Horoscopes for 12.26.2019

    Not from the stars do I my judgment pluck
    And yet methinks I have astronomy,
    But not to tell of good or evil luck,
    Of plagues, of dearths, or seasons’ quality;
    Nor can I fortune to brief minutes tell,
    ’Pointing to each his thunder, rain, and wind,
    Or say with princes if it shall go well
    By oft predict that I in heaven find.
    But from thine eyes my knowledge I derive,
    And, constant stars, in them I read such art
    As truth and beauty shall together thrive
    If from thyself to store thou wouldst convert;
    Or else of thee this I prognosticate,
    Thy end is truth’s and beauty’s doom and date.
  • Shakespeare’s Sonnet 14

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Year at a Glance: 2020

Astrologically speaking, what does the next year look like?

Horoscopes for 12.26.2019

Had to happen sooner or later, but that’s a whole Shakespeare sonnet, #14, stretched out as this week’s preamble, which, I will add, includes a clandestine overview of the next year. The use of the term, “astronomy” in line two, that was from an era when astronomy and astrology were pretty much on the same page.

New Moon in Capricorn, Dec. 26, 12:13 AM Central. Objects in the mirror may be closer than they appear.

“Boxing Day” is a quaint British — as far as I know — tradition.

Capricorn

CapricornOlder guy looked at me, shrugged his shoulders, “It’s another ‘grip and grin,’ you know.” Never heard it like that. Totally new phrase, to me. While I was, over the years, used to the expressions, like “Press the flesh,” or “meet and greet,” I never heard “grip and grin.”

It was one of those situations, soldier up, where we’re forced to interact with countless, swarming hordes, some are people eager to meet us, and some are people, well, “Not so eager?” There is that. It’s not all bad, but I tend to stay away from the catered chicken or — personal experience suggests — stay far away from the catered fish dish. I tend to stick with sad vegetables that are over-cooked with runny sauces that seem to have melted between cooking and catering, usually a day — or more.

Older wire-heads used to call this “meatspace,” a place where we all had to physically interact, and some of the kids these days, they do seem clueless, unable to look up from their phones. While I prefer to hibernate during this time? I’m not Capricorn, and there’s a certain calling that must be answered, pressing you into service.

“Grip and grin,” it’s the way your next year looks. Practice the elevator pitch. “You got 20 seconds to sell me.” Get ready, it’s the special Capricorn season to grip and grin.

Aquarius

Aquarius“Nothing runs on automatic,” L.W ‘Bud’ Shipley, Jr.

It’s a quote that I started this year with, at the very beginning of 2019 — Nothing runs on automatic. As we look 2020 solidly in the eye? That quote kept echoing in my mind. First place I saw? Shipley Donuts, and I dismissed the quote as a “founding father” aphorism that seemed a little out of place. Donuts, how hard can that be? The one place that’s close, while it’s not anything I’d eat out of habit, I got one buddy, and that’s his catnip, plain, glazed donuts from Shipley’s. So I kept seeing the sign, and I incorporated it in some of my work, as reminder, more to myself than anyone else, that there’s always the human touch required.

What’s beautiful, to me, about my work, as there is an element that can’t be duplicated by machine. Where the planets are? Exact science, astronomy. What that means? Subject to interpretation. So as we march firmly into a new year, a year of great changes? Remember, my little Aquarius friends, as the great donut magnate dictated? “Nothing runs on automatic.”

Pisces

PiscesGot one fishing buddy, and he usually eats “healthy,” however that might show up these days. Has carrots and celery's sticks, on the boat, for munching and snacks. Yuck. Especially celery — that's a “negative” food group. “Like, you don’t want to talk about it, bad memories, trauma associated with celery?” No, as in there is less calorie-value in celery and it requires more effort to chew and digest than it brings in usable fuel sources.

It’s not eating, it’s exercising.

So this one buddy, one morning, he shows up with a box of off-brand, grocery-store “honey buns.” Essential elements are refined, white flour, sugar, chemicals, and three different kinds of grease, like palm oil, seed oil, and just plain grease. I don’t know, butter-like flavors. Mostly, just sugar. This was a few weeks back, when it was still, in my mind, warm enough to fish without too many layers. In other words, I could wear shorts. But my normally healthy Pisces buddy was indulging in some of the most heinous — really tasty — but still bad junk food. Packaged sugars, bad fats, refined grains, and chemicals. I don’t think there was anything “natural” about the honey buns. Sure were good with a styrofoam cup of convenience store coffee. Think I ate two, and pictures of the fish are on the site someplace. Break from the routine, and do so in a big way. Do something different. For my one healthy-eating buddy? It was a simple: Honey Buns.

Aries

AriesCorporations have birthdays, or a natal chart that I can associate with the company. The way the financial instruments work, with a “fiscal year” that bears no resemblance to a real “year” as I understand it? That’s all part of the number-cruncher’s game. The way I hear it, the most common term is, “Our fiscal year begins in ...” with what seems to be a rather arbitrary date that has nothing to do with the beginning of the year.

Here’s the trick, the calendar year, the next 12 months for Aries? Starts the day after Xmas. Dec. 26. In plain language? The Aries new year — 2020 — starts Dec. 26, 2019. In parts of the UK, it might even be late on the 25th, and rolling forward, Eastern Standard Time, might be like, right at 11 PM on Xmas Day. For those of us West of the Mississippi? Basically? Starts on Dec. 26 — so be prepared. Party is over, hit the ground running, and in typical Aries fashion? Be ready. Best example? That bookkeeping stuff that is usually put off until after the new year? Start now. That clean up and dispersal of goods? Start now. Get a jump on the next year of miracles by starting now.

Taurus

Taurus“Solid and pedantic.” While that’s no kind of a ringing endorsement, it does spell out a certain type of ever-present energy for the mighty Taurus, and especially as we squarely face-off towards this New Year, plus wrapping up the old. “In with the new and out with the old,” wait, not yet, just in with new.

Maybe we’re not so ready to part with the old, not just yet. There’s certain amount of nostalgia that is present, and going to be around for a while. That, plus some big changes, and an echo from 40 years distant. Maybe not quite 40 years, but there is an echo from the past. Hints, directions, new goals, and a fresh start? All dependent on two factors: what went before (for Taurus) and what we would like to have happen, in the new year (for Taurus).

Simple stuff, and the original premise to this week’s energies? “Solid and pedantic.” Which is what we’re going to go with, as a way to get across the finish line of 2019, and get launched into the new year. Not a race, not a competition, not a situation to see who crosses the line, first, as there is no prize for arriving quickest. As this week unfolds and as the new year gets rolling along, the key phrases? For Taurus? “Solid and pedantic.”

Gemini

GeminiMy fine, mercurial Gemini friends, what does the new year hold for us? For you?

Hint: never try to “out-weird” me.

Just giving you a heads up on that little idea. Doubt that you’ll see me in the immediate future, but if you do, just wrapping up holidays and family, plus the assorted crush of whatever, so the message is simple.

“Don’t try to out-weird me.”

Might not be me, per se, but some person near and dear to you? Weirder than you? World view that is way off from even your Gemini lack of central focus kind of way of seeing the world? Yeah, this isn’t contest. It’s not a race. This isn’t a competition. In other words? This week, and for that matter, on, into the future?

“Don’t try to out-weird me.”

There’s a strong, comepetitive edge to most Gemini energies, and that’s nice. Excellent even, and usually, you’re a clear winner. I’m admitting it. I’m good with that. You like to win, and well you should. However, there’s a different kind of contest, more along the lines of friendly rivalry — and this is one — think it through — so you really want to win this contest? Or, a simpler way to look at this, and as our year unfolds, “Don’t try to out-weird me.” Not contest. Not a competition. There is no race.

Cancer

The Crab - the MoonchildOnline, there’s fairly concise treatment of the facts, as much as we know them, about the historical battle of Agincourt. The real Henry V, not Shakespeare’s highly fictionalized version. The account of the battle in the play is little fast and loose with facts. Still, a smaller band of Englishmen defeated a large contingent of Frenchmen, battle changed the face of history. The real data is less impressive than the one presented in the play. “History is written by the winners,” is the quote that I hear.

    There is that.

But either the historical event itself — or Shakespeare’s play —— suggest that a determined number of individuals facing daunting odds, like, feeling overwhelmed and certainly outnumbered? It’s still possible, with proper tactics, to overcome, defeat a superior enemy, and win the day. It’s historical, although, the play’s treatment tend to get more notice. The darkest days of the year are just ahead. Technically, the days are getting longer as we march towards the spring, but it’s still a dark time, and with the new moon? Really dark for Cancer (the Moon Children). Looking around at either the historical or dramatic version of the events at Agincourt? That should help your Cancer, Moon Children selves understand that it is possible to overcome what seems like numerically superior numbers. Yes, you can win and triumph over the opposition.

The Leo

The Leo“Garbage in, garbage out.” GIGO was the term. Still applicable, although, its use has fallen from favor. This — after Xmas week — marks a special kind of clipping, clearing, cleaning frenzy for my majestic Leo friends. While I don’t really know, offhand, any Leo royalty in the UK itself, so I can claim no peerage or royal linage for this, I do tend to treat my Leo friends as such. Therefore, no matter where one might be on the planet, as directed by thy stars, there is a process to employ. Got some new stuff though the holidays, new accumulations of material, hold onto that.

    Got some stuff that no longer serves a functional purpose, need to let that go.

As the expression intoned, “Garbage in, garbage out.” There is some material, old t-shirts that have long since passed their life expectancy, but those same mementos hold so much personal data, I’m unwilling to let go of them. Nothing I need, but a folded t-shirt takes precious little space in a hall closet and from time to time I remember the event, concert, fishing trip, place I used to work — a really long time ago? All of that, swimming back. No, that’s one I hold onto. But there’s newer stuff that no longer serves any kind of a purpose. Yes, shuffle that material off with Boxing Day, which, according to me, can take a whole Leo week. Winning scenarios for The Leo, GIGO.

Virgo

VirgoOld buddy, maybe, sure, let’s call her a former client, she took a swing at me. She didn't succeed, but you have to ask, does a “Swing and miss,” or in this example, a clear, personal shot at someone, does that count? It would matter if the commentary mattered, which it didn’t. Not to me, anyway, but it was clear I was a target. No, I was the target. Intended to be hurtful, maybe poignant, but hurtful, as well, and that doesn’t matter, not to to me.

Inside? I’m dead to such taunts and rants. At on time, it did matter, but these days? Yeah, maybe not so much. I thought about the verbal abuse. I thought about the deep-seated angst that drove those words forward. I thought about what it said about me. I thought about whether it applied to me, or not.

I’ll go with the “or not” version.

Care to expostulate? I’d rather not. I like think of such attacks as true ad hominem verbal assaults, and the attacker reverts to such tactics when otherwise devoid of any other ammunition. It’s an old metaphor, but as we move into the new year? “And, and.... And your mother dresses you funny!” Really? Best you got? I dress myself, thank you. My own mother lives in sustained fear that I dress myself like this. Much to her chagrin. C’est la vie, n’est pas? So, what this means, my dear Virgo friend? Examine the insult, the purported injury. Did it really matter? Or can it bounce off, and is there a cuter offhand comment you can make that helps? If you stiffen, toughen up just a bit? You’ll get through the next few days, then weeks, then months, relatively unscathed. I might even suggest, that the perpetrator suffered because your Virgo self doesn’t.

Libra

LibraThe other evening, over supper, I heard the best line I’ve heard from a Libra, in quite some time. It concisely wrapped up the proper energy that is unleashed this Xmas season, and then the New Year’s Eve stuff, then as the rest of the new year starts to unwind?

Simple expression, too, not overly complicated, and I snickered when I heard it, then grabbed a pad to make that note. Simple expression, and what’s coming up? There’s a time when karma, the universe, whatever it is one believes in? Great Spirit? Whatever the belief system, there’s a time in this next few days, especially, when decisions are in order. Pick directions. To borrow a worn a sports metaphor that I don’t get? “A swing and a miss is better than a strike.” Yeah, so that one didn’t work, besides the pitcher used a slider ball that greased its way past home plate. Still don’t get it?

“Baby, I like you to make the decisions.”

See, that’s the line that I liked, and it applies to gentle Libra at this time, as in, “Baby, I like you to make the decisions.”

Scorpio

Scorpio“Dad, are you wearing socks with your sandals?” My buddy nodded yes, glancing up from his phone, as he was absorbed in an online thing. “Why, why, oh, you’re just so embarrassing!” Without missing a bit, but maybe a sideways glance at me with a smirk, my buddy proceeded to tell his “tween” daughter that he was an old man and he did what he wanted to do. I was waiting for the “I’m your father, and it is my sworn duty to embarrass you as much as possible.”

My buddy, without so much as a glance upwards from the screen, managed to deliver the whole message, albeit in different words, the exact way it’s been handed down from generation to generation. I was grateful to be there to hear it. He’s got a Scorpio daughter, which is why I was thinking of this exact example, and this occurred a few weeks back, last of the fall season’s sporting events for his tweens. There are certain traditions which must be observed, and the example of the dad just totaling ruining his daughter’s outing? Good stuff. Glad I was a patient observer off to the side as no one knows the wrath of Scorpio better than me. Here’s the thing, the holidays are all but over, now, and the seasons are grinding forward towards that inevitable “rebirth” of a new year. For that Scorpio child? For any Scorpio? A week later, she was wearing, anyone’s guess? Socks with sandals. It was cooler out, made sense.

Sagittarius

SagittariusThe art — maybe science — of the thirty second movie trailer? The teaser? Advertising in its highest form? Not sure everyone agrees that this is high art, but the ability to take — let’s just say — 120 minutes of movie and condense enough story to hook the viewer, giving a graphic detail and some high points, snappy bits of dialogue, all of that, without giving away the complete plot of the show?

Bad guys, explosions, romance, true love, hot sex, bombs, and bullets? All in 30 seconds — here’s the catch, especially for Sagittarius and the weeks ahead: Give us enough to work with yet not so much as to give away the details of the story. Maybe that one catch phrase, but not totally in context. Will the (Sagittarius) hero win? Will he — or she — find that true love? If I could cut this next week, the weeks ahead and then, the year as a movie trailer, I would, but I lack the art (skill) to do so. What we have though, is an action-packed, summer-blockbuster of the year ahead, the deal is, we — Sagittarius — have some work to do in this next few weeks to prepare for that summer blockbuster hit. What scenes are included in the 30-second trailer for the next few days? Pick. Pick and choose careful, as we don’t want to reveal too much.

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“Nothing runs on automatic.” - L.W. “Bud” Shipley, Jr.

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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