Week of: 8/17-23

"Give me mine angle; we'll to the river: there
My music playing far off, I will betray
Tawny-finn'd fishes; my bended hook shall pierce
Their slimy jaws; and, as I draw them up,
I'll think them every one an Antony,
And say 'Ah, ha! you're caught.'"

Cleopatra in Shakespeare's Antony and Cleopatra, II.v.30-5

Aries : What feels like it is going to start out as a rough week, quickly, and I mean quickly, turns itself around. Faster than you can say, "Road trip," you find yourself heading out with a bountiful new kind of energy, sort of like all of a sudden finding a shiny new quarter, and placing it in a slot machine, and then suddenly hitting a jackpot, and then, turning that jackpot into more money at the craps table, and lucky play on a roulette wheel, and you see how all this can multiple. The real trick this week is knowing when to stop.

Taurus : You might find yourself struggling with friends, relatives, and other people of that ilk this week. These aren't major problems, and there sure is a silver lining to your own, personal rain cloud that you feel hovering overhead. Look on the bright side, a little shade in the August heat is a welcome thing, I hope. And this minor struggle with those folks who keep trying to exert control over you won't escalate into a full scale tug-of-war, even though it feels like it will. Your mental ability, your innate mental ability to address problems gets you out of this mess. I'm not worried about you, and I don't reckon you ought to be too worried either.

Gemini : From a vacuum which felt very much like you were stranded on a desert island, you jump right into the center of attention this week. This should be a welcome relief. By the end of the week, all your troubles and past little difficulties ought to be behind you, and things should be going much better. That little Mercurial Wobble thing has taken care of itself, and you will find that a giant cruise ship is headed your way to let you escape from this island. Better yet, you'll be able to do some trolling on that cruise ship. Who ever thought you could fish from the Love Boat?

Cancer : The unstable, but certainly fun, influences in your romantic life gets better this week because that old trouble maker Mars, moves his bad self out of Cancer and into Leo. Breathe a sigh of relief, and turn your attention to clean up your mobile home. Don't have a mobile home? I find that very unlikely. Most Cancers travel with a little bit of everything, like the concept of "if I can't stay home, I'll take my home with me" (or have you heard this all before?) So this week settles in a little as those two romance things head on over to the next sign, and that means you are going to be spending time at home this. However, it looks like you might be "entertaining" at home this week.

Leo : Let's see what we've got for the Mighty Leo this week, no more Mercury Retrograde, Mars coming in, Venus hanging about a bit, and all that stuff over in Aquarius, exciting you. Now, just because the birthday month is over, doesn't mean that your party atmosphere has changed. Nor does it mean that you are any less likely to want to play. In fact, with the Sun finally heading off into the next sign, you Leo's can get after some serious fun. All that, and the lucky little love planes, too. What Mercury put on hold earlier, is now off the hook, and ready to go!

Virgo : At the very end of this week, or the beginning of next week, depending on your location on the planet (one can never be too exact for a Virgo), the Sun itself goes into your sign. It's a dawn of a new day for Virgo. The problem is that the Sun is a little messy and we know how the Virgo archetype abhors a mess. To confuse matters, there is a still that pesky planet pile up back in Leo, and as a Good Virgo, you still have these deep, dark suspicions about what the immediate future might hold. Relax some because it's really not that bad. Relationships are going to be a bit troubling this week. You feel like you've locked yourself up and you can't seem to get free. Like many aspects of life, this locked up feeling is merely an illusion, but you might want to wait and find that out for yourself.

Libra : Libra's are known far and wide for their excellent taste in art, cuisine, music and theatre. This distinctive quality is further enhanced this week by a gentle, fortuitous arrangement in the morning sky as the Morning star makes a benevolent angle to one of those pesky little asteroids. Turn your attention to matters that matter this week, and seek to help your fellow fishing buddy this week. You have exceptional taste when it comes to picking lures that really work. Here's the hot tip: get the pretty ones. Visual appeal works on fish, too, you know.

Scorpio : I was hoping I could generate a nice a quote for this week, but my online database just couldn't come up with the appropriate metaphor for what you are looking for. See, it's both good and bad. Good, if you are wiling to take some steps at resolving an old conflict. Bad, if you try to ignore this conflict. The conflict itself looks like it is of the romance variety; however,there is no guarantee that this is the case. it could be a work-related thing. But my money's on Scorpio and Romance this week. Which, for a Scorpio, can be both good and bad. And it can be twice as troublesome for the other sign, too.

Sagittarius : Just when you thought that things were warming up, there is a sudden cold draft, running down your spine. It's as if the AC had been broken, and the Repairman has arrived, and now the unit is blowing really arctic air. So much for the good news. And if you did see the AC guy this week, you're probably going to have to see him again, later in the week, because he didn't quite get everything fixed. Remember that cold blast of air which is raising the hair on the back of your neck? It's happening again, sort of a cosmic deja vu....

Capricorn : Sweet escape! Neptune, that large and undefined mass of "something" in your life is back. Just when you thought it was safe to venture forth in the cruel, hard light of the summer sun. There is some nice news here, though, this little visit from Neptune is merely giving you a chance to wrap up some old business, personal business, along the lines of a relationship which was once failed, and probably still is, but you can always give it another whirl. We call this the Neptune effect, here in Austin. Happens all the time to us. It's in the water, don't you know.

Aquarius : Most of he Aquarius folks I run across all have a clear purpose in mind. And most of them know exactly where they are going, and what they are doing. This week, however, the rest of the 11 signs have no clue as to your actions or direction. In fact, you may feel like you have no clue, either. Now, I'm not about to suggest that you are clueless, but it is a good time to spend a few hours alone, staring at a computer monitor or TV gathering your thoughts. Next week? Turn the monitor on. Astrologically, you really do know where you are going, it's just not obvious to us. Nor does it really need to be.

Pisces : I've got a (hopefully) interesting analogy for you guys this week. I was smoking a nice cigar last night, and drifted off to a pleasant reverie. Now, this next morning, I found this half smoked cigar in my ashtray. This is one of those "ten dollar" type of cigars, all-natural, long-leaf filler, hand-made, and so on. When you come face to face with a remaining bit of last night or even last week, don't hesitate to fire that remaining bit of whatever up. It will taste almost as good. And a good cigar will keep the mosquitoes away, too. In fact, some of my cigars will keep just about everything away except Bubba.

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person.

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