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fgsSkyHPIM2145
(Fishing Guide to the Stars, what did you expect?)

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Food Notes:

Culinary Adventures

Wal-Mart hot dogs. Has to be a little scary, correct? I’m sure the hot dogs, the cheap brand, the 99 cent version with a no-name label, those are okay, correct? Hope so. No problems, so far.

So the hot dogs, and cheap, yellow mustard, those two items go together like, like, like (insert your favorite metaphor here). Cliché, even, doesn’t matter.

The problem starts, and stops, with the whole-wheat, seven-grain, all-organic bun. Hot dog bun. Whole grain. Sprouted wheat. Probably has little chunks of dirt in it, too. Still, less problematic than the mystery components of the hot dog. Like chorizo, the less I know the happier I am. Good thing I need reading glasses after a long day, I’m pretty sure I don’t want to know what’s in the cheap hot dog.

To insure a really good flavor, a hot dog – or chorizo – is made with parts swept up off the cutting room floor. Good stuff, let no animal product go to waste, and the greasier, the better.

Layer another element on top of this, do it in the microwave. Nuke that hot dog, ends split open, for about 45 seconds. Heat that bun for 15 or 20, and there it is: a repast fit for a king. Prince. Pauper, in my case, but who cares?

I just wonder if there’s disconnect in the time-space continuum, consensual reality, a break, a loss of continuity when the Wal-Mart hot dog is served on that 7-grain, whole wheat bun.

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in a trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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  • Sarah Nov 20, 2009 @ 10:35

    the bun/dog juxtaposition boggles the brain…can you say oxymoron?

  • elaine ireland Nov 20, 2009 @ 14:07

    You just had to draw attention to the contents of these all American goodies, didn’t you. After years of trying to not remember what is in a hot dog, you brought it all back to the front of the brain…gosh, I will miss them… Love u anyway! See you this weekend..THE Leo…

  • Calico Crazy Nov 20, 2009 @ 14:24

    I love the sky and the pretty blue water, the thoughts about what’s in the hot dog not so much. I figure those buns are just a waste the cheap ones are a much better match to the bargain dog and the dime store mustard.

  • Stine - Canada Nov 21, 2009 @ 12:33

    Lovely sky but I’ll pass on the hotdog, thank you. :)

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