But that my heart’s on future mischief set,
I would speak blasphemy ere bid you fly.
But fly you must. Uncurable discomfit
Reigns in the hearts of all our present parts.
Away, for your relief! And we will live
To see their day, and them our fortune give.
Away, my lord, away!

Young Clifford in Shakespeare’s Henry VI, part 2 (V.ii.85-91)

Horoscopes by the Fishing Guide to the Stars starting 12.3.2015

Sagittarius:

“Away my lord, away!” True words and the Sagittarius needs this kind of spurring. Onward, upward, away, fly! Flee! There’s an image of Mr. Mercury, the archetype for the Roman God, the messenger of the Gods, the wily one, the original trickster himself. He has these nice sandals, not unlike what I tend to wear, and his sandals also have wings. “Fleet of foot?” Heard that expression? Now you know where it comes from, and the original icons for Mr. Mercury showed him with wings on his heels, as he lifted off and took the air as a messenger. Mercury spends the last ten degrees of Sagittarius, spinning us through stuff. The trick to use this energy? The proper use? “Away my lord, away!”

Take flight, turn heel, get up and go? Whatever you call it? Run away to confront another day.

“Right, Kramer said it, I am so out of there!”

Capricorn:

There’s an Xmas mania that sets in, and I can’t do anything about it. As long as I’ve been in this business, and it’s been a long time, I’ve noticed that the holidays bring out the best — and the worst — in humanity. I can’t do anything but report what I’ve observed. There’s crush of media hype that started last July, and that just spurs Capricorn ever onward. My birthday happens every year at the T-Day time, landing on Thanksgiving once every seven years or so. That shows I am more than empathic with the Capricorn problem, “Here, I got you this for your birthday and Xmas….”

Our problems come from the mass hysteria that is instilled in everyone else, and like I suggested, this started last summer, when the various sales departments started to ramp up for Xmas Retail Season. Bummer. As a Capricorn, this has happened every year. As a Capricorn, you’ve been through this, and the nice person that you are? Don’t buy into the hype. A simple gift card will do just fine. Or nothing at all. Don’t give into the hype and you’ll feel ever so much better. With the planets where they are? There is, it’s like planetary peer pressure, only, like I’ve said, don’t bend to convention.

Aquarius:

Xmas parties are cool. They can be way big fun. Attitude is important, though. I had two parties, back-to-back, and I had to pick. Sure, I could go to both or I could just wander the downtown streets of San Antonio, and look at the lights. It’s a festive little city, San Antonio, with its Riverwalk, and the holiday lights have been up for a week or two, now. Fun stuff. The problem, as an Aquarius this really isn’t much of a problem, but the joy lies in the idea that there is too much going on, and not enough of you to go around.

Follow my idea, I was supposed to be two places at once and I wound up, by various hostess’s standards, I wouldn’t up no place. By my (think: Aquarian) standards, though, I was out on the Riverwalk for a portion of the evening. Balmy winter night, light jacket was all I had on, all I needed. I felt the joy of the season with no pressure to be seen “having a good time.”

Aquarius: Xmas and its party-like atmosphere is cool, but we don;’t have to partake, if we don’t want to. Nothing to be sad about, I just haven’t mastered two places at the same time, and I’ll bet you haven’t mastered it yet, but if anyone was to do that, my bet would be an Aquarius.

Pisces:

I was housecleaning. Really, I’m unsure of the term’s significance, because I was attending to a number of older files on the computers — files that were no longer needed. As I’ve aged, I’ve tried to phase out certain web addresses. Too many is confusing. I’m down to just a few email addresses, just a handful of websites, trying to keep it all simple and easy. I had an option to delete an old backup file from a computer I no longer own. I have long since transferred the useful data, the pertinent material, over to a new computer. No, the lingering backup was just taking up storage space, and it’s not like it was any big deal, but it was digital ephemera that could be deleted and hosed off. Use that space for more current projects. Housecleaning. Call it what you want, it was taking stock of available space, figuring out what no longer belongs and what I could get rid of, and then, tossing the older material that is a duplicate or triplicate of something, anyway. My favorite Pisces friend? Housecleaning. Perfect for right now. Besides, with the holiday madness upon us, in full force? Housecleaning might turn up some odds and ends for recycling.

Aries:

Read the instructions. It’s that simple. There’s a set of instructions, right there on the side of the package, included with the box of parts, search for a set online, something.

Just read the instructions.

The typical Aries route is to look at the exploded diagram, then dive right in without a hint. One set that came with piece software, the instructions I really like, with a title, “Instructions for people who HATE to read instructions.” That caught my attention. Seems there’s one step, in that case it was computer hardware, power off the computer, plug it in, then turn on the computer, then turn on the peripheral. Simple, no? Right, just remember to read the instructions. Just glancing at the detailed list of what comes first? That doesn’t work. There’s some detailed efforts required, from our Aries buddies. In that single example, it was the way the machines all had to be powered back up, the first time. Anymore, most gear is hot-swappable, so that isn’t an issue. Which means, in this example, reading the stupid instructions even more important.

Aries: read the instructions, first.

Taurus:

I’m not sure how this will translate into your Taurus life, but the example I came up with? Set a budget for holiday expenses. I’ve got a deal with my Sister, we give each other $100 gift card at Xmas. Works out great, and if I was really cheap, I could just recycle the gift card each year, just get a new envelope and card holder. I’m not quite that cheap, but in a lean year, and this is a lean year around here, that thought has occurred. I haven’t done, it yet. The way it works, though, we have a set dollar value, and I know, like last January, that at Xmas, I send her a gift card. That simple. Stays within budget. This way? There are no unpleasant “sticker shock” surprise. Works well for everyone.

So with holiday madness unfolding, and with the crazy-factor getting ratcheted up just an extra notch? Stay on budget.

Make a plan, then work that selfsame plan.

Gemini:

An old girlfriend, well, she’s not older than me, so she’s not really old, but she’s been a girlfriend for a long time, so, yes, an old girlfriend was watching me get dressed. It’s winter time. I was pulling on my boots. I stopped and upended each cowboy boot before pulling it on. “Why do you do that?” she asked. Force of habit. Back, in the long years before, scorpions, spiders and snakes would crawl into the warm confines of a recently worn cowboy boot as a place to spend a cold winter’s night.

While I tend to stay far away from places that have scorpions, spiders, and snakes as potential overnight guests, the habit persists. Why do I do it like that? Habit. Habit from lore, and as a kind of protection. Never can tell when something will try to crawl into my boots, and emptying them out is merely a prudent, protective, proactive behavior. Might insure longevity, too. The scorpions around here are not deadly, just uncomfortable. The little city snakes are never the poisonous types. Spiders? I’m not sure, but just to be safe? I still shake my boots out. As a Gemini, there’s a simple, similar action that is required. Something. Maybe shake your boot out, or throw salt over your shoulder. Whatever it is? Do it.

Cancer:

Been a busy holiday season for you? Here’s the problem: it’s only going to get more busy. There’s just not quite enough of you to go around. “Is Mercury Retrograde again?” No, that’s not it. This is more about the Sagittarius Sun, along with Saturn, then the motion of Mercury, as it relates to your Moon-Child self. I can’t fix that. What I can suggest is that you pull up your big-girl panties (breeches, pants, dress suit, whatever) and face the popularity problem. You’re required socially, and career-wise, in too many places and you can’t seem to keep the schedule straight. Tough problem to have, not enough time. If this were me? I’d adopt some kind of Xmas T-shirt outfit, and then I could bounce from place to place, and even at work, people would be able to understand that you’ve been playing, and now you’re working, but you’re trying to squeeze it all in. I know you can do it.

The (mighty) Leo:

There’s a tiny amount of frustration that creeps into the Leo life, the magnanimous and virtuous Leo, The Leo. There’s a stupid pedestrian, using a walker to cross the street when the light has already changed. There’s a slow-moving mini-van with some kind of weird reindeer decoration, stuck in front of you. If it’s me? I tend to slow down for yellow lights, not wishing to tempt the Fates. If you’re typically Leo, you’re behind me, cursing, “Why didn’t that old man just go? It was yellow!”

I didn’t go because I’ve had one too many experiences with folks blowing through lights, almost taking me out. Of course, in this town, your town, too, yellow is an invitation to smash down on the accelerator. Not always the best choice. These are examples of minor irritations. None of these are major. The reminder? Slow down. Look for the mistletoe. Slow down. Smell the spiked punch, or the hot cider.

Virgo:

“You said good things were going to happen!”

And they did.

“You said I was gong to win the lottery!”

Metaphorically. (Although, it’s been known to happen.)

“You promised me riches!”

If you do your homework.

“You said it was going to be easy!”

Oh dear, when is “easy” ever an applicable term for Virgo? If it’s easy, then you’re not interested. There are no easy shortcuts in life. And life of Virgo is far from easy right now. I suggested that there was room for advancement, room for something to happen, if you followed up with all the options. Failure to follow all the proscribed steps? Therein is the problem, and for once, you want this to work out? For once, try following all of the advice, not just some of it.

“You said I was going to win the lottery this week!”

Did you buy a ticket?

“Uh, no….”

See the problem here?

Libra:

I love me some Libra, but you guys need to chill out a little. We have rather wacky, unpredictable weather in South and Central Texas. Bitter, arctic cold one day, freezing temps, and then, two days later, I’m in shorts again. So think about chilling out with one of those arctic blasts of cold air. Around here, that means it’s time for “roadkill” boots, usually faux leather booties with faux fur like Uggs, only, all polyester, or some other less natural kind of material. Leather or leather-like skin. Scarfs, woolens, heavy winter wear, all of that comes out and two days later, it’s no longer required. But wait! It will get cold again.

One buddy called it “Psychotic ex-girlfriend weather,” but I wouldn’t go that far. Although, if you knew his last girlfriend, hot and cold in the same sentence. Good buddy to fish with, but really kind of rotten tastes in the girlfriend department unless, like I suggested, hot-cold in the same breath. Like our weather.

Here’s the deal: pick one. Either hot or cold. Stick with one. It’s a little weird when the afternoon temps are pushing upwards 70 or more, to still see the roadkill booties, but that’s me. If I were out in the pre-dawn times, the cold-weather gear might feel better. But I’m not, not now. No early morning trips for me. Too cold.

As a Libra, pick one, hot, cold, doesn’t matter, pick one and stick with it. Given that Mars is still scalding his way through your sign? I’d suggest hot. But that’s just my take.

Scorpio:

Buddy of mine bought a boat. After much conversation about it, I offered up the idea of putting his soon to be ex-wife’s name on the boat. “Kramer, no, I don’t think, ‘sorry bitch’ is a good name for the boat.” Typically, most of the fishing boats I see, the smaller bay boat and bass boats, typically, they don’t have names on them, just the registration number. Sort of like a permanent license plate. I’m sorry my Scorpio buddy was going through such a hard time, but there was genuine Scorpio malice in my heart when I made that suggestion, about naming his water craft after his most recent ex-wife: that would bother her way more than it bother him or me. We’d never see it, but she would hear about it all the time from some mutual friends. It’s win-win for everyone, what I thought.

As the holiday seasons starts to unfold? Think about it. It’s gesture of some kind, perhaps symbolic, perhaps real, that would help, I mean, it looks like he was being nice, right?

“He spends more on fishing, and more time, than he EVER spent with me!”

I still thought it was a seasonally appropriate way to deal with the Scorpio energies.