Horoscopes 2.22.2018

    He words me, girls, he words me, that I should not
    Be noble to myself.

Cleopatra in Shakespeare’s Antony & Cleopatra V.ii.192-3

Horoscopes starting 2.22.2018



The Fishes

Shakespeare Scholarship and my astrology have much in common. There’s a seemingly scientific way to analyze any Shakespeare text and arrive at the desired conclusion. In part, the material is over 400 years distant and there’s no author blog, so we can’t know what he was thinking. Then, too, in most — academic — scholarship, there’s scant extant material. A couple of copies of the plays, and some early performance schedules. About all there is.

Happy Pisces birthday!

This week, the following weeks? This is about what you’re looking for and finding it. Like my example of much of the current crop of Shakespeare scholarship, Pisces will find what Pisces is looking for.

Hint: Look for the good in people. (I know it’s there; I’ve seen it before.)



Aries The Ram

Old school buddy posted a picture of me, hunched over a keyboard, a maniacal look to my eyes. That was some years ago, but I was just beginning to explore the vast world of personal computers as a method for data storage and retrieval. While I was certainly no hacker, I did enjoy messing around with the internal programming and possible customizations. I wanted to make it “mine.”

I was working with my most current gadget, a tablet that had tens of thousands — or more — power than that old computer in the picture. Not much customization is required, not for me. I like “out of the box, ready to go” hardware and software, now. Still, with on the fly word/grammar checks, and built-in everything, accessible across the cloud, and so forth? Less about doing any kind of custom “hacking” on the system, and more about just settling in to work.

Aries: With the current crop of phones, tablets, and even some watches? Or a laptop? Just start working. That image of me, as much younger person, that was then. As an Aries, the time is now, let’s spend a little less time “Adjusting the controls,” and a little more time just working.



The Bull

Paraphrasing a line from the movie, “Duck Soup?” The character played by Groucho Marx says, “This is so simple a kid could figure it out,” and then, sotto voce, “quick, go find a kid, I can’t understand this!” The 1933 film was satire and warning about the rise of fascist politics in Europe, with messages applicable for the current day. But that wasn’t the point, no, the idea that “This is so simple a kid could figure it out,” and then, “quick, find me a kid to explain this,” that echoes through to our era, as well.

Watch some people hand a phone to a teenager, “Can you figure this out?”

As the planets unfold and chart paths along their proscribed routes, as they wheel in their orbits, Taurus runs into obstacles. Not big obstacles, just little issues. The trick to utilize this week’s energy? Two-fold message here, one, be willing to ask for help, and two, be willing to ask someone who obviously knows more, like some kid.

“This is so simple a kid could figure it out,” and then, sotto voce, “quick, go find a kid, I can’t understand this!”

Thank the Marx Brothers.



The Twins

Unsolicited business advice isn’t always welcome. I’ll see these offers, from time to time, with an solicitation to place an article on one of my sites, for a nominal fee, and goal is to get some links from my site’s content, or something looks like my site’s content, to some target.

Targeted Traffic?

I can’t do it. All of my site is original, administered by me. Written by me. Shot, tagged, uploaded, massaged, and mangled. Faults? All my own. Problems? All my own doing. So it’s amusing, at times, and just plain rude at other times. On a good day, I am amused by such missives. Essentially targeted junk mail for website operators, but something I’m clearly not interested in.


The Gemini message, is how we react to such crap when it makes it through the layers and filters. With Mars in Sagittarius at the moment? Opposite from your good, Gemini self?

“Oh this really pisses me off!”

Bit strong for a reaction. However, I do understand. It’s mostly Mars, and understanding that energy? Write tasty, toasty response that suggest the marketing firm research your site a little, to see where it would fit.

Engage, but do so politely.


The Crab - the Moonchild

The Crab

“Feelings are real.” Yes, yes they are. “But feelings aren’t real.” No, you’re right, they aren’t real. And the debate rages onward. Real, not real, what will it be? There’s a sense that there is a — looks like a big dump truck — big rig backing up to unload a huge amount of emotional material.


Real? Not real?

In either case, the sense of the feelings is valid, as the debate about ‘real’ and ‘not real’ continues.

All the material in Pisces pushes the Cancer (Moon Child) emotional buttons. The approach of the full moon hammers this home. The sensation of the feelings is real, that’s for sure.

The caution is about making an emotional decision when cooler, more rational heads would see better and therefore? Let the rational side assess the situation. Material — especially Moon Child material — that is covered with emotional attachments? Yeah, not always the best decisions.

The Leo

The Leo

The Leo

With a tip of the hat to the great Texan novelist, Kinky Friedman (Scorpio), The Leo is probably feeling much the same way I am.

“Too young for medicare and too old for women to care.”

It’s a humorous statement, and one that plays on almost metered out, but not quite. Not that it matters, this isn’t about poetry, and for that matter, it’s not really about what people want. It’s a funny place to be, although the planets are going to leave more than one Leo feeling a bit old. Or too old for this crap, but then, not old enough to qualify for whatever.

Stuck, in the middle, it’s what you make of what is there. I like some of the action from Mars, and Saturn, as they pave the way as well as infuse The Leo with a certain amount of determination.

Get ready then get it done. A little less talk, and a little more (Leo) action goes a long way to solve the current existential crisis.



The Virgin

Very occasionally, I’ll pause in the middle of a client conversation to make a note. A dear Virgo came up with this one —

Virgo: Everyone likes office supplies!

I am less sure about that statement, the more I look at it in print. I tend to like one type of office supply these days, and that’s me. All right, two items: Post-It notes and Sharpies.

I have horrible handwriting. It started to deteriorate at the university when I started to use computers, and my miserable lettering never got better. So the Sharpies see limited use for labeling, or marking something, or an attempt at art of various forms. Or scratching a note on the Post-Its.

Between two, no, three elements, have to check my notes, there’s all that stuff piled up in Pisces, then Mars in Sagittarius, and finally, the approaching full moon in Virgo? I don’t want your Virgo self to forget something important. The planets, no, wait, the energies represented by the planets, no, wait, let me check my notes, stuck to the screen here…

See how that works?

Virgo: Everyone likes office supplies!



The Scales

Careful with the sentimental attachments. I do have a few items I’m marginally attached to, myself, so I can say I understand. A coffee mug from a long-lost lover. A few photographs of a much younger me, on and around motorcycles, stuff like that. A souvenir bandana from a Willie Nelson concert.

Odd attachments.

There are odd attachments that come up in the Life of Libra at times like this. Or a unique time like this, because we may never be at this point in time, ever again.

There are two energies, one saying to shuck the old, odd attachments. The other force is tugging at the Libra Heart of Hearts, suggesting that you hold onto all of this old, sentimental material.

The temptation is to use a clear-cut, scorched-earth Libra policy to deal with the sentimental attachments, while, my very Sagittarius suggestion is to hold off on dumping everything, just yet.

Just a suggestion but that might also explain why so many of my Libra friends have off-site storage lockers.

“Don’t want to throw it away, and don’t want to keep it at home.”

Might be a good time not to get rid of it.

Libra reply: “But we could use the space.”




A beautiful aspect of modern life is the amount of “golden age” material now available. I found scans and whole editions of old “pulp” magazine available. I had an affection, even to this day for some of that material, dated that it might be. Ray-guns and Rocket-ships.

Some of the material written then was quite good and stands the test of time. Not all of it, as it was a popular medium, and the nature of its transmittal, pulp paper, was notorious for disintegrating over time. A highly fluid medium, and not unlike the current state of the “web,” which can see brilliant stars blink on and then blink out, here and gone in a matter of moments.

The “golden age” material in this example was pulp fiction, and my exposure is largely limited to what was then Science Fiction. Some good, some bad, some with overt sexism — but it wasn’t sexist at its time.

That went sideways in hurry.

The golden age material is beautiful in its proper, historical frame. Without that framework, the material is less glorious.

As a good Scorpio, this week’s Scorpio adventures need the proper framework to explain why what is happening, and how that affected us then so you can understand why we are doing this now.

Scorpio: Frame the correct answer. Without context? It doesn’t work.




Many terms have been used to describe my style. I prefer terms like “Casual, irreverent, and personable.”

“Asinine, rude, and impetuous, that’s Kramer.”

That last one cycled through and kind of hurt.

Ouch, that hurt. Wasn’t the exact wording, but cleaned up a little, it was close enough. The sentiment carried, even if there were few more words that might’ve been less kind.

With Mars, in Sagittarius, our little Sagittarius feelings are borne too close to the surface. We can get all “butt-hurt” over seeming innocuous comments. Or we can solider onward.

With Mars, we are, in fact, abrupt and direct, perhaps impetuous, and to a non-Sagittarius person that might appear rude and asinine. Given where the planets are? As a good Sagittarius? Remember that Mars does this, and we can adjust our output accordingly — not everyone likes, or understands, our blunt, rapid-fire delivery.



The Sea Goat

Saturn — currently in residence in Capricorn — has this unique ability, while in the Tropical Zodiac Sign of Capricorn, to harness and direct vision. Saturn gives you a laser-like focus, all those wide, broad bands of light-energy, concentrated into a single point, energy that is stuffed together. Gives a brilliant ability to drive your Capricorn attention to a single point.

The image of a laser with its red-dot, pinpoint precision is what I was thinking about. At least one hunting buddy, not named Bubba, will talk about laser sites on some firearm. Yeah, that’s not what I was thinking about, but if that’s a useful analogy, then, sure. Whatever works.

With Saturn’s laser-like focus, bring that attention, concentrate all the copious Capricorn interests and mental horsepower, get that shooting in one direction. Firing at a single point. Single target, like that concentrated light energy, all in one place. Can work wonders, this next few days. Focus.

Capricorn: Bring all your attention to bear on a single point.



The Water Bearer

Some time back I enquired of a favorite author, what was the best place to acquire his novels, like Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Costco, or Apple’s iBooks? As a best-selling author, I was wondering what was the best place, for him, as an author, for me to make a purchase. Aware of my position as Z-List blogger, and backlisted writer, he was not sure what was the best choice. “Any of them work fine,” was his reply. Doesn’t much matter, is what I thought at first. The longer I thought, though, there’s a weird connection, as I’ve priced hardback, first editions all over the place, the list is obvious, and, at any given moment, with fluid pricing, the best place to buy could be any one of those places.

As an author, though, he sells in all those places, and a popular author, he can’t (read: shouldn’t) play favorites. Which one is best?

For me, the cheapest outlet is best. For different authors, it varies, could be any one of those listed, as there is a merry price war between all of the outlets, as to which one is cheapest — on a given day — perhaps, moment by moment.

We all have favorites, but in the modern form of commerce, there’s a “cheapest versus most convenient” pick to make. Then, too, as the NYT Best Seller pointed out, doesn’t much matter, as long as we buy.

So, let’s extend this conversation and metaphor, Aquarius, doesn’t much matter where you take action as long as you take some action.

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About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person.