrow — shamelessly — from another Aquarius.
As innocent as you can sound, practice saying, "Wait, I can’t remember, am I the bad one or the good guy?" With the kind of celestial pressure cooker going in your sign? I’d like to think that you embody the qualities of the evil genius while still keeping a grander outcome that is much for the better in mind. Good or bad? How about a little of both?
