12.27.1999

Week of: 12/27-1/2

“All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts.”

Jacque in Shakespeare’s As You Like It, [II.vii.139]

I can’t speak for anyone else, but New Year’s Eve, I’m going to be in a special position, by the breaker box, at the party. At midnight, I’m throwing the breaker, counting to ten, and then turning the juice back on. “Surprise!” I’ll exclaim. I’m sure at least one Virgo will be heavily armed and ready to do battle, though.

Aries : Xmas is over, and the changing of the guards is approaching. There are big things afoot right now. I know you’ve heard it all before, but in this case, it’s a matter of not falling for the hype, especially this week. You’re going to find yourself a little disgruntled with work. It’s like having a fishing a buddy who just doesn’t quite pull his own weight. He shows up a few minutes late, he’s not always completely dressed, and in the dark hours before the dawn, he’s still pulling on an extra shirt or spilling coffee. It’s a week when you keep running into people just like this, and you keep asking yourself if you should be hanging around these guys. As long as there’s a new year around the corner, a new decade, a new century and all that, you can consider some sweeping changes this week.

Taurus : While everyone else is looking at the big picture, let’s turn your Taurus attention to the fine details, the minute little things which usually a require a Virgo-like eye to discern. By looking at the fine print, being aware of the minor details, observing the subtle nuances in inflection and speech patterns, listening for the small changes in a note or a voice, you’re going to open up new avenues of your own perception. And what will this lead to? It looks like it will lead to certain realizations and revelations. Nothing could be better when you’re wrapping up one big day, and you have another big party coming up.

Gemini : I know you’ve been planning on this week for a long time. In fact, it’s been such a long time in your planning phase that you might have forgotten about what you were planning about. I know that these plans could stretch back as far as the beginning of December. That’s pretty far-sighted for a Gemini. I think you ought to be congratulated on being so far-reaching in your plans. Now, if you can just remember what it is that you told them. There was this Gemini once, I knew her well, and she has a photographic memory But even her photos are going to fade a little bit in this weeks astrological haze. If you find yourself irritated and short tempered with other folks this week, go back and check your notes to see that you remember the myriad of details you were going to look after BEFORE you embark on the big party thing. Remember those plans you laid.

Cancer : I love this when it happens to a Cancer. Couldn’t happen to a more deserving sign. It’s finally time for something good to happen. Of course, there’s always the big celebration, and along with the celebration, there are prophesies of doom. According to some pundits, we are looking at the end of civilization as we know it. I seriously doubt that this is going to happen to you. In fact, the only thing I can see happening that might be a little unlucky is a the fact that the government might lose a few of your records. It’s not like you’re really going to miss the data from 1982 or 1983 too much, now is it? So it’s a good week, and as events transpire, you find yourself in a lucky position, perhaps in more than one way, if you know what I mean.

Leo : I know that the are few of you lovely Leo types who are complaining that there is nothing good happening right now. If I could just convince you to abandon your negative attitude, if only for a week, then you would notice that things aren’t really so bad. to be most certain, there are some dire prophesies floating around right now. Some of the numbers people would have us believe that the end of the world is right around the corner. While there ‘s a little, rather logical, side of your brain which wants to follow this number game, you will find that it lead to an infinite number of possibilities. And I hardly think that you need to spend this week with so much thinking going on. It’s that little bit of time and space between Xmas and New Years that you need to worry about. If I were you, right now, I would party just so you can be in good shape for the big blow out.

Virgo : For a change, I want my most excellent Virgo friend to take a look at the big picture. For a change, step back and disassociate yourself with mundane, every day action. If you can gather yourself up and look at the over view of the situation, you will realize that there is something you’ve been working on for a long time that’s just about to pay off. The problem with this pay off is that it doesn’t hit this week. It’s like having the lottery numbers to next week’s big jackpot. That means, you can hit it big next week. I know that you want good news about love and money this week, but the way I see it, it looks like it’s a more than a week off. Of course, my timing might be a little on the rough side, I’ll accept that point. Still, it looks like there is something fixin’ to bust loose in a big way, in about 10 days. Got that? Heard it here first.

Libra : It’s time to wrap up a few loose ends right now. I know that it’s a prediction which could be said for everyone, but in your case, you’ve got the little extra dose of energy necessary to finish up a few odd tasks which you wanted to get down by the end of the year. I realize that we’re all facing this, in one way or another, but it’s of particular importance to a Libra this week. The moon is in a position to influence this, you know. And listening to the circadian rhythms of the planets right now might help with this “wrapping up” that you need to attend to. Perhaps if you were to turn it into a game of some kind, a little set of goals which are easy to accomplish, you might find this a series of smaller, easier tasks. In fact, I would suggest that you work out a sweet reward for getting to every goal you set this week.

Scorpio : I’ve got my long tresses down right now, stretching halfway across my back, the curls floating down. On the patio, there’s a cow’s skull with long horns, and a few fishing poles underneath it. And there’s a certain amount of calm in this scene. On the jukebox, a sad country song by a hillbilly is playing. It speaks of death, transformation, and broken hearts. Out the artist’s angst, there is a sense of hope. I’m not suggesting that this scene is for everyone, but for the Scorpio this week, there’s a degree of hope which can be drawn from a sad lament. Move from the sad lament by some country star to a sense of rebirth. Ah, c’mon, it’s that time of year. Say good bye to the old, and welcome the new with open arms. It’s like the next song on the jukebox, a much snappier number. You’ll hear it before the end of this week.

Sagittarius : It’s no use baby, calling my name just isn’t go to work this week. Imagine sweet smell of patchouli drifting up, as if from an incense burner. Then imagine a pair of cowboy boots. Now, in Austin, this isn’t such an odd combination. However, in every other place in the world, it might be a strange set of elements drawn together. Maybe you’ve never watched a sandal clad female two stepping with a cowboy. It could happen. This week is going to being just such obvious opposites together in your life. Celebrate the diversity. Fortunately, this isn’t such an odd combination around here, but it’s the rest of you that I’m worried about. And this week, it’s really a little too late to call. Sorry about that.

Capricorn : You’re heading into a new century with lots of hope. After what you’ve been through, and with a few of you are celebrating birthdays right now, it’s a time to be hopeful. I’m not too worried about you at all. In fact, while there might be concerns about clocks and timing of events, if I only had more Capricorn in my chart, I would be getting ready for the big celebration in style. You’re going to won’t to get yourself into a location where you can celebrate the New year for several days running. After all, if you just want proof that world isn’t going to end tomorrow, look at Australia because it’s already tomorrow there. So get ready to celebrate every hour on the hour.

Aquarius : There’s an old joke which has made the rounds of the joke lists and the fax lists before, it’s about how many of a certain sign it takes to change a light bulb. For Aquarius in the version that I saw time and again, it started out with “First you have to understand that electricity is energy…” and this was an obvious play on the intellectual side of the Aquarius. It’s that heady, intellectual side that I want to appeal to this week. Relax a little from your head over heels rush that has been going on. Let’s look at some mythology, according to some, we are entering the Age of Aquarius. According to others, it’s just another week. Mars has been in your sign for a spell now, and he’s fixin’ to leave which means that you can begin to tone down the excitement. Or maybe it’s just been the activity. Any way you care to look at it, though, you begin to get a break, later this week.

Pisces : I realize that patience might not be one of your virtues, especially this week. But from what I can see, and I keep rotating the astrology dial around again and again, all I turn up is patience. No matter how I dial you in, I can promise that the coming year, the coming decade, the coming century all have some extra fun in store. that’s the good news. The problem being is that cosmic timing is like fishing, both require a degree of patience in order to get there from here. So to get what you’re after, this week, act like you know what is going on. Give them a nod of your head, agree, at least in principle, and tell them, “yes, but can I get back to you later….” This sort of committed noncommittal answer will help you get ahead in the coming few weeks. I realize we should all look at the big picture, but right now, just pretend like you have that big picture in crystal clear focus.

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in a trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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