Horoscopes by the Fishing Guide to the Stars starting 2.14.2013

“‘Tis good to be sad and say nothing.”

Shakespeare’s As you Like It [IV.i.8]

Happy VD!

Name that Moon:
See Pluto Rocks!
(Still should be planet, but what do I know?)

Aquarius: Love is in the air, especially if you believe the material circulating around — and around and around. Mars is one “love” planet and he’s in Pisces. Venus is another “love” planet, and she’s in Aquarius. Makes for a weird combination. As an Aquarius, there should be a rich, interior monologue, even now. There are a few Aquarius birthdays, but next week, the Sun moves into Pisces. All this Pisces adds a strange, watery element to the Aquarius filters. In part, I’d suggest giving in to the mawkish, slightly overdone sentiment of the season. As a personal note for that one Aquarius, might want to call this, “The Silly Season,” as we approach that full moon. It’s possible to analyze, over-think and conceptualize what’s happening. My suggestion Just give into that “Pisces Flavor” and enjoy yourself.

For that one Aquarius, Happy Birthday, dear one!

Pisces: The time for romance is now. Ratchet up the romantic efforts. Pretty simple? “9 Ways to Improve your Love Life.” Also? “11 Sure Fire Ways to keep him interested — in the bedroom!” Fictional titles from articles that would help the Pisces, even now. “The things he wants — but won’t tell you!”

I’ve noticed, over the years, that such lurid article titles seem to catch eyes, and I’ll suppose, because they are still in use to this day, sell magazines. Other merchandise, too, I’m sure. Sex sells. More important? The promise of sex sells. As a Pisces, there’s strongly prurient flavor, it’s like a scent, and that is an influence you can’t seem to shake. I’d crank it up, some. I’m hardly recommending those magazine articles, but the titles ought to give you a good place to start. What your mate — potential mate — wants. You’re a Pisces, I know you can deliver.

Aries: “Special adaptor, on SALE NOW!” It was an ad, something from a computer list. Very amusing, as far as I was concerned, all I saw was a minimal graphic representation of a plug that was a male end, maybe a quarter of inch of plastic then a female end. It was advertised as “Male to Female adaptor.” It was between half and three-quarters of an inch in length. I can think of a example of a computer installation where a half-inch extension for one of the cables might be useful.

As toy, it could be cool.

As a minimalist geek, though, it was useless.

What amused me most was the title was longer than the actual item. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that a “male to female” adaptor was kind of a joke. Had to be. In certain tenuous situations, an extra half or three-quarters of an inch might be useful. However, the whole thing ticked and tickled my sense of the absurd. I was looking at the planets. One planet, really. Like me, you’ve got to look at the absurdity of the situation, the device, the item.

Taurus: Because I’m self-employed, I rarely sit through mindless meetings with PowerPoint presentations. I’ve used a program like that, once or twice, to pull together lecture material for teaching astrology, but even then, I can’t stand the thought of another presentation. What it must be like to sit through one of those meetings? If power corrupts, then PowerPoint corrupts absolutely? Sit through one more boring presentation, and you’ll know, for sure. The cure to this is to get up and leave.

Not a very Taurus-like answer to this week’s question, but think about it.

Get up and leave.

Gemini: Anymore, I don’t get a chance for the most idyllic and laconic of fishing (styles). I rarely, these days, get to spend idle moments on a dock, flipping lures and live bait into a body of water, be that lagoon, bay, lake, or even creek. My remorse is not matched as I’ve journeyed further and further afield to find suitable places to fish. So it was with great joy, it was a warm January afternoon, that South Texas sun was shining brightly, and I was fishing from a dock, again. Sort of a weird thing, like, after so many years on boats, to be back on dry land. I watched the waves and I could feel myself rolling with the waves even though the dock was anchored. Pier. Wasn’t so much a dock as a pier, anchored firmly in the lake’s bed. However, I kept rolling with the waves, and I’m sure I looked a little bizarre, sort of bobbing and weaving on a solid structure. The strong Pisces influence is like that, you bob and weave, even though there is no call for it.

Cancer: I was publicly mocked, one time, more than once, for my images of me, with fish. On the site, buried, now, some place. I was — she tried — to humiliate me because I was showing pictures of barely legal bass, sunfish and other catch. Not all good. Here’s the turning point, though, I was fishing whereas the people who mocked me? At work, at a boring job, at a computer whereas I was on the lake, fishing. Maybe not great fish. But I was fishing. Someone is out to mock your gentle Cancer/Moon Child self. Keep this in perspective. Small fish are better than no fish.

The final rejoinder? “Yeah, I was jealous, you were fishing…”

The (mighty) Leo: As a Sagittarius, I’m a little leery of using the term “relationship” because that word, it’s implied meaning to me, there’s more baggage than I want. Or more than I can stand. It’s not a good thing. Scares the bejebbers out of me. As a much younger person, it really bothered me, that term, “relationship” because the implication was lack of freedom. Restrictions, rules, monogamy, monotony, marriage, death. Now, in Leo Land, this isn’t the case, and now, in Leo Land, this isn’t what I’m trying to address. You know my bias, keep that in mind, but I’m not as great as a Leo. This is about a relationship, and I wonder, I have to think this way, it might not about the romantic relationship, but another type of personal-bonding-interaction. Like relationship between two guys who fish together often. No dull, not boring, not riddled with negative connotations at all.

Virgo: There is a wondrous amount of planets in opposition to Virgo. Not bad, not good. Not anything. Use this energy wisely. I was discussing a business point with a colleague. Has to do with strategy and client interaction. I had one opinion while my buddy had a hard-line — and different — point of view about the situation. The question, at hand. I let it go. Some points really aren’t worth arguing over, at all. Two opinions, and although I was 100% correct, only time would prove this so. I waited. Six months went by. Same colleague, same point, only, this time, after the time had slipped passed? My buddy came around to seeing things my way. It wasn’t an argument, it wasn’t a big deal, it was a simple discussion. Time, patience and lack of outward confrontation proved I was, indeed, right. Correct on that point, anyway. As a Virgo, you’re right on this point. And like me, you can wait, which will be very hard to do in the next few days, but waiting? You can have that sweet satisfaction of knowing, you were right.

Libra: I was with a Libra, not long ago, having an early breakfast before an engagement. Love me some Libra and love me some early morning TexMex breakfast, and on an early January morning? When it was so cold out? Rather enjoyable. When we were first seated, the waitress came up behind me, and her first greeting was, “Hello ladies.”

That was followed by realization of her mistake and copious, effusive apologies followed. Standing, I’m pretty sure there’s no mistaking me for a dude. Male. I’ve worn my hair long for over two decades. What’s odd, this has only happened a few times, and only in the last few years.

The message for, if it isn’t obvious, you’re like me. The waitress, the server, the valuable service person is going to make a mistake, this next few days.

I recommend your Libra self follows my lead: laugh it off.

Happy Valentine’s Day, hope you get breakfast with a favorite Sagittarius(1), too.

(1) Or currents favorite sign.

Scorpio: Most of the Scorpios, well, all of them, that I know are armed with a laser-like focus. Get those Scorpio sights set on one target? That laser-guided Scorpio instinct kicks into high-gear and nothing will stop the Scorpio. Intent on the hunt, the chase, the capture, typical Scorpio stuff. Love them. Adore that ability to exclude all details. I’m not a Scorpio, I’m flaky and very-Sagittarius astrologer. Means I can observe and report back with some degree of, not so much detachment, more like an amused, “Will you look at that” attitude.

Here’s the deal: you feel like there is a single objective you should pursue. There is. You feel like there is a single goal that is most important. It is. You figure that all your capable Scorpio resources should be marshaled in one direction. They should. You see a bright, shiny object outside of this single goal-oriented direction and you pause. You want to wander away and look. Stop. Stay focused. Stay on task. There will be a myriad of distractions, all minor. Don’t get distracted. Saturn suggests that you still focus on that one thing.

Sagittarius: There’s always a disconnect. In a hotel someplace, I passed by the “gym,” or exercise room, or whatever those places are called. I looked in, over the empty and unused exercise machines, there was a single, large-screen TV. In the corner of the screen, it said, “The Food Channel.” Right. That was just some sort of cruel joke. The food channel runs these long-standing culinary stars, and stories about great restaurants and great places to have fabulous desserts, and it’s all about the food adventure.

Food channel in the gym. The image is a typical overweight American, running like a rat in cage, on a treadmill, chasing that material on the TV screen. There is a disconnect to Sagittarius. There I just thought the Food Channel, on the TV, I just figured that was the same thing. In the gym. Could be cruel to some.

Capricorn: “You believe me, right?” It was a buddy, describing an improbable situation that involved one of his lovers, the backseat of his car, and similar amorous adventures.

“You believe me, right?” My friend, he’s an XL-size. Good fishing buddy. Typical Texas raconteur, as well. I also know, when he starts one of his tales with, “True story, no lie,” that is probably a piece of fiction. So he asked, again, halfway through this last tale, “You believe me, right?”

Big guy, small car, yeah, not so much.

You believe me right?

I feel good about this.