“No, my profound heart; and yet (by the very fangs of malice I swear) I am not that I play. Are you the lady of the house?”

Viola as Ceasario in Shakespeare’s 12th Night (I.v.82)

Horoscopes 4-14-2026

Mercury into Aries 4/14 10:22 PM
Mercury conjunct Neptune 2° Aries 4/16
New Moon Aries 27°28’ 4/17 6:51 AM
Mars/Saturn/Mercury 7° Aries 4/18
Sun into Taurus 4/19 8:41 PM

Horoscopes 4-14-2026

Aries

Go cheap. The problem in our post-modern world? Choices. We have too many choices. We can have it delivered to the front door, for a price, and we can get it in every size, shape, or even color. It’s not that there is too little, there is too much. What this does, overwhelmed by possible decisions? What this does to Aries? Make a decision. Doesn’t matter, just pick one. It’s probably the wrong one, but try. Instead of thinking, “This is the one,” think more like, “I’ll try this, see what happens.” Like me, you’ll probably pick incorrectly the first time or two, but if you don’t make a few mistakes, how can you know when you’re right?

Taurus

The New Moon is a great time to set intentions. This New Moon hits at a very late degree of Aries, the sign that precedes Gentle Taurus. Means this is a time to look at some goals, set intentions, figure out what you want moving forward. But these goals, intentions, and desires? Due to the position of the new moon?

These should be two-parts fantasy to one-part reality. I like dividing it up into thirds, and going with two-thirds obvious fantasy. Unrealistic, and yet, certainly enjoyable. “Probably not got to happen, but I can dream, right?” That’s the idea. Now, there’s also one part, a third or even little less, maybe just a quarter, that is certainly based in reality. Good. Let’s see what the next few weeks bring. Almost happy birthday time.

Gemini

“I am not confused.” I agree. “I am not messed up.” I know. “I see this clearly!” I’m sure you do, but the problem, dear Gemini, the problems ahead? While not of your own making, or mostly not of your own making? The pea-gravel in the sky is making this into an issue. Making this into a problem. Problems. Probably not of your own Gemini-construction, but still, you have to fix it. Coercion — management — takes many forms. The obvious route, the way you see so Gemini-clearly? not everyone gets that. Since we don’t get it? you’ve got to come up with a way to gently inform of us that there is a way through this mess. Coercion — management styles vary. Repeatedly asking might be an easier way rather than trying to force us.

Cancer

I first heard this, many years distant, from a little town in West Texas, part of the legendary oil patch. I carried it forward, and recently, I was asked again, and while I can’t give particular source, I can suggest that it was a single person, wondering what was too young. In the example, part humorous, part serious? “Really, you shouldn’t date any younger than your own kids.” I’ve adjusted the terms and conditions, but the idea, and it still holds true? for about two percent of Cancer, Moon Children? As a guideline? Don’t date anyone younger than your own kids. Why would this come up at a time like this? You know, aren’t glad you asked. I’m sticking with the guideline.

The Leo

I think, at the peak? I carried six or eight different e-book readers on my tablet. There were a couple of library apps, then a stand-alone book reading app, and I think I still have a few publisher-specific apps for their various “free” offerings. Gradually, I winnowed that down, but I still have favorite book-reading apps, and sources. Please support public libraries. However, comes a time, when nothing will replace a simple book. Bound pages, no battery, no electrical source required. I can make notes in the margins, dog-ear pages, use scraps of paper for bookmarks? It’s tactile, it’s a universal interface, and it works. I try to be extra careful before buying any more books, but every once in a while, I’ll come across a Shakespeare reference, or an author whose works I adore, or some other circumstance. Some mitigating factor will get me to buy a book. Therein is this week’s massive missive to the magnificent Leo: get the book. It’s helpful to have handy reference as this moves forward, and you’ll find yourself wanting to reflect a particular chapter and verse.

Unrelated: Books by Kramer Wetzel

Virgo

One issue with visual display, a particular element that I’ve toyed with since before the this career? The font. The letters themselves that carve out the message. What I wanted, my most recent idea? A typewriter-looking font that was monospaced, like a manual typewriter. Like, it would look like it came off a manual typewriter, in proper manuscript format. There are a problems with that targeted ideal, though. Most of the modern software spaces and scrunches the letters together, with ligatures, accent marks, and other punctuation, in manner of making it look correct. More readable. I’ve mentioned this in passing, having mostly broken my old habit of two spaces after a period, the problem falling to a really old keyboard/typist/typesetting trick. Still, the idea, and the goal of the exercise, to find and implement that kind of a typeface, a plain, manual typewriter (looking) font that is mono-spaced? The message is clear, and it causes a pause when deciphering the meaning. There’s no question as to what letters were in what order. Looking forward? Look for clean and simple. Like an old typewriter font. A note on the type.

Libra

While I doubt that any decent Libra is really an anarchist? There are little edges of the rebel that start to shine through. Maybe not shine through, but like a light leaking under a closed door? Not too bright, but there’s the revolutionary rising up in Libra to always question authority. Me? As an outside observer, I suggest it is good to question the status quo, the authority figure. Me? I always think that it’s a good idea to not blindly accept but ask pointed and specific questions. That’s me — I’m not a Libra. Questions and asking for specific details are a good idea. The problems arise when your Libra self has certain answers you expect. Questions are good, being the good little rebel you are. Expecting certain answers? Not so much.

Scorpio

It’s the weirdness factor. It’s the “No one saw that coming” factor. It’s the “No idea where that came from” routine. Or, like I suggested, it’s the “weirdness factor.” There is no reputable guideline to follow, not for Scorpio, due to this inherent weirdness quotient. One problem I’ve always had, blame my upbringing, mental conditions, diet, or even environmental issues, but whatever carries the burden of the blame? There’s still that answer I have that comes from some place that seems like it is a little too far out. The “Kramer Wetzel non sequiturs” are legend. My problem is a leap of faith, and tenuous connection that not everyone follows. I get it. I see it. Scorpio gets it; Scorpio sees it. It’s that weirdness factor.

Sagittarius

The goal is clarity. The results are probably confusion. But the goal is clarity. Our little Sagittarius selves should aim for clarity. I’ll toy with charts and meanings, take it apart then put it back together again, then look at it with my head tilted, maybe squint my eyes, and then? Still, I am confused. Follow me with this, though, and even my focused state? We’re not going to let that deter our search for clarity. I took apart an old fishing reel, cleaned and lubed the innards, then assembled it again, following the diagram I dug up online. Didn’t work right. I patiently disassembled the reel again, put it all back together, and it still didn’t work correctly. On that third try, I looked at the instructions, and there was a spring that I wasn’t getting cocked correctly. Just needed to be tucked behind a small stud. On that third, really fourth, try I got it reassembled correctly and it works. Better than new, as it is cleaned, greased, oiled, and broken in. Clarity that emerged from confusion. Only took three, four tries.

Capricorn

For two, almost three decades, the bulk of my work was at convention centers, hotel ballroom conference tables, either six or eight-foot models. Folding or stackable chair, tables with usually a rough surface, provide your own tablecloth. Early on, I wanted a sign that was portable, large enough, and didn’t require any adhesive to attach to the wall. What I wound up with was a simple a foot-wide banner with the URL: astrofish.net, and nothing else. It served well, as I could roll it up and stuff it in the bottom of a suitcase or show bag. Eventually, it wound up replaced by the more conventional banners that have their own stands. It’s part of what became my 5-minute set-up. That old banner, though, it’s now stretched across a wall in my garage. I was thinking about it because there are other remnants of this career, as well. Couple of old lake fishing poles that I don’t use very often. A promotional image of me, blown up to poster-size. That banner with the old URL. This is not about what’s been before, where your Capricorn self is right now, and where you think you should be headed. Along those lines, though, looking at the detritus in the garage, the old promotional banners tacked to the walls? What — how long — is it going to last?

Aquarius

The problem with years and years of material, two, three decades of internet scribblings? I can reference a comment I made, and there’s some leftover from a more raucous, less politically correct time. Some folks might find portions of that older material offensive. I think it shows growth. If nothing else, it shows a progression. That’s a kind of an inherent “getting better” situation, isn’t it? All we can hope for is a kind of progress, and expecting this to work out perfectly is — what does Buddha say about expectations? “That crap will mess you up.” I cleaned it up. This is about starting fresh, getting a good, clean kick-off to the new spring season, and how you want to do that? Set forth with fewer expectations.

The less you expect of others?
The happier you will be.

Then, too, looking back? That was fun, but given a historical perspective, it made perfect sense, then. Maybe not now. Expecting historical to hold up? Unrealistic expectation.

Pisces

I have long extolled the virtues of my “pile it” method for organization. I’m not sure exactly what category this falls under, but that doesn’t matter. As a way to loosely organize material, that stratagem — my “pile it” method — works for this week’s loose energies floating freely across gentle Pisces. There is form, structure, timelines, and placement. All of that is a kind of disjointed, archival, forward-thinking way to approach what’s loose upon your lands. Simple, not too contained, and able to move material around, as shift occurs, which it will. Aware of the fluid, dynamic, yet somewhat rote patterns that are in place? Look for something just like my “pile it” method to help serve as avenues forward in these uncertain Pisces times.