Analogy and Metaphor
Know I’ve used this before, but apparently, in this day and age, it bears repeating.
Got a buddy, he’s part-time handyman. Can fix anything. I was thinking about him because I’ve a repair, just a piece that needs to be replaced, while I can do it myself? I have the necessary tools, mostly a screwdriver, and a step-stool, while I could do it myself? I let my buddy do it because I want to stay in his good graces.
He’s a Virgo, you know.
He has a mutable scale that he charges for his services, when he bids a job.
The first price, because it’s me, I tend to get a cheaper price as long as I don’t talk too much. He was working here, one time, and he was amazed at how often I would step from the home office into the kitchen to get a fresh cup of coffee.
“Management,” and toast with my coffee.
He’d shake his head and go back to work. I took two client calls that morning.
We do stop, when he’s ready, “Concrete’s got to set,” and shoot the breeze, and we have a number of shared interests. I’ve learned a thing or two from him, and one is not to interrupt unless bidden to do so.
That’s the first price, no question asked, draw for materials, and paid in full upon completion, as agreed in simple invoice/contract. One, low price.
The second price is someone who gets an idea, buys some paint, maybe some lumber, asks questions at the hardware store, all patiently being explained that “Anyone can do this,” when, in fact, “anyone” refers to a highly skilled individual with a specific understanding of time, tools, and techniques.
On paper, in a theoretical world, sure, “Anyone can do this,” but practically?
There’s usually a price bump, upwards for those who meddle then call.
The third price amuses me the most. It goes like this:
“I watched a YouTube video on how to do this and I tried it myself, and now the power to the whole house is out, and I can’t figure out what I did wrong.”
It’s that third one that amuses me the most.
It’s also a reminder.
Me? There are some things in life I spend the time, and do research so I can fix it myself. Then there are tasks that I know it’s not worth my effort to even attempt the fix myself.
Call the guy — it’s that simple.
Or see me?
Analogy and Metaphor
In the back seat of the car I’m currently driving, I have an old milk crate — funny story there in itself — and in that milk crate? There’s a spare tablecloth for work, a zip-up pouch with sunglasses, sun screen, bottle opener, and a couple of number 2 offset worm hooks. That crate has a spare set of reading glasses, another pair of cheap sunglasses, a book, a pair of flip flops, and I’m not sure what else, a space blanket? I also carry a small air pump, in case of flat tire. Or low tire.
There’s usually a few bottles of water, a leftover blanket with astrology symbols, wires and cables to plug in various electronics. Just the usual crap.
Most important? A triple A card. Something happens? I’m calling for help. There are two motors I was totally comfortable with, one is the old, inline Ford six, especially in the older truck bodies since there was enough room to crawl around in the engine bay to work on that motor. That, and it was damn-near bullet-proof. The other is more of a range of motorcycle motors, usually twins. Again, the follies of misspent youth.
I can lift the hood of the car, I can look at the motor. Unless it something obvious, like a hose with slit, and steam escaping? I’m at a loss. I know this.
Analogy and Metaphor
A couple of cars back, I drove a Hybrid Honda Civic. The hybrid battery was fried and useless by 120K miles, but looking at it, online, I found I could buy a replacement battery much cheaper than what the dealerships would suggest. Arrived via truck freight. Cost at least a third less than the dealer, and that included shipping.
Replaced it, at the dealership for a cheap price, service manager acted like my best friend, and was surprised that I had a battery in the trunk, got it all replaced, much less, and over time, that paid off. Remember when gas was $5?
That car had over 200K miles when it was sold out from underneath me.
Replacement battery still worked; averaged 40+ MPG, usually to and from Austin.
There was, online, a video showing how easy it was to replace that battery, the big hybrid battery. Pull out the back seat, undo four bolts holding the thing in the place, and then… and then I was lost.
I took it to the dealer. Like I said, service guy pretended we were best friends, and he did me a huge favor, and it was less expensive. And good. And safe. Like I said, another 80K miles on the replacement before it left my hands.
A couple of hours of poking around online, and I saved over a grand in cash, first with purchase of a battery and second, having the battery ready, and showing up just as my stars aligned, so the service manager arranged it on the down low.
Analogy and Metaphor
I’m just reminded of my buddy’s price, usually more than double, “I watched a YouTube video, and tried to fix it myself.”
I’ve been looking at astrology charts for more than 30 years.
Analogy: A comparison of two things, alike in certain aspects… by which something unfamiliar is explained by comparing it to something more familiar. (Page 20)
Metaphor: An analogy identifying one object with another, and ascribing to the first object one or more qualities of the second. (Page 287)
Both definition lifted from A Handbook to Literature (Holman & Harmon. NY: Macmillan. 1992, 6th Ed.) — hot link (some restriction apply, see fineprint for details.)
