Sign: Gemini

Gemini, the Twins, parallel processing, approx. dates: May 22-June 19
Ruled by: Mercury
Keyword: Talk
Element: Air
Quality: Mutable
House: Number Three

Flavor: Just about any flavor will do, but junk food, or its all-natural equivalent, will get their attention quickest.

Grocery store: Gemini is [are] ruled by Mercury. Mercury goes around the Sun every 88 days. Get the picture? Fast moving planet, and most Gemini’s tend to be fast moving as well. Imagine a shopping cart with motorized wheels, like a skateboard with an outboard motor on it. The Gemini will flit through the store, looking at everything, but lingering no place in particular. Gemini’s have some mighty strange eating habits. I knew Vegetarian Gemini once, truly a macrobiotic “careful of what you eat, no animal products, nothing with a face” type. What made this person typically Gemini, was, in the heart of “nuts and fruits” (California), this particular Gemini would eat meat. Big, rare, chunks of cow, obviously under done. Now, take this information and go to the grocery store with your Gemini friend. They will look at everything. I mean, everything. Nothing is beyond their intellectual grasp.

Music: Gemini’s have a strange penchant for the classics. Just about every Gemini I know has some classical music in their collections. I wonder if they really have the attention span necessary to listen to a symphony all the way through, or if they really listen to all that opera. However, this classical stuff will be intermingled with some contemporary material as well. Something with a beat. Trying to narrow down a Gemini’s sense of musical taste is a little difficult. However, an upbeat flute solo, or “The flight of the Bumble Bee” really evokes what a Gemini might be all about.

Walmart after midnight: One word — exhausting. A Gemini is “hell-on-wheels” when it comes to going into the super discount late night store. Nothing is safe. They will play with the toys in the children’s department, they will take a quick spin through the clothes, maybe try on some shoes, ask questions of the poor late staff people, and keep on going. This place is less of a store and more of a playground. Of course, a Gemini frequently approaches life that way.

Brick wall: Gemini is the original adaptable sign of the zodiac. They will tackle this brickwall with a certain zeal and commitment to making sure that the goal is realized, that the wall is breached. However, in typical Gemini fashion, a fixed obstacle that doesn’t yield immediately to one of the 43 different efforts by the Gemini soon loses the Gemini’s attention. They get bored and wander off in search of other adventures. Of course, they did try more routes to get around that wall than any other sign. One of us might pick up where the Gemini left off and find a good solution.

Bait: Gemini: Jointed Minnow — Nothing works better on the Gemini than a super-long, jointed-minnow. It’s pretty much a top water lure, and the Gemini needs some flexibility. So a lure with some flexibility is needed to make the Gemini happy. But unlike the plastic jobs which are way too “flexible,” the jointed minnow lure is big enough to present the Gemini with a challenge, and it offers enough rigidity that the Gemini will surely stay hooked.

Revenge: The easiest way to get revenge on a Gemini is to be boring. It drives a Gemini insane. Best of all, boring for a Gemini can happen in three minutes or less.

Body part: Arms, hands, lungs.

Famous Gemini people: Paula Abdul, Don Ameche, James Arness, Jenny Lee Arness, Chet Atkins, F. Lee Bailey, Adrienne Jo Barbeau, Sandra Bernhard, Pat Boone, Lord Bulwer-Lytton, George Bush, Barbara Bush, Joan Collins, Jacques Cousteau, Courteney Cox, Tony Curtis, Alighrei Dante, Miles Davis, Kat Dennings, Marquis De Sade, Johnny Depp, Bruce Dern, Athur Conan Doyle, Bob Dylan, Clint Eastwood, Ian Fleming, Errol Flynn, John Fogarty, Michael J. Fox, Steve Fromholz, Paul Gaugin, Allen Ginsberg, Cee Lo Green, Bob Hope, Waylon Jennings, Al Jolson, Wynonna Judd, Barry Manilow, Julianna Luisa Margulies, Paul McCartney, Marylin Monroe, Joe Montana, Bill Moyers, Joe Namath, Steveie Nicks, Joyce Carol Oates, Cole Porter, Patricia Quinn Lady Stephens, Prince Rainier, Joan Rivers, Theodore Roethke, Henri Rouseau, John Paul Sartre, Ally Sheedy, Brooke Shields, Nancy Sinatra, Sylvester Stallone, Maureen Stapeleton, Jackie Stewart, Richard Strauss, Igor Stravinsky, Al Unser, Pancho Villa, Wagner, Charles Robert “Charlie” Watts, Dennis Weaver, T.H. White, Walt Whitman, Gene Wilder, Frank Lloyd Wright, William Yeats, and Brigham Young. So is Scott Adams, creator of “Dilbert”.

GeminiMy baby sister is a Gemini, and I’ve studied Gemini all my life. Gemini folk all get the short end of the stick when it comes to this two-faced stuff. Yes indeed, Gemini is the sign of the Twins, hence all the crap they catch about being two-faced. What this term misses completely, though, is the fact that a Gemini is like a finely cut gemstone — multifaceted. One can never be too sure just which angle or facet we are facing. It’s like Gemini is an average American male with a television remote control, surfing his way through the channels of life. 500 shows going at once and the Gemini can keep track of them all. At the same time. Really. In fact, Gemini can be called the LeatherMan Tool of the zodiac — really useful for many applications, but not designed for just one thing.

Or, as Shakespeare would say: “My father named me Autolycus; who being, as I am, littered under Mercury, was likewise a snapper-up of unconsidered trifles.” Autolycus in Shakespeare’s Winter’s Tale [IV.iii.25-27]

I’ve seen a Gemini watch television, read a magazine and listen to music all at the same time. It’s not impossible for them. My sister is one archetype I use for Gemini. She has a degree in biochemical engineering, and she works as a clown. While the two disciplines might seem far apart — kids and molecular biology — there is a connection here. If she didn’t do one, she wouldn’t have done the second. It takes a lot to keep a Gemini engaged. Gemini loves to gossip and talk, especially if the Gemini is talking about his or her favorite subject — the self. Another biological consideration for Gemini is getting a “phone implant” because one of those would work real well with the Gemini who can’t seem to get away from the phone. Gemini is ruled by Mercury, a planet which hurtles around the Sun at an astonishing 88 days per orbit. It reminds me of a Package Delivery person behind schedule. There is a certain kind of frenetic energy one will always associate with a Gemini because the Gemini seems to be afraid to hold still.

Often as not, the “Attention Deficit” syndrome can be linked astrologically with Gemini in a chart. Look at the planet associated with Gemini –Mercury — and perhaps there is some indication of why. The symbol for Mercury looks like a female symbol with little horns sticking up. I like to think the horns are like little antenna, always searching the airwaves. Mercury and Thoth were the gods of communication. They were also the messengers of the gods in classical mythology, the guys with the little wings on their feet. Gemini are fleet of foot, thought, mind, and expression. Gemini can come across as being shallow. Gemini is usually above average intelligence, and they have the ability to demonstrate that. But sometimes, the flaky Gemini lack the follow through for the demonstration. Consistently inconsistent would be a nice way to look at them. Remarkably enough, a lot of Gemini’s end up as paralegals. Multifaceted is perhaps the best description of the personality.

For listening, Gemini would be best off with something like Tchaikovsky’s “Orchestral Suites.”

GeminiYou are the restless one, aren’t you? Think you can sit still long enough to finish reading this? You have a chameleon-like adaptability. Your personality and physical appearance can appear startlingly diverse to different people, and from one time to another. You say what you instinctively know others want to hear. You can consciously or subconsciously imitate of the personality traits or physical appearance of other people. You may be interested, but you may seem emotionally detached. You can exhibit rapid movements. Your marriage can be difficult. You will be talkative to the point of annoyance. You give the impression of mental alertness. You’re probably manually dexterous with some artistic or design skills.

Famous folks with a Gemini Ascendant: Buzz Aldrin, Neil Armonstrong, Russel Baker, Candy Barr, Drew Barrymore, Michael Caine, Julia Child, John Denver, Jeanne Dixon, Aldous Huxley, Mick Jagger, Leonard Nimoy, George Patton, Michelle Pfeiffer, Burt Reynolds, Diana Rigg, Charlie Sheen, Dylan Thomas, Peter Wolf and Loretta Young.

GeminiEager, eager, eager. Talkative, mentally alert, innately curious, constantly seeking stimulation, and always eager to share information, that’s you. But you don’t always get the facts straight and never seem to pay attention to the details. So there is this duality where you can be outwardly happy but inwardly harbor great feelings of loneliness. Duplicity isn’t always nice. You probably love secrets, mysteries, and puzzles. You probably have a sensitive nervous system, but it would give a you a bad case of nerves if we talked about it. You are an avid reader and jump to conclusions, too. You can be emotionally analytical to the point where over-analysis will destroy any physical enjoyment. You probably can’t concentrate on just one thing at a time. This is called multi-tasking. Some variety in your environment is helpful, even healthy.

Famous folks with a Gemini Moon: Jason Alexander, Roseanne Arnold, Joan Baez, Jack Benny, Jeff Bridges, Brett Butler, George Carlin, Davy Crockett, Roger Daltry, Bette Davis, Kirk Douglas, T.S. Eliot, A.J.Foyt, Sigmund Freud, Phyllis George, Goldie Hawn, Abbie Hoffman, Jill Ireland, Tom Jones, Edward Lear, Groucho Marx, Roger Moore, Roy Orbison, Nolan Ryan, Claudia Schiffer, Grace Slick, Tina Turner, Bobby Unser, Jane Wiedlin, and Cale Yarborough.