Week of: Apr. 1-7

Week of: Apr. 1-7

Aries [3/23-4/20]: This is it, dear Aries friend, the penultimate moment before Saturn makes a grand entrance into your sign. What does this mean? It means it’s a Good Friday! And Work! Lots of it! You already are feeling the beneficial effects of your ruler resting in your sign, the almighty red one: Mars. What does the next year hold in store for you? More work! That’s right, and there will also be a lot of travel associated with this work thing. Enjoy the ride, and have a great birthday. In fact, you might want to start the parties now…

Taurus [4/21-5/22]: Have you noticed, despite the calming influence of Venus being Taurus, you have encountered some difficult moments? There seems to be a degree of consternation as you muddle along. Best bets would include reclining postures, carbonated beverages, muted colors and soft music. Relax a little. Don’t worry about the work situation which has made you so uncomfortable recently. Relax some more and let the stress ease its way out of your body…. trust me, I am a professional.

Gemini [5/23-6/21]: Oh boy, oh boy. This is a good time for you. At least, I hope it is a good time for you. Dust off them rose colored glasses because you are going to be needing them throughout the next couple of week, but this idea is particularly highlighted this week. Everything just seems to glow with a new, spring-like sheen. If you can see auras, then you will notices everything seems to shimmer and glow right now. You can detect beauty where ever you turn your attention. Should be good, huh?

Cancer [6/22-7/22]: Watch the pie in the sky money making schemes right now. In fact, consider getting a reading from a qualified fishing guide, as need be. What you’re looking at right now is a time to move ahead with your professional credentials. Add to your resume or portfolio. Now would also be a good time to consider making some moves in the stock market arena. Just be careful that you don’t make any buys based upon strictly visceral attitudes. Do your homework; research that stock buy first!

Leo [7/23-8/23]: I would never, ever suggest that a Leo would be a dull person, but you will note that you will enjoy a greater than average ability to discern problems and see matters more clearly in this next week. That’s right, your intuition is spot on, and your ability to navigate through an otherwise foggy surroundings is heightened. Enjoy this insight while you’ve got it. Leo’s in Houston are, of course, exempt from all prognostications.

Virgo [8/24-9/23]: Talk about some one who feels like they are in love! Or need to be in love. Well, it’s bound to be one of those feelings for you this week. The week starts out on a positive emotional swing, but given your typically Virgo sensibilities, you can see right through the happy fog and get to the bottom line. Still, it is a good time for you and your relationships, either romantic or otherwise. I’ll bet you stay happy most of the week, almost as if a lucky star is shining on you right now. It isn’t but that doesn’t matter, now does it?

Libra [9/24-10/23]: I guess we’re still playing with the relationship stuff this again, aren’t you? Still wondering about that “significant other” and what is going on with them? I wish I had more or better news, but alas, I don’t. Just keep putting one foot in front of the next, especially over the next few days. You are on a roller coaster ride which will end up beneficial, but you emotions might lead you astray later in the week. Try and maintain a sense of balance.

Scorpio [10/24-11/23]: I guess we’re looking at a veritable plethora of bovine byproduct this week! And it will probably hit the fan, too. In plain English, look forward to a time of great mental clarity but insubstantial physical reality to back up those things which you know are true. In fact, this would be a good week to trust no one, especially what some flaky astrologer person says. Your own insight and judgment is sound so be prepared to stand your ground.

Sagittarius [11/24-12/21]: Hug a tree today. The “feminist asteroid” which is characterized by the “big-hipped, hairy legged, tree hugging, sandal wearing, leaflet toting Earth Muffin” is in your sign. You feel like settling down this week, being domesticated like cattle, and searching for that dream of a little house with a white picket fence, a dog in the yard, 2.3 children, and so on. Face some reality here, Sagittarius, it won’t work. You’ve got wings on your feet, but those wings have been clipped recently. Don’t worry, your ability to fly will return.

Capricorn [12/22-1/20]: Right now, you should feel like someone has jumped all over you and given you twenty three odd things to get accomplished. All before noon. Will you make it? Of course, because if you can get some of this stuff done, you can make a fistful of dollars, and, for almost every Cappy we know and love, a fistful of earned income is a good thing.

Aquarius [1/21-2/18]: You realize, of course, that week starts out with another one of those “bangs” which usually indicates a problem has erupted–like a dormant volcano which is no longer dormant. Best bet for dealing with this week? Surf that hot lava! Am I crazy? Maybe, but you might find a good way to deal with rising vicissitudes of life is grab a surf board and some appropriate beach apparel and head on done towards the waves. Me? I would grab a fishing boat, but we all know that I’m a little different.

Pisces [2/19-3/22]: “By all means marry. If you get a good wife you will become happy, and if you get a bad one you will become a philosopher,” Socrates said that. It sure feels like it applies this week, now doesn’t it? Tired of the same old message? Well how about turning all your attention to this romance and relationship stuff now. It’s okay, dear Pisces friend, you can go back to your dreaming now. The world is a better place just because you’re in it. Thanks!

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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