Something witty should be inserted here.
Breaking the rules is always important. But looking at website numbers, performing a statistical analysis, and finding some useful guidelines, then trying to see if that works? Even better.
If something’s broken, let me know!
Otherwise, just a little clean up around here, some backend tweaking, just a minor oil change and tune up, replaced a worn out belt, checked the tension on the timing chain. Yes, the website does have a timing chain, although, more modern websites would use a timing belt made out of some kind of super-duper plastic-nylon-rubber compound. Be nice if I could get a desmodromic drive for this place, but we make due with what we can.
Raw numbers: front page weighs less than 10 kb, 9 kb to be precise, and the pay page is a mere 6 kb. Load times at a purported 28K modem? 4 seconds and 3 seconds. Just under the wire over the wire.
Sustained metaphor
Some months ago, I took a look at an upcoming scope and I hit upon – what I thought – was an ideal sustained metaphor. A theme that could run all the way through the scopes, for a whole 12 signs? I’ve tried it before, and I do this for my own amusement. Is it going to work? Gets a little repetitive, after a while.
I don’t think I pulled this one off, but I did get the column finished in a timely and workmanlike manner. The ultimate test? When it goes live, one day in the future. Either folks will love or they’ll hate it. It was an amusing attempt. I thought the idea was brilliant – until I tried.
I don’t think I pulled this one off, but I did get the column finished in a timely and workmanlike manner. The ultimate test? When it goes live, one day in the future. Either folks will love or they’ll hate it. It was an amusing attempt. I thought the idea was brilliant – until I tried.
Unrelated:
I was pulling a four-inch Margarita (chartreuse) curly-tail grub on a 3/8 ounce weedless jighead through the water, more to watch its action than to really catch a fish. In the lake’s clear water, I was admiring the way the tail fluttered. A tiny, itty-bitty black bass attacked it. Twice. Violently. As violent as a three-inch fish can – he was so tiny, he couldn’t get his large mouth around the tail, much less up to the hook. But he did try! Love that, fish with attitude: “Looks good, I’ll eat it. Even if it is bigger than me.”
“It’s my one night free, Virgo dearest, your call.”
I tricked my buddy into calling me back, suggesting, since I hadn’t seen her car in Shady Acres for the last few days, maybe she’d been abducted by space aliens. She called right back, assuring me she hadn’t been abducted, and she blew off her previous engagement to dine with me. But between the call on her ride home and me arriving at the front door of her trailer, there was a little Mercury Mayhem.
“I knew I was getting cocky,” she said, “thinking I got out of that Mercury Retrograde with no scratches. But when I went to the mail box today? After work? After I talked to you? Nothing but NSF notices. Then I thought someone hijacked my bank account. After 20 minutes on hold, I got it figured out, the State didn’t do my direct deposit.”
Curra’s for some dinner, just the nicest Sagittarius waitress, sure do love them Sagittarius girls, and a couple of pint-sized “Horni Presidente” margaritas? Did the trick, at least calmed that Virgo down. Tequila, (something) “Presidente” brand Tequila?
“Tequila soothes the chapped mind,” I said.
“So I kept assuring the bank rep, the State of Texas hadn’t gone out of business, and I hadn’t been fired,” she said.
Late in the evening, I had to promise to take her boyfriend fishing, while I fished and she chatted with said boyfriend on her phone. She was chatting via the phone, he wasn’t like, on the phone. I don’t know, he was talking into his phone, I’ll assume.
Couple of nibbles on the fishing line, but nothing on the hook. Might’ve been that one little guy again.
