Horoscopes for 6.27.2019

I’ll show thee the best springs; I’ll pluck thee berries;
I’ll fish for thee, and get thee wood enough.
A plague upon the tyrant that I serve!
I’ll bear him no more sticks, but follow thee,
Thou wondrous man.

    Caliban in Shakespeare’s The Tempest 2.2.77-81

All for a spot of wine. A dram of wine.

Horoscopes for 6.27.2019

Cancer

The Crab - the Moonchild
Yeah, the above passage from Shakespeare’s The Tempest is fun, usually easy to do, too, as the “monster” (Caliban) has never tasted wine before a couple of old drunken sailors introduce it. Fun stuff. Caliban will do anything for some more, as the alcohol relieves the pain and burdens of living — and serving — in the wilderness with the main wizard, Prospero. Reminds me of an updated version, an expression attributed to Golden Age science fiction, “One man’s magic is another man’s technology.” I should offer points for that correct quote and attribution, but I know I’ve got in Pink Cake someplace. I think. Instead of spending too much time fact-checking, or trying to locate a source for a quote, let’s look at a little bigger image here, in the sign of the Moon Child, as there’s a message within Caliban’s statements, wherein he prostrates himself in front of some otherworldly creature, begging for more. Couple of old drunk sailors, who, by the wizard’s magic, arrive intact and freshened up, despite the appearance of calamity at sea. Too much? Watch for the “I’ll do anything for,” well, in Caliban’s example, it was merely cheap wine. Happy Birthday!

The Leo

The Leo
Next few days, I was searching for an apt way to describe what benefits The Leo best, and all I could think about was “potluck.” One of those social deals where everyone brings some kind of dish? Party, gathering, social event, fundraiser, any number of excuses for a group of like-minded individuals to get together to break bread, share a community meal, and the way it works? Everyone brings a dish or platter of food. Or food-like substances. When I’m invited, I just stop by the grocery store and get a pre-packaged bag or tray of something, maybe a sheet cake. However, for The Leo and this week?

It’s like having it catered, almost, but not quite. And then, it’s like everyone pitches in to serve The Leo, but it’s not an event packaged like that. Your Leo self benefits, but it’s not pulled together in a fashion that looks like we (non-royal “we,” non-Leo we) are serving the royal Leo, sometimes known as, The Leo, our lords and masters. No, a doing a potluck let’s everyone shine. Lets everyone participate, equally, and still serves the purposes of serving The Leo with fewer non-Leo feelings hurt. All in the this week’s pitch, and I suggest, you pitch “potluck.”

Virgo

Virgo
Backtesting a new theory, or rather, looking at an old equation, and then running it backwards to see what fits? Worked well for me.

Same influence now applies to Virgo: backtesting.

Look, this should work well into the future, but to see if it works in the future? We’ve got to find out what happened, when in the past, so we can properly navigate the future. Have to understand where we’ve been to get to where we’re supposed to be. Or, understand where we’ve been so we can aim for a better place in the immediate future. Either variation involves understand the immediate and even then, the more distant past for Virgo, but in grasping that past, there’s a way to see the further, or see a way through this mess, and arrive where we’re all better served. That’s the Virgo goal, right? Get to a better place, a better portion, a new and improved (thing)?

To move forward?

Backtesting.

Libra

Libra
Allow for the serendipitous nature of this kind of intellectual inquiry to work. In the midst of the big, US holiday, the ramp up to parties, weekends, summer vacation, and and crowded resorts? As this activity roils and boils, at a breakneck speed, give it time to find a cool very-Libra-like respite in a bookstore. OK, this is where details vary greatly. For me, the easiest image is a bookstore. But that’s me. Can be any number of retail or retail-like places. The book aisle at the warehouse store, where certain best-selling authors have books delivered by the pallet? Sure, that works as well. All depends. However, consider my locations, mostly South Texas, and this is summer, so bookstore is the easiest image. As the holidays madness, the mid-summer madness draws attention elsewhere?

Time to let the intellectual curiosity work. Roving, looking in places we might not normally look, like a tome about business, or the latest literature theory — that’s seen publication — then, oh look, a thriller by a favorite author, and it looks like it’s a book I haven’t read yet, plus, it’s remaindered, good price. Serendipitous nature — Libra — like, shopping in a bookstore.

Scorpio

Scorpio
Ok, here’s the deal, for Scorpio — one word. “Short fuse.” I know, it looks like two words, but think of it as one word, a special Scorpio shorthand message to yourself. One word: short fuse. Seeing as how this ends with the July 4 holiday? The trick is, be aware, there’s an extremely short fuse on that Scorpio ordinance you’re toying with. For at least one buddy, this very clear, he will be playing with live firecrackers, and one will probably go off in his hand. Boom! Can’t say this was exactly a Scorpio surprise, but there will always be that shocked look from a certain Scorpio who fails to heed the (simple) warning.

    One word: short fuse.

This can pertain to the aforementioned firecrackers that are so common in my landscape, or this can refer to some other kind of potentially explosive situation — I’m thinking about a conflict of personalities. You know, those people who fail to understand the Scorpio Way, and how that way tends to be best? Yeah, what you get then? One word: short fuse. Some folks suggest I take to long to get around to the point in a horoscope, but this is special, for Scorpio, one word: short fuse.

Sagittarius

Sagittarius
As I’ve aged, I have to ask myself, “Is that the best use of available time?” Little mystical, little metaphysical, and a little bit off pondering unponderables. Still, as a silly Sagittarius myself, I have to give this some thought, and perhaps, on larger scale, suggest it to more than one of my Sagittarius friends.

The question is simple, as it considers “time” as a fungible resource, and how that time is spent, what the time is spent upon? Consider it like a transaction, except, that, as a Sagittarius, yeah, no, not thinking about time and life choices in terms of money. That debases my time, and the Sagittarius mind, to worry and ponder the little details about how I spend my time; how we — as Sagittarius — how we might spend our time in relation to what, and the greater good, and what is our destiny? There’s a focal point that has to do with how we want to spend our avaIlable time. How we want to spend, to expend our energies, and what serves us best? Personally, there’s a certain amount of “Not doing anything” in particular, that matters, and yet, it fulfills our need to be busy and productive. I liken this to reading trash or pulp fiction. Fun stuff, sometimes devoid of meaning. Or is it? I can tease great messages out of the simplest and most unlikely places, but I’ve trained myself to do so. While it might look like wasting time to some? Is it really?

Capricorn

Capricorn
For several years, lately, I’ve worked in a number of “Wholistic Rock Shops,” and while the term itself, “rock shop” can evoke the cry of “Rock’n’Roll!” Yeah, not that kind of rock. Nor is a reference to finely cut gemstones, but more like exotic mineral specimens, frequently of crystalline nature that display certain characteristics and properties. One type is personal favorite, less for its intrinsic metaphysical properties, and more for the way it reacts to light, Labradorite. Towards that end, I had some in my shower stall, just raw chunks, and when the water hits it, the various facets sparkle. I picked some up the other day for my fishing buddy’s kids, as they were fascinated with rocks in my bathroom. When they learned that the water made the rocks sparkle, all the better. I took one chunk of that mineral, I had a large piece, hit it with a regular hammer, made several smaller pieces, and gave each of his kids a piece. Now they have rock that sparkle in their bathroom, too. Little trick. Cost me nothing. Helped, for a while, with getting his three kids into bathing in the evening. Cool trick.

I have powers I never knew I had. Part of this is merely a cheap trick. Part of this is legend, myth, new age crap. But part is science, the chemical structure of that particular mineral and the way it reflects the light when either polished or wet. My buddy, not exactly a single dad, but he does spend a certain amount of time with his kids, and bathing has gone from chore to fascinations with mineral specimens. Whatever works, Capricorn, whatever works.

Aquarius

Aquarius
Many years back, I switched up my wardrobe to the simplest, easiest possible choices. Not really choices, either, just grab and go. Not much to think about. Shorts, they are all cargo — or cargo-esque — and then a simple selection of either T-shirts, Hawaiian-print shirts, or fishing shirts. Or some combination thereof. One characteristic that all of these clothing choices seem to share? All loose and baggy. Room to move. Room to sweat. Room to “grow,” although I doubt I’ll get any taller by now. I tend to stay away from tight clothes. For one, they don’t flatter my physique, and more important, to me, they are less comfortable. This is an example of form and fashion that follows common sense.

As this week moves forward — especially for Aquarius, as I rotated the stars in their positions around and considered influences, I kept thinking about restrictions, then I was thinking about restriction that would hold Aquarius back, and finally, I arrived at what seemed like good advice, because, let’s face it, this is advice I follow myself.

“Do as I do,” and I’ll make an effort, especially right now, to lead by example. No tight clothes. Nothing too restrictive. Nothing that binds too tightly. In short? Stay out of tight clothing. Or tight spaces. Or spaces that suggest tight clothing.

Pisces

Pisces
Hot and cold, way it goes. by now, there’s been the onslaught of oppressive summer heat, like a sticky, wet cotton blanket, just gets more and yucky as the days wear on. Then, there’s the ever-present AC, so outside, it’s too hot, and inside? It’s too cold. Frigid, dry air, on some occasions, the AC makes my sinus cavities hurt, it’s so dry, so cold.

The history of AC is almost 100 years old in Texas, too.

Makes for an interesting way to see how far we’ve come — or not. Depends. There’s never any one way to dress for these kinds of conditions. Too many layers, and the sun’s an oppressive object burning in the sky making us miserable, more miserable by the moment. Barest of clothing, like a swimsuit, or the loincloth I threatened for many years? Step inside one of those building with Super-Max dry, frigid air? Start to shiver. “Catch your death a-cold.” To make this week work best for Pisces? Find a location, usually near an exit, where the door swings open frequently. Just inside — or just outside — perfect place is a patio near a bookstore and coffee shop, and every time the door swings open as patrons exit, there’s a blast of cold, dry air that soothes the tempered brow. The other option, just inside that same exit, little table by the trash can, every time the door swings open, the frigid, cold air escapes and the warm, moist weather seeps in — pick one side or the other. Both work. I prefer the outdoor seating, but that’s me, and I’m not Pisces.

Aries

Aries
While I have many Fourth of July memories, early childhood, firecrackers, then later in life, just “blowing stuff up?” it’s that Tween time, not a teenager but not a “kid” anymore? The fireworks were safe and fun. Might not have been safe, but it was fun.

Move into the current era, more as an adult, or adult-aged, as I am wont to say, and as an adult-aged person? I recall, pretty specific in the last few years, meeting some fishing buddies and various WaGs, Wives and Girlfriends, outside of town, to spend money on fireworks then blow them up.

As one of my more enterprising buddies would do? He would attach a string of firecrackers to a rocket of some kind, so not only would the rocket go up and do a colorful display of pyrotechnic engineering, but there would be the added bonus of whatever my buddy tacked on, as well.

Some were more successful than others. One time the payload was too great, and the rocket arced back on itself, landed near us, and proceeded to provide magnificent ground-level explosions. Had us all sort of dancing around to avoid fireballs.

Some firework experiments are successful. Some are less successful. Some work well. Some fail miserably. That failure was epic and still talked about, many years later. Success? Failure? A successful failure? I figure that’s what it was, but it was fireworks, my buddies, and clearly no real adult supervision. Since it’s still talked about, was it firecracker failure, or success? Aries? Even failures — you should see this one coming — even failures can be a huge success. Go out with a bang?

Taurus

Taurus
Pressure to change; Pressure to remain the same. Pressure to answer what the pressing problem present. Internal and external forces that result in? Pressure on the Taurus soul. Pressure. Some winds of change suggest Fate and her siblings want one direction while the internal barometer would suggestion a different direction, or, at the very least, a different tack, in order to arrive at the Taurus destination.

As this builds, this mounting impetus to change some aspect of the Life of Taurus, consider the source of the directive. While I can easily blame the stars, not every Taurus is so lucky. Still, there’s a clear amount of push and pull, and to me, looks way more like push than pull, exerting an influence, then gentle coercion, then, a less than gentle coercion, more like a being forced?

What I do, to buy time? I have a stock phrase or two I can employ. “I’ll take that under advisement.” Or? “Certainly worth considering!” In both examples, no commitment was made. Did not sign on the dotted line; didn’t affix a thumbprint indicating approval; didn’t purchase on a long-term lease arrangement. Nothing. Did promise to look into it, whatever the question of change, and agent of change is suggesting, just didn’t promise to make that change, not for Taurus, not yet.

Gemini

Gemini
If it were to your advantage, would you use it? “No, that’s like cheating,” or, “no, that almost unfair for me to use that.” If you give me a lever, I feel almost honor-bound to use it. Hand me a tool that I can use, and I’ll use it, as long as I see that it makes life, or the situation or whatever it is, as long as it makes an improvement.

It’s that improvement, even though it might not be coming from an honorable place? As long as there is improvement? Do we really care? “It’s a grey area,” is the most frequent comment I hear at times like this, as in, the question is whether or not the use of the tool is valid.

In the example I was originally thinking of, it was a cheat sheet, readily available to everyone, and the teacher encouraged the use of said cheat sheet. It’s a tool, and instead of trying to remember a myriad of useless details, here, piece of paper, look it up yourself.

If it’s to your Gemini advantage, would you use it? Make me spell this out for you? Isn’t that like cheating? Yes, but here, quite clear, if it’s to your advantage, and legal, use it. Tools are built to be used.

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About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in a trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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