“O most insatiate and luxurious woman!”
Shakespeare’s Titus Andronicus [5.i.88]
Cancer: Chunking Bait into the Inter-Coastal. It was a moonless night with a reasonably stiff offshore breeze. Being located in just one place, on a friend’s dock, we were kind of limited in what would work. The water gets churned up and bait needs to smell awfully bad to be of interest to the fish. The idea is that the stinkier the bait, the bigger the fish. There’s something about sitting at the edge of the canal, the juggernaut of a watery road, watching huge barges push past with billions of pounds of payload, and there, at the edge, as the waves gently lap against the pier’s support. It’s quiet and restful and yet, it’s also that intersection of world, the high-tech, low-tech worlds collide. Whether it’s the barges with their carrier loads, or the fishing gear, baited with dead fish parts. High-tech and low-tech, all next to each other. Get that relief where you can find it, no?
Leo: “Best place in town? You come to the Y, then before the car wash, Mary Lou’s, best place in town.” The Y refers to a fork in the road, the single intersection in that town. Not like there’s even a crossroads, just one road with a fork a little to left, goes to another small town. I like rural Texas, and I love me some Leo girls, and combine the two? That was the best set of directions.The following morning, I came to the Y in the road. I didn’t arrive, I didn’t drive to it, I came to it. Fork to the left, see the car wash, and there was a ramshackle place called Mary Lou’s. Hand lettered sign and all. Good food. Uncertain? Ask. Ask for directions and ask local.
Virgo: “No, I mean, yes, they knew each other for three days before they got married. Three days!” The story gets better. It was a drunken hook-up in a singles bar, almost 35 years ago. Still married, to this day. Devoted, even. But only 3 days? Doubt that will happen in this day and age with all the online distractions, and folks being as contentious as they are, especially now. Especially Virgo. I can’t smooth things out but one of the tenets of that relationship was the expression, “I’m in this for the long haul.” Good mantra for the (Virgo) times.
Libra: “Yeah, Bubba? He got that and hornswaggled it around to work,” answer to a question about a piece of home-made engineering that boggles the mind. Been a long time since I heard the expression “hornswaggled.” I’m always afraid I’ll employ an expression or use a colloquial reference point that doesn’t translate well outside of my neighborhood — just exactly like the term “hornswaggled.” However, I think there’s sufficient underlying material to make the image clear even if the wording and expression is localized. It takes some creative, outside-the-normal-lines of thinking to arrive at a conclusion. Can it be done? Yes. Is it easy? Depends. For my buddy, incidentally, his name is Bubba, his strange concoction worked. He took a square peg and whittled it down to fit, more or less, in that round hole. Hornswaggle. Do what it takes to get there from here. It can be done. Sort of easy, too, if you ask him. Took a might bit of work, but yeah, it works now.
Scorpio: So I was sitting in a bay boat, in the middle of Matagorda Bay, and it started to rain. We’d been wade fishing and chasing spot tails up in the cuts. Early morning wades, I can get up to chest high in the water, and it’s sometimes well worth it, rewarding. Summer showers were blowing through and the perception is that the rain cools the bay’s water. No idea, I’m not sure. However, we were sitting the boat, taking a break, and when the squall line moved over, We grabbed raincoats. As I zipped up the rain coat, buddy looks at me, “We were just chest-deep in water, right? So why are we putting these on?” He smiled. As both a Scorpio and a water sign, think about the obvious. Why are you doing that? Why are you — okay, like me — pulling on rain gear when you’ve been chest-deep in water all morning long?
Sagittarius: One of the more remote spots on the Texas Gulf coast, the Devil’s Elbow, as it was named, one of the spots is, relatively speaking, remote. The town itself, while named as a location on the map, for the last century, it’s been unincorporated. There is no mail delivery in that part of the county. There’s a satellite post office, and anything addressed there gets “general delivery,” which means, if I understand this correctly, means the person addressed has to go to the post office and pick up the mail. No rural delivery. No house-to-house mailman. Kind of a cool, rural touch, and speaks well to why I like that one spot. Remote without being really remote, less that two hours from town, and yet, still armed with classic old-world, small-town charm. And eccentricities. Part of what makes this so interesting, well, interesting to me. Fishing is good, too. It’s the little eccentricities that delineate the changes. There are changes underfoot. Under the Sagittarius feet. Careful, don’t stumble over
Capricorn: The Bluebonnet Cafe in Marble Falls, one of the last great diners — Marble Falls is an hour west of Austin — one of the noted features is pie. Pies. Coconut Cream Pie, Pecan Pie, in the early summer, fresh peaches from nearby orchards? The deal is, was, is, the deal is there’s only so many pies made on any given day, and now, right before July 4th? Not so many of the Chocolate Coconut Meringue pies. “All we got left is fruit pies.” Got there too late in the afternoon, although, breakfast is served all day. Life is like the Bluebonnet Cafe, Capricorn Life, and the pies at the Bluebonnet Cafe. If you’re not there in time? You miss out. Missed out of the Chocolate Coconut Creme Pie, but stumbled into Cherry Pie that just rocked my world. Facing a shortage of some kind? There are two options, get there earlier, that’s always a good plan, or realize that only so many of certain item are manufactured on any given day, and that the shortage — or relative paucity — it is not your problem. It is your problem, but like my happy stumble into a fresh cherry pie? Not a bad mistake.
Aquarius: Couple of years ago, we experienced a bone-dry drought. Two summers in a row exceeded the previous records, and in one case, the record number of days over a 100? Sure beat that record with plenty of room. Almost tripled it with the triple digit heat. The next year, the rains started. On two separate occasions, one time was a half-foot of rain and another time was almost a full 12-inches of rain. In one day. I live in a land of contrasts, a land of extremes. Drought one year, floods the next. Can’t get enough one minute and the next minute, there’s too much. As an Aquarius, the Water Bearer, as a matter of function, you know what this is like, too little or too much. I’d like to provide you with middle ground. I’d like for it to be just enough, but not too much. I can’t do that, and right now, you’re looking at too little or too much. Doesn’t matter which one it is, drought or flood, there will be a change, in the blink of an Aquarius eye, and no matter what was too little, there will be too much. Or too much? Next comes scarcity.
Pisces: Movie, no, there’s this one movie and I’ve only seen it twice. I saw it once from the bed of a pick-up truck — me and cousins all piled high with blankets under the early spring sky at the drive-in. Then, in repertoire, as a summer movie at the old downtown theater in Austin. Excellent movie palace. Good venue for a show, and for some reason, that movie, like I suggested, I’ve only seen it twice, but there are parts of that film which ingrained in our day-to-day fabric of life. Partly because it was of genre that died off and has resurfaced, made popular by a new generation of movie-makers, and in part, because, although it was inexpensive to produce, there was thought, care and craft involved in the production. Classics that have, over time, stood up well. When I was researching this horoscope’s material, I found more than one academic treatise on the subject, and the title of that film. So my fascination isn’t far from wrong. A movie I’ve sat through twice. I’m sure it’s on TV, too, but that detracts from the movie-going experience. Classics. In one form or another, as Pisces, you have to pause long enough to consider some action, some undertaking, what it is that you’re doing, what part of this will be a classic? Careful what you commit to, as well, as the casual remarks can life forever on the inter-webs.
Hippie Liberal Democrat Dope-Smoking Freak
Aries: Buddy, not named ‘bubba,’ to be sure you know which one, buddy invited me over to hang out. “Apartment’s pool, man, you got to see the women!” Not sure of that’s the exact phrase but it’s close enough. Newer complex, south side of town, interesting mix. Skinny blonde girls in tiny bikinis, sure, but I was more intrigued by another character. Hispanic guy, two afternoons in a row, middle of the week, too hot for me to fish, and this guy was drinking a brand of beer that has Tomato and Clam juice included in the can. I’ve heard of ‘red beer,’ the hangover cure, but I never liked it. So I’m rather sure I really wouldn’t like Clam Juice and Tomato Juice mixed with beer. However, that one guy, he was enjoying himself. He smiled broadly, referred to me as “brother,” his white teeth against brown, sun-baked skin. I like Clam Juice. I like some Tomato Juice. Not much for the beer thing these days, but that’s me. I know what I like and what I don’t like. No need for to me to experiment with a brand of beer that has all three items in it, no, no reason. As an Aries, do you want to experiment and make costly mistakes? Or stick to what you know best? I suggest you stick to what you know works.
Taurus: “The bigger the hair, the closer to heaven,” old, not exactly tired expression that applies in portions of Texas. Not long ago, I stumbled on a corollary, “The higher the heels, the closer to heaven,” and the accompanying image? Six-inch stiletto heels. Perhaps the rest is best left to the imagination. Big hair and high heels, must be a summer month for Taurus (or winter, for that one Taurus in Australia), but around here, there’s a fashion statement, as simple as a T-shirt, bumper-sticker slogan, that can help ease the (Taurus) problems. “I fail to understand how a bumper-sticker about my fashion is going to help with my problem this week!” Okay, figure it like this, it’s an expression on a T-shirt you’re wearing. Someone sees it make a lurid comment that, for some reason, a comment that would usually evoke a sneer? You grin, instead. Mood lightened. Suddenly, the day is a little better as that one passer-by understood, grinned and you grinned back. Reminds me of another bumper-sticker that would be equally useful, and would certainly produce a smile on my face, “Go ahead and honk; I’m reloading.”
Gemini: Back to the bottom of the list? Hardly. Just looks that way. Anyway, this isn’t about where you rank, not as the Gemini that I try to look out for. I was at the dentist office for a routine scraping, cleaning, and lecture. You’ve heard the lecture, “Are you flossing every day? Blah-blah-blah.” There was a new tech and she was going to work inside my mouth. She took one look at my snapshot of a medical history, and she pulled on an apron, latex gloves, a face mask, then a faceplate over her mask. Rather scared. Something in my history spooked her. She was well-insulated from me. Distant. I like that one dentist office, the TV tends to play Xtian music, and the office staff is a collection of — apparently — Hispanic women that could be, to me, interchangeable. Smiling faces, but I’m in and out so quickly, that I don’t notice much. One had highlights in her hair, I think. Very pleasant surroundings. Recommended highly. That last time, though, the mask, the faceplate, the extra layer of protection, am I really that spooky? I’m not sure. The regular tech doesn’t use any of that and we compare family notes. Doc always takes time to shake my hand, but that’s about all I see of him, which, if you ask me, works just fine. It was that extra layer of protection, the paper mask under the faceplate. As a Gemini, are you overdoing it? Is there a good reason to overdo it? As far as her touch? Gentle as could be. Good tech. Once I got over the layers of protection.
