Horoscopes by the Fishing Guide to the Stars starting 5.30.2013

“Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.”

Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Prince of Denmark [I.iii.68]

“Shakespeare’s plays are printed on the best crown paper, far better than most Bibles.” (Early observations.)

Gemini: I studied, or, at least, I was briefly acquainted with a system of colors that determined mental and physical health. Like the medieval system that had “humors,” or “humours,” really, symptoms that corresponded with alleged physical health requirements, the color chart, resplendent with riotous hues represent various ailments and possible treatments.

The color I kept looking at, variations on a theme, there’s a lot “yellow” in Gemini. I’m not sure what that means, as I have several definitions, from the “The Golden Rays of the Universe,” to “chicken.” Much area in between those two. This is a situation where you can pick what it means, and if you’re a good Gemini, you’ll discover that the meaning changes.

Cancer: I remember getting a reading from a purported expert. She would lay out the cards, certainly not traditional Tarot cards, and then she would pause as she had to look up the meanings in a booklet. A good reader, but the part about looking up definitions in a book bothered me.

It’s that jarring, slightly out-of-place action, the step where you pause to access data, like, on a phone, in book, something wherein an expert is taking a step that looks clearly amateur.

As the moon gets smaller and smaller? Avoid steps that make you look like you don’t know what you’re doing.

The (mighty) Leo: Buddy of mine was sitting poolside, messing with his phone, like, checking messages. He looked up. I motioned to the “boom-box” sitting on the pool’s table, asked him where it came from. He named a neighbor, “It’s his. He got my truck.” As terms of deal, that’s not really well thought-out, as those portable stereo things are less than a $100 and his truck, late model, kitted out? Cost a lot more.

Not sure the truck is even paid for, but the price? As a swap? Not sure it was a good idea. Part of this is about a missed communication, and part of this is about what other people hear. Make sure your Leo message is getting received properly. Do that by checking in and asking, not telling.

Virgo: Before we go any further, name three things that you, as a good Virgo, quick, right now, three things you’re grateful for. Stop. Now, three things, short gratitude list. Three items you’re happy for. About. Like, whatever.

Out of that list of three things you’re grateful for? Pick two. Of those two, pick one you’d like to work on. Improve, increase, get better at, prolong the joy. Something. There’s a world of Gemini energy just bearing down on your Virgo self. The obstacle is picking one, and the bigger obstacle is staying happy in the face of these obstacles. However, as a trick, pick three things you’re happiest with, then pick the easiest one to work on. There’s always, in this less-than-Virgo-perfect world, a need for a Plan B. Which you’ve got. If the first item isn’t working right now? You’ve got two others. Why I suggested we start with a list of three.

Libra: My father — Libra — had a huge collection of Shakespeare Festival (of Dallas) shirts. As a past president, and occasional board member, he collected the shirts over many seasons. A few years after he passed, the shirts were collected, collated, and then turned into a pair of quilts. My sister has one, and I’ve got one, a quilted memorial that — here in South Texas — not much use. However, it is both utilitarian and a unique way to preserve elements of the passed. The idea of taking something old and faded, then recycling it as a new object, perhaps combining the best parts of the old stuff and using that again? There’s the idea, the succinct way to deal with a week’s worth of disparate — mostly Gemini — parts. Cut it all up, then patch it together as a new piece that still serves a valid function.

Scorpio: This experience starts with books. I find first-time novels, first published narrative by just about any author, the first publication is a little ragged. There’s usually a raw feeling, doesn’t flow as well as later works, but the energy is more than present, almost like the words themselves bubble off the page. There are greater errors, too, in those first novels, with flow and characterization lacking. Still, the exuberance shines through.

I was thinking about the first novels, and I was looking at that with a “long tail” search, I went back and found the first album by a certain band. The first album was probably their best. Raw. Unfinished edges. Rough in both the center and lacking focus. Still, as albums went, even in its uneven state, it displays that raw, youthful energy so frequently not present in later works. Instead of inventing something new, with Saturn all up in your Scorpio business, let’s look at that first piece, musical, written, whatever it was that you did. Stop trying to reinvent; let’s use something you’ve already got.

Sagittarius: Ever get an idea, then you just HAVE TO IMPLEMENT THAT IDEA RIGHT NOW! That’s the excitement that accompanies this week’s missive. The important facts? None of this has to be done right now. There is one Sagittarius who will argue, vociferously, with me about the timing of the event. “Now!!! Now! Now ! Now!” Okay, sure, it’s your dime, honey. But “now,” and I don’t care how many exclamation marks are employed, but “now” isn’t really that important. Seems to be at the moment, but it isn’t. There is urgency, but not so much that you can’t afford to delay, just for a few minutes, maybe a day or two? Just put it off for a moment.

Capricorn: Because I am more pedestrian than anything else, I’ve learned to pay attention. I lived in Austin (TX), which was, oddly enough, a pedestrian-friendly town. Every place else I’ve lived? Not so much. I’ve learned a second time, now a third or fourth time, to watch for the drivers’ attentions. Watch where the driver’s eyes are glued. Like, turning at an intersection, the driver never looks up? Don’t be surprised if that driver tries to run you over. Happens to me. More than I’d like, and even though I have the right-of-way, that doesn’t deter local drivers. At all. So watch their eyes, where their attention is focused and when it isn’t focused on what’s in front of you? Be careful. Expect the unexpected, like a failure to yield the right-of-way to your Capricorn self. You can be correct, but run over. Flattened Capricorn, like, a cartoon image? In reality, the upset is much less enjoyable, as you don’t tend to spring back. It’s matter of watching the other person’s eyes, focus, direction. You can easily see this coming, as long as you pay attention.

Aquarius: Buddy of mine got a degree in counseling. He now works with the State, as an adjunct to Child Welfare or something. I don’t recall what his latest business card said, had a state logo on it. He’s funny, when he was in school, he pretty much dissed everything I do. He doesn’t anymore. In his case files, I got him used to the idea of looking for trends with birthdays, and he noticed that it does happen. While not a true believer, no Aquarius ever embraces a belief system entirely without some fact checking, he’s started noticing substantial corollaries. Birthdays, particularly, this resonates with an element in his chart, but Gemini birthdays are heavily impacted, now. I can’t tell him how to do his job, but the Gemini factor?

Pisces: I believe in magic. Somewhere between my Astrology, the Law of Attraction, Positive Thinking, and sprinkled with some Dale Carnegie, there’s a sense that some of this works. Might have a little bit Feng Shui layered in as well, and some Tibetan Meditation techniques. The proper expression is “sympathetic magic,” and it implies wishing for something that’s going to happen. I use astrological timing to help matters along. Good times, better times, good moon sign to launch an endeavor, best time to fish, that sort of event-timing. This is the time to focus the Pisces dream-like state and pull it together. Focus. Concentrate. Saturn lends conviction to Pisces desires and dreams, and Saturn lends an ability to manifest in reality, those dreams and desires. Make it happen. If you can dream it? You can make it real. The first step? Pick out exactly what it is you’re striving for.

Aries: I worked with one “press agent” whose claim to fame was, “Press releases so good, they get printed verbatim.” While it was true, that one press release artist was good enough to get her material printed, oftentimes, straight from the release itself, it was due, in part, to her client — a large, nationally known charity. Not-for-profit, dot org kind of a thing.

If you craft it carefully, correctly, follow the prescribed set of rules for writing a good press release, then yours can be featured, too. Whatever the message you’re trying to get across?

Starts with a headline, an attention-grabbing headline. Good headline, then a short introduction on what it is is, then three bullet points about why we’re interested, then a strong wrap and in conclusion, why we need to click here. Some type of “call to action!” Strong close.

Headline, problem, bullet points, and then call to action. It’s a format. I just gave you an outline to fix the Aries issue. Fill in the blanks.

Taurus: The problem with the inter-nets and wild web thing? Hard to come up with something I haven’t seen. Hard to find something new. I think I have one: ice house rock. “Ice House” is rather limited term as it’s pretty much local to South Texas, near as I can tell. I’m sure they had ice houses in a lot of places, but here, it became a local gathering place for daily news, neighborhood gossip and eventually, cold beer. I know a number of local watering holes that have the term “ice house” woven into the title. One of the best independent record stores in the world? Waterloo, in Austin, traces part of its heritage to Waterloo Ice House. So what is “Ice House Rock?” I have no idea, other than, locally, it’s a moniker attached to a band that doesn’t get much airplay outside of local joints.

Mars eases out of your sign. Time to take a leisurely look around for something you can’t find on the inter-webs.

No more Mars.

Make it leisurely.

Like, look for some Ice House Rock.