“To see sad sights moves more than hear them told.”
Shakespeare’s “The Rape of Lucrece” (1324)
Coming soon: the astrofish.net/marsminute/
Aquarius: There’s an exercise I try and use on my clients, especially in personal readings. “Give me a BLUE SKY scenario.” Dream the dream, dream big. Think large. Pick three aspects about your life that you don’t like. I don’t mean broad stuff like “career,” I mean more pointed material like “If I could just drop those pesky, last five pounds…” The five pounds, that’s a target that I’m talking about.
“I want a job where I get to be more creative, tap into my true potential as an artist…” Again, a nice, pointed, and specific target. That’s what I want. List three. Now. I’ll wait.
Back again? I need you to be more specific on those three items, drill down to what the real issue is. Hard to do this in a single horoscope, as I usually talk this through in a reading, but here’s the deal, out of those three, look at your list again, you’ll find that there is one that you can take immediate action on, this weekend. Now, even. Of the three, pick one and start. Soon. Soon means “before Kramer’s next horoscope.” Can’t complain if you don’t take some kind of Aquarius action. List three, hit one item. This week, the next seven days.
Available now: the Mars Minute.
Pisces: Next week, like, right after the big, fake romance holiday? Soon as that’s over, just as it’s time to sweep up the shattered pieces of hearts, as soon as the weekend is over, then Pisces starts, in earnest. That’s good, no? Yes, it is good. There’s a host of minor planetary activity moving into Pisces. Now, let us put this to good use.
I’d like you to think about one person who did you an egregious harm. Someone who crossed the sweet, gentle and delicate Pisces. Someone who took advantage of your good nature. Someone pissed you off, and I mean, royally pissed you off. I’m not even a Pisces, not a drop of Pisces in my chart, and I’m getting incensed at what that damn fool did to you. My blood is about to boil, and it’s not even me. Here’s what’s up. Forgive and put it aside. Let’s revisit that hurt, one last time, then think about a way to heal it a little. I’m thinking a good day at the shooting range, putting large caliber holes in paper targets as a healing gesture, but your Pisces mindset might differ. As this weekend rolls over into next week, one action, I’m not sure what it is, not sure in each and every individual case, but a symbolic action would help you out. A lot.
Aries: I recently did a reading for an Aries client. Lot of Aries in that chart. Here’s what I suggested, over the course of the reading, my advice — wait six weeks. Now, as a horoscope, and as horoscopes go, here’s what I’m suggesting to you, my fine Aries friend. Wait three weeks. That advice? It was timed for a very specific chart. In your case, in the case of what I see in the chart in front of me at this moment? Give it a couple of weeks. Wait. Go slow. Take it easy. Calm down. Stop. Pause. Then stop again. Venus is in Aries, makes you feel good. You feel fine. Everything else is in the sign that comes before you, namely Pisces. Mostly Pisces. Between that and Mars? Give it a rest. Pause. Need about three weeks. Which is why, the advice I first quoted? Six weeks. I figure, if I asked for six weeks, a good three weeks might be had. I know my Aries. Love all of ya’ll, but you don’t have the long attention and patience, not usually. Which is what this is about. As long as everything is stacked in Pisces, we can’t change that, as long as there’s a Pisces clog in the Aries chart, a little time is best. What you were planning to get done this week? Might take longer. Like a “good six weeks,” huh. Which, read closely, might be three weeks. Can’t change it. Give me six weeks.
Taurus: I always imagine that Taurus is a sensual sign. I learned to shop, from a Taurus girl. She taught me to feel the object before purchase. Grab it, fondle it, see which item is softer, smoother, rougher, whatever the desired texture is, make sure it gets felt. Have to touch stuff. I was thinking about that sense of touch, feeling textures, running fabric between my fingers, as I thought about the upcoming week in Taurus. Touch, feel, gently prod. I kept getting this image of a Taurus, feeling the edges of perceived obstacle. Push a little here, tap it there, see if there is a soft spot, perhaps one point is weaker than another, as possible place of entry. However, here’s the important part about this message and image, it’s matter of feeling along with the tips of your fingers. Not striking, not “hitting,” not bludgeoning your way through. You won’t get to the part that is easiest to breach, not with brute force. It’s a matter of delicate, soft and sensitive Taurus training, use that, to figure out where the weak point is, and then, you can use all the brute force you want. But first, gentle, softly, easy now….
Gemini: As a laconic, loping Sagittarius, I won’t have this problem. I will tend to look like a horse, and I’ll tend to smirk at the problem. As a Gemini, though, I can see this is going to be a big problem, next couple of days. The pressure, it’s less from an external source like a boss or mate, and more from an internal source, like all of your Gemini selves.
“What do you mean?”
“You know perfectly well what he means, and you shouldn’t be wasting time reading this silly horoscope.”
Dialogue. Not monologue, dialogue for at least two of the Gemini voices. Clever, huh. The problem is one of those Gemini voices is going to start to screech, kind of like a fan belt on an older model truck, just as that fan belt is about to go, every time you accelerate, the eerie screeching gets higher. What is happening, part of the internal Gemini brain is reacting badly to perceived deadlines set by another portion of the Gemini brain, and this loops back on itself, creating a rather discomfiting tension. Bummer. I look and see stuff in Pisces and that pesky Mars thing, but call it what you want. The biggest problem? No one will share your urgency. I’m suggesting you let go of some of that self-generated motivational talk, which, in turn, is making you more worried that you’re behind further than you want to be. Quit trying to do too much.
Cancer: “Is Mercury Retrograde?” Me: not at all, direct in Pisces at the moment. “You’re sure?” Me: Yes, I’m pretty sure that it is not the real source of your ire. “Not Mercury? Then what is the problem?” Me: Mars, backwards in your solar 3rd House, can make it feel like Mercury is backwards. But it’s not. The mental confusion, though, frequently associated with that pernicious little planet’s retrograde action, that’s rather similar feeling. Similar Cancer/Moon Child sentiment now. Huh. Next ten days, this gets worse before it gets better. However, after reading that, you are now aware. There is no caution about starting new stuff, the big problem comes in joint ventures. Other people. It’s them, not you. It’s a problem. I used to suggest doubling up on efforts, but now? I suggest triple efforts are required. Repeat three times, in order to get the message across. Hear me? Three times. Have to say it three time. Thrice as much effort to be understood. It works, just takes three times to make sure you are understood. Three times. Not once, but three times. How many is that?
Leo: One of the best times for bass fishing, or for Bass Fishing, is early in the Texas morning. Mid-February is strange weather patterns, leaves the fish confused, but they are getting hungry because it’s spawn season soon enough. Sort of a Micropterus Salmoides version of spring break. Typically, most of the lakes I fish are cooling ponds for power plants. One early February morning, I’m out there, scooting across the lake in a fast boat, with an eery mist rising up from the lake’s surface. The water can be much warmer than the air, cold winter morning. Makes for a bizarre set of conditions. Fishing is fishing, though, and not to be missed. There’s a point where skill and experience plays a big part of the game. With the heavy mist, like I said, rising from the lake’s surface, it’s a game where feel and feedback is more important than the usual visual clues.
I have to pay close attention to the way the fishing line itself feels, perhaps a faster tip on the fishing pole? Perhaps a denser fishing line? Depends on the lakes and conditions, but there are little equipment adjustments to make. February fishing? Sure. That’s not what this is really about, though, it’s about making those finite, infinite, minuscule adjustments to your normal way of dealing with what happens day-to-day. What I did? Very simple, I switched out a fishing line on the favorite pole for that lake. Didn’t change reel, bait, or nothing. Just the line. I switched from a “stretchy” type to a slightly more stout monofilament. One, simple adjustment. All it takes for Leo to land — for the mighty Leo to catch whatever it is you desire.
Virgo: My methodology is reasonably simple. I develop a theory. That theory becomes my hypothesis. I look at data, like planet location and measure that against behaviors. I can further refine and adjust that original hypothesis, or I can junk it all together and start over with a different set of ideas. Test, retest, assemble data points, draw conclusions based upon available data. Then, in some kind of a blind experiment, test that hypothesis against subject data that has no recollection of what the test is about. Blind test. I’ve done this, followed this procedure, over the years and I’ve developed my own “school of thought” about matters astrological.
As a Virgo, you have a similar, if not identical, methodology. Theory, hypothesis, test, evaluate, refine thesis, retest, evaluate, test again. With Mars where he is, there is a problem with this way of working, there’s a very-Un-Virgo-like tendency to leap past some of the steps, might try and jump to a new idea without adequate testing and evaluation. That’s a problem, as you can be like me and shoot off your mouth before the brain has properly evaluated the incoming data. The steps are laid, logically, in order, for a reason. I’m not saying you have to follow all the steps, but they are there, in order, for a reason.
Libra: I was in school, years and years ago, I remember coveting another student’s work. There was a certain kind of mystery and artfulness to a particular piece, and I liked it. I didn’t like it enough to steal the idea, or, swipe the concept. Peer-driven reviews probably work in a similar way. There was a crass element to the piece, but then, there was also a finely-tuned hand at work, as well. Execution, that’s what worked, execution. Well-executed. That’s an aspect that I can try and emulate. Which I do. My style, though, is much different. Instead of stealing another person’s style, instead of giving in and looking like everyone else? Borrow a page from me. Do it your way. The Libra Way. The Libra Way is better, you know. The biggest obstacle, as this week unfurls, the hardest problem you’re facing is not falling into a loop where you think back, and then you think, “He (or she) did it better than I ever could.” Not true! It’s matter of emphasizing your own, innate style. Embrace it. Make it “yours.”
Scorpio: I’m, I’d like to think, fairly transparent with my fears and phobias. Fear of the cold, fear of hunger, those should be obvious. Afraid to run out of coffee? That’s one, too. One doctor told me to stop drinking coffee for a while, or cut back, and anyway, that’s not going to work, because of the way I’m wired. I did try and work around the “no coffee” thing with tea, but after a while, I started with just a cup in the morning, and the rest is easy to figure out. That’s one fear I didn’t overcome. As a Scorpio, there’s a very secret and private fear that you have.
I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS.
Just to make sure, as good as I can be, I still don’t know what that big secret you’ve got, I’m completely in the dark, as to what it is. I’d say your secret is safe with me, but then, since I don’t know what it is, that secret is even safer. The real question, do you want to tell me what that secret is? Probably not, as I’m a talkative Sagittarius. We’ll leave it at that. The issue isn’t me knowing, it’s you keeping the secret. I’d be extra careful about writing it down, or who you talk to, or what you Tweet, as you’re loquacious enough to accidentally give it away. Just a warning.
Sagittarius: Before Xmas, I dropped off a pair of boots to be repaired. I found a cobbler on the south side of town; he does just excellent work. Doesn’t speak much English. Postured himself as speaking no English whatsoever, but I noticed he would track anything I said in my native tongue, as well as my broken, barroom Spanish. Boots were to be ready in a few weeks, as he does this thing that completely revives a worn and broken pair of cowboy boots. There are patches, inside and out, new soles, heels, revitalizes the leather with some kind of “shoe milk” grease, a major overhaul. Cheaper than buying new boots, that’s for sure. However, that language and sometimes, I get sense that I’m being played. Last time I dropped off a pair of boots? Before Xmas? I’ve been back, every other week, since then, and he smiles at me, one time his wife was there, she speak perfect, if accented English, and one time his son was there, again, not a problem, but the boots were never ready. “Saturday.” I started to wonder, just which Saturday? This one. Boots will be done. Something that got started before Xmas? Finally gets completed. For me? It’s like a new pair of shoes. The biggest problem, as Sagittarius, our challenge for the rest of this week is not looking too impatient when that task takes a lot longer than we planned.
Capricorn: I don’t want to talk about my feelings, but that’s what this is all about. How do you feel about that? My preferred answer, it goes a little like this, “I feel it is stupid to talk about my feelings, and it makes me sad.” Any therapists who are worth their weight in billable hours can see that comment as a gold-mine. What this about, in the ensuing time-frame, the span of this horoscope, as a Capricorn, there are emotional issues that are going to bubble to the surface. You’re also going to find that some of this “feels” uncomfortable. A confrontation, an issue, drama of one sort or another, something. This is really all Pisces stuff, and really, it’s all emotional effluvia, not necessarily real. Again, back with armchair pop psychology therapy stuff, “But my feelings are real!” Yes, yes they are. I’m sure you feel that way — AT THIS MOMENT. That’s the point. That’s the kicker. That’s the little hook in this horoscope, these are fleeting emotions, and at the end of the horoscope, as the Moon finally exits Pisces, these (issues, people, places, things) are no longer the big deal. You’ll feel differently. Then. It’s like a water color wash on a piece of paper, it changes shades.
So I wanted it yesterday? Soon, brother, soon.