Horoscopes starting 9.14.2017

    “In nature’s infinite book of secrecy
    A little I can read.”
    The Soothsayer in Shakespeare’s
    Antony & Cleopatra (1.2.5-7)

Horoscopes starting 9.14.2017



The Virgin

I read a short Shakespeare passage, part of a monologue, into the camera, trying for that weekly missive. I had just listened to the play on tape, so that play and its passage, was fresh in my mind. Also, in my mind, I could do a better job than the voice actor who did that one part. However, when I started to read it aloud, after three tries, I realized I was still reading it one line by one line, and not the way it was intended, or the way I suppose it was intended. It’s not like this intro quote, which is supposed to read like that. The poetry provides a natural break, like it’s supposed to be. This week is about preparing. Prepping, get ready, get the ducks in a row, or, for me, the fish will be hitting the sloughs and troughs down at the coast soon. So I need to be ready. I’ll drag out my old spin cast gear, and make sure the salt from last spring hasn’t jammed gears.

I shifted from Shakespeare being read aloud to prepping for fall fishing. Both don’t require practice and preparation, but both benefit from practice and preparation.

As a Virgo? This week, getting ready for Monday’s Lunar Equation? Preparation is key. Fishing or reciting poetry. Either way, prepare.


There’s a simple, short process I use to determine if a prospective client is worth spending time with. A quick way to determine if, how, when we should proceed. Or, in come cases, when we shouldn’t bother to push forward with any more contact. As hard as it might be to understand, for Libra, there are some people that I grate on — my attitude, attire, something doesn’t work right. I’ll shrug, it happens. My process?

“What’s your birthday?” Simple question. Sometimes, speaks to a certain vintage, “What, like my sign? Are you hitting on me?” No, I’m not hitting on you, I’m not flirting, I’m just being who I am, and if the question makes no sense, or doesn’t resonate? Then I don’t need to waste any time boring or annoying that person with my worldview, and what is going on with Libra.


It’s my “qualifying” move. Sales guy was trying to sell me something in which I had no interest — whatsoever. He wasn’t getting it. Not a product I would use, and therefore? I had no need of. His qualifying question, he should realize, he was spinning his wheels. I’ve been at this game of life for a while, and I have some verbal dexterity. As a Libra, follow me on this, as Libra, think about those qualifying statements. That quick way to assess a situation, and decide, then, is it worth the time? Or not. Quick questions, maybe just one, and unlike that sales guy, your Libra self doesn’t have to annoy the folks who aren’t interested.



A fetching young lady was — stellar looks — was inquiring about my services. She rattled off a Scorpio birthday; Scorpio is my Achilles Heel, especially Scorpio femme fatales, with that smokey allure, and hidden visage, hooded with allure and intrigue. Yeah, so not happening. She was working it, that little sway to her step, thinking she’d get something for free. For starters, I’m way too old for her. For seconds, I’m Scorpio compliant, but not able to keep up with a Scorpio. Third, this is my business, and she was fishing for free stuff. Bat the eyes. Sashay. Yeah, didn’t work on me. I noticed, I was flattered, but I was not swayed.

Flirting to get what you want is usually a good Scorpio trick. Came close, but didn’t work — not on me. I’ll admit I’m more susceptible to Scorpio, male and female, mostly female, but hey, some of the guys are just so cute, and never mind, this isn’t about me, this is about not getting what you want with typical Scorpio charm. Don’t be afraid to cut it short when the charm thing doesn’t work. Facts, figures, in this simple example? Cold, hard cash. Works just fine, every time.


One of the largest challenges that looms in front of me is my choice in material. I pick from activities that I find refreshing, enjoyable, and entertaining, to me. That would be fishing, when the weather’s nice, or nice enough, and Shakespeare, in production, on screen, and in print. Part of that section of material is timeless, the strange way that Shakespeare’s works can be interpreted to have meaning in a post-modern world, and part of that harkens back to a basic lizard-brain function, where I’m trying to provide food to sustain me; although, truthfully, Black Bass tend to be more sporting and less about eating. Love the Redfish, but, for my tastes, I like them blackened. Blackened Cajun style — as may cayenne as possible. Not a lot of good flavor there, either. These are about choices. These are questions about choices. This is a week wherein we should ask ourselves whether we’re using the right material, as a Sagittarius, it’s what I’m asking, too.

The question, are we using the right material?

My simple answer? It’s what I know — I can make stuff up, but then, there’s a certain lack of authentic background. I use material that is close at hand, and close to my heart. As a Sagittarius, with all those planets in Virgo this week? Stick with what we know.


The trick is taking conscious steps towards a stated Capricorn goal. That simple. No? Yes, it’s really that easy. Take steps towards a stated goal. Because there’s a kind of reluctant energy with my Capricorn buddies, especially the guys I fish with? Because they tend to display a kind of hesitancy about taking actions this week? Need something, someone to prod you forward.

Think about it like this: I just spun new fishing line on my reels. It’s September, some bass are getting fat for the winter, such as it is. Days are marginally shorter. Not so much you’d notice, but, “Winter is coming!”

So the last line didn’t work, but it was a nice idea. My idea is to coerce you into a little bit of forward motion action, right now. This week. Steps towards a stated goal. Don’t have to be big steps, but I did just rewind my reels with new fishing line. Supposed to be easier to cast, won’t stretch as much as cheap mono, you know, we really should try this stuff out.


Every — each individual — Aquarius that I know? Each one has an independent, internal analyst. This can be a financial analyst, one who scrutinizes “The books,” looking for profit and loss. This can be a systems analyst, one who looks at processes and offers suggestions to streamline while reducing load on the processor. Or this can be a psycho-analyst. All depends on the individual Aquarius, and depends certain other factors in one’s chart. However, this is a week to employ one — or more — of those internal, innate Aquarius analysts.

First guess this is work-related, but I could be incorrect. So there’s a system analyst for that, if it is.

Second guesses this personal finance, so there’s the numbers guy for that, right?

Third guess, not really a long shot, just a guess, it could be an emotional upheaval of sorts. That requires the internal psycho-analyst.

Each part is played by a portion of the resident Aquarius soul. No outside help is required; although, in some situation, it wouldn’t hurt to ask for outside advice. Still, most this week’s questions? You know the answers if you analyze the situation with your Aquarius intellect.


Let your hair down. Seriously, take the hair out the pony tail holder and shake it free. Or the man bun. Whatever. There’s a mental constraint with my Pisces friends, and I was trying to think of a way to set your mind free. We were motoring along the inter-coastal waterway, headed towards a special fishing spot, and my hat got blown off. Wasn’t secure. Not the first hat I’ve lost like that. Doubt it’s the last one. We just kept on. However, after losing it to the breeze and the speeding boat? I realized, for that afternoon, I figured out two important facts. One, it’s okay to use sunscreen on top of my head. Might not be a big deal to some but with increasing forehead, burgeoning baldness, and receding hair, sure, it was new thing for me. Two, I was able to think better because I wasn’t burdened by anything on the top of my head. Which, as we talk about it, makes a kind of sense to me. Anyone who’s seen me in person in the last few weeks knows I tend to wear a bandana when I work. It’s so I can wear my hair down, but the bandana serves as a scarf, too, keeps the hair out of my face.

Set your mind free, Pisces. I’ve found that — what seems like a silly — but logical and symbolic step, like taking my hair our of a pony tail, that sets my mind free. You don’t have to lose a hat, like I did, to arrive at this conclusion.

Pisces: set your mind free, or, at least, let your hair down.


Stuck in my garage, there’s an old box of fishing gear. I pulled it out, thinking I had a certain kind of reel to use in the next few weeks. Trip that I’ve got coming up. Fishing trip, and I was thinking, I was going to try, have at least one rod and reel, fixed up with a certain kind of gear. Just a way to change the pace. Opening the box unleashed a whole series of memories. Just a box, think, it’s in a storage area, like stored in the garage, only, it’s got equipment I haven’t used in a half-dozen years. Tools of the trade, for fishing? Sure, that works. The attachment, though, the flood of memories, what it means, that’s the moment of poignancy for Aries. That flood of memories. There’s a lunar cycle that will trigger a flood of memories, like opening that box. Carefully stashed away, I found not one, but two reels. Perfect for what’s coming up for Aries. Don’t be afraid to dig around to find some old material that you’re planning on using. Digging around in those old boxes helps. It helps trigger memories, but then, too, it helps to build a foundation for the immediate future. Like a fishing trip in a few weeks. Up and coming. Soon.


This week, next seven, ten days? Think about carving out a niche for yourself. Think about a series of specialty skills that only you have. Think about that Taurus type of category that only you fit.

As an example, how many Shakespeare-quoting, Texas fishing, literate and yet unwashed astrology writers are there? Only one I know of. Did my time in Austin. I’ve floated a little further south, but that’s just a convenience move, really. Weird, but weirdly accurate at times, some folks swear by me, some folks swear at me, doesn’t much matter, I belong in a category of one: me.

As a Taurus, this is a time to refine, hone, and boil down all those qualities that make you who you are. A number of these skills, qualities, and commentary indicates that you really are a unique individual, as distinct as your own fingerprints. Now, as a an exercise to engage this week’s weirdness quotient? What category do you — along — belong in?

What’s your deal, man?


I got one client, gorgeous starlet. Well, not quite a star, yet, but she’s on her way, paying her dues, and working. Works a lot. Waitress, singer, songwriter, plays guitar, and records her own stuff, yes, on her way. Got a webpage someplace, and seen her stuff on the computer, in places. She calls, and I answer quickly, when I can. Part of that is because she’s a rising star, and part of that is because she’s fetching and attractive, and part of that, other than me, everyone else thinks she’s 22. She told me that all the stars were 22 until they were discovered.

What makes her different, she has a wiliness to drum. Drum up business, do her own promotions, get herself out there, and get herself noticed. Her gradual rise in fame? Her ascendency as a starlet? It’s not based upon being “discovered,” as that tends to be a mighty long wait.

As a Gemini, you can have your star on the ascendent — this very week. Takes effort, concentration, and focus. Hard work pays off. The challenge, and the one Gemini has that question, at this moment? All that hard work might not see an immediate result.

That rising starlet? She started getting traction, recently after playing at this one hole in the wall joint for close to a year. Gemini: forever young? Forever 22? Show up and do the hard work — won’t see immediate results, but you might find the work pays off quicker than it did for my little starlet friend.


When I teach astrology and the signs, I use an example of the crabs at the beach, as there tends to be a large number of these little sand crabs. Not much bigger than a quarter, they scurry from hole to hole, and try to avoid getting eaten by the gulls, be my guess. I’m unsure of the exact food chain at the beach, but that’s close enough. See a ton of those little crabs on the Texas beaches. The crabs also appear to move sideways. That’s a frequent commentary, from me, about the way the crabs seems move sideways. When I checked your charts, well, my charts for you, what I kept thinking was about moving sideways, a little to the left, or title to the right, whatever your orientation is.

There’s a distinct “weave” to this week’s Moon children energies. Duck, dodge, weave, a little to the left, or a little to the right, one of those. Just — looks like a dance to some. I don’t think it’s a dance, so much as not looking directly at the problem, the obstacle, the hinderance to Cancer’s forward progress. Off to one side, a little to the left, a little to the right, just not, like, straight on. No plunging forward, without checking, you know, conditions, to the left or the right, or over, or under, or whatever.

Hurricanes have a way of eroding what was once solid ground.

The Leo:

I spent too much time at the beach, or, really, the gulf coast. Yeah, that’s my excuse. Barefoot, in shorts, sometimes, nothing else. Fishing pole in hand, maybe, sure, that works. When I’m home, though, I swiped one of those signs, best guess it was an Jimmy Buffet line, “No shoes, no shirt, no problem.” As a, no, wait, as The Leo, normal rules don’t apply at this moment in time and space. You’re floating, free. You’re not bound by normal restrictions. For me, number of place I’ve been, the “Shoes, shirts required” signs are most common.

This is a week, for you, for me, too, this is a week for “Shoes, shirts, pants, not required.”

Yes, I know, for some of us, those are suggested. Up to your Leo self, but you know my feelings, right?

“No shoes, no shirt, no pants, no problem.”

At least, for this week, for The Leo.

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Kramer Wetzel


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