Fishing Guide to the Stars for the week starting 4.14.2011

"We cannot call her winds
and waters sighs: they
are greater storms and tempests
than almanacs can report."
Shakespeare's Antony & Cleopatra [I.ii.144-6]

If Mercury is retrograde for you, it's retrograde for the IRS as well. Goes around, comes around. How to time the mailing of the tax form?

Aries: The girl's an Aries, I know that. She's got on heavy eyeliner, with little lines, drawn out past the corner of her eyes and endings in swirl-finish. It's both garish and enticing at the same time. I used to fall for those tricks. Still do on some days. Against her olive complexion, the eye liner looks almost natural, accentuating the big, brown eyes. It's a ruse. It's trick. It's not real. The lines around her eyes, they've been drawn on her face with a pencil, pen, maybe even a Sharpie. Who knows, for sure? A trick of the light, the harsh springtime light pointing to little flaws in the plan? That's what this Mercury Retrograde and its implications is about. What's real and what's clever marketing? What's makeup that comes off with soap and water, and what's lasting? Valid questions for the good-looking Aries.

Taurus: There's a distant musical strain that filters through my world. I tend towards the Latin side of town. South side, West Side, whatever-side. It's really a little less geographical other than a relative closeness to old Mexico, New Mexico, and culturally attuned. There's a backdrop of "mexican" music. It can be Tejano, Norteno, Conjunto, or a personal favorite, Nortechno (Norteno mixed with Techno, a la Mexican Institute of Sound).
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Fishing Guide to the Stars for the week 4.7.2011

"Our loves and comforts should increase
Even as our days do grow!"
Shakespeare's Othello, The Moor of Venice [II.i.195-6]

Mars squares Pluto. Mercury in retrograde. Aries: I got so tired of the misrepresented facts of Mercury Retrograde I wrote a book to dispel the myths. Looking for trouble? It will find you, doesn't matter what the planets say. What I'd like are some solutions to problems. Why I wrote the book. The book can be found at, for starters, or from your favorite retailer. Why am I pushing a copy of my book on you? As an Aries, you'll find the book short and to the point, unlike many of my horoscopes. It will also suggest that you push ahead with whatever you're working on, just be aware of the usual pitfalls that can accompany a backwards Mercury. It's also about, like my book, going over something we've covered before. That simple. Previously covered work. Taurus: I rode a regular Amtrak train for a while, as a commuter special. Worked well for me as I lived close enough to the station in Austin, it was, for me, walking distance. Perfect. That train ride got me used to the idea of train music and there's a long history of music that features trains. Lonesome cowboys riding the rails, old blues numbers, all that railroad music. As one more modern (Austin) musician noted though, "The sounds of trains only remain in the memories of the ones like me..." (Steve Fromholz - Gemini) I kept thinking about a train image for Taurus. The usual metaphor is that there's a train coming, get out of the way.
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Fishing Guide to the Stars for 3.31.2011

"O shame, where is thy blush?"
Shakespeare's Hamlet [III.iv.83]

Hamlet, addressing Gertrude, his mother. Mercury, in apparent retrograde motion. See listings for details. Neptune enters Pisces. But Mercury is still Retrograde. Aries: As a side-project, I started publishing digital images of San Antonio (Bexar County) TX as a daily photo weblog. Started as an amusement for myself. Spun off into a truly strange world. The images themselves, some are years old, from decade-long service in and around Texas, to include San Antonio. The basic assumption is that I'll publish one picture a day. Enter Mars unto Aries, adding a level of fire to an already hot mix, i.e., Retrograde Mercury, Sun, Jupiter and Uranus. Adds a level of impatience. Now isn't really soon enough. The way that side-project works, the images appear at whatever time I get around to posting them, once within the 24-hour period. Doesn't occur at the same time, and there's no rhythm, which can further infuriate an Aries. No schedule, loose rules, nothing but a simple guideline, all sort of annoying. Here's the hint: learn to bend with our ways. Either that, or keep compulsively clicking to see if/when the site's been updated. Usually occurs between six in the AM to ten in the PM. Sometime in there. Taurus: Austin's world famous SXSW (South By South West) Music, movie, and so on? The weather is usually good for part of the week. However, during the middle of the week, or at one end of the week-long spring-break festival, sometime during the event, it will rain. Cold, gentle, spring rain. Didn't one year, but that was a drought year. The year it didn't rain, natives were fine, but out-of-town guests suffered with debilitating heat. Summer arrived early that year. However, rain during the week is a safe bet. With the line-up in the sign in front of you? "Rain" is a safe bet. Doesn't mean it will really rain in your neighborhood, but it does mean that there will be an upset, there will be a delay, there will be heavy weather, something, some event that upsets the finely tuned Taurus expectations.
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Fishing Guide to the Stars for the week 3.24.2011

"You are the weaker vessel, as they say, the emptier vessel."
Shakespeare's Henry IV, Part 2 [II.iv.56]

It's Shakespeare's Hostess suggesting Doll keep her mouth shut while she's arguing with Falstaff. I'd add that arguing with Falstaff is an exercise in futility as he was always quick with the wit. Aries: Not yet, not yet, not yet. Not yet. I'll mention it one more time, for a certain Aries who isn't getting a clue: not yet. Happy birthday to my fine Aries friends having birthdays this week, the Sun and Uranus, Jupiter and a Retrograde Mercury are all ploughing through your sign. That's why I mean, "No, not yet." We're close. We're so very close. We're not there yet. Let's look at this way, it's your birthday, right now, birthday week, birthday month, anyway, soon or for one, just passed, but still, that expectant glee that comes with birthdays, that should be present. Stop. Enjoy the fun stuff. Realize a few people aren't quite geared up in time. I'm just saying, close but not yet. The trigger is Mars, and once Mars gets ensconced in your sign, then we can start to move ahead. But until then? Not yet. Happy birthday! Taurus: Guacamole secret ingredient: Garlic. In an effort to "eat healthy," I've gradually shifted some of my dietary issues. Doubt I'll give up chips and hot sauce, but I can shift to the no-salt, organic blue-corn chips. Then, instead of slathering that with hot sauce, there's guacamole. Avocado is one of the good fruits, full of good fats, minerals and vitamins. I read it on the inter-web, must be true. One grocery store makes this really good stuff, and I was trying to figure out why it was so tasty. Zesty, with a hint of heat, but not too much, low sodium, and so on. I found the secret: big garlic bulbs.
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Fishing Guide to the Stars for the week 3.17.2011

"When he is best, he is a little worse than a man, and when he is worst, he is little betters than a beast."
Shakespeare's Portia in The Merchant of Venice [I.ii.80-2]

New Server. New hardware. Same location. Any problems? Shoot me an e-mail. Pisces: It was an ad, a billboard, greeted me on the highway into San Antonio. It read, "We have LIFT-OFF" (San Antonio Rodeo). The visual was a cowboy, getting airborne, off the back of a large, and probably none-to-pleased bull. Maybe the bull was happy now that this his payload was lifted. As I understand it, the brain of the bull is none too large, so maybe there's not much activity in that cranial space. The cowboy getting jettisoned? I'm sure he was looking for a happy landing. I thought it was clever advertising, playing on various themes. I also thought it was a good way to get around to cautions and cares for Pisces. Careful with the lift-off. See, it really isn't the lift-off part that hurts. No, the pain is caused by the abrupt return the arena's dirt floor. It's not the getting airborne, no, that's not the problem. It's the part when the motions stops. So a lift-off might be good, I'm just worried about the sudden and complete stop that might occur afterwards. Happy birthday and I hope, a happy return.

SXSW (Pisces) Special:
Join now and get a free copy of the ebook, Two-Meat Tuesday.

Aries: I watched, in awe, as a buddy of mine, an Aries buddy, was texting on an old number-pad phone. Following last week's Sagittarius advice, was my guess, sticking with an older model of phone like that. "No, it's not a problem," he explained, "it learns words like 'Zombie, Redneck and Werewolf' pretty fast." I was amused at the words the phone learned and I asked if they were in frequent use. "Surprisingly, yes," my Aries friend answered. I would think, if he was using a smart phone that the texting would be easier. The convergence of phone and inter-web tech sort of demands such a device.
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