Week of: November 25- December 1

Week of: November 25- December 1

Wish Kramer a happy solar return. You can fax him your best birthday wishes at 512/448-0970.

Aries [3/23-4/20]: That inexorable hand of fate keeps marching a little bit closer. You can feel it in the air, that cold and crisp autumn air, the leaves changing color, the days dwindling, the inevitable onslaught of cold and dark. Actually, you seem to have a much better outlook than most. You will find yourself humming strange songs at work, listening attentively, and, in general, being more helpful. This is a good sign because there is good stuff ahead for you. I’ve warned you before about getting too stuck in the wagon rut of life, especially right now when you need to be ready to jump up onto the Interstate.

Taurus [4/21-5/22]: I know you hate it when I suggest we turn your Taurus attention towards the old office place. The deal is this, my fine friend with great taste, you will find that you need to expend a certain amount of energy in getting affairs at work (remember, that’s where your money comes from) in order. Now, that’s an old cliche, but the idea is sound: try tacking up some new artwork at your office. I strong;y recommend something tasteful and demure down on black velvet which would mean this is a good time to shop at a garage sale or the flea market. Some new art work at work: you’ll enjoy the change. “Dogs Playing Poker” is always a welcome relief. Or a life size picture of the King.

Gemini [5/23-6/21]: Gemini, dear Gemini, please be so kind as to work on being a little more diplomatic when dealing with your family this week. You have strong feelings and desires, it’s just that you ideas are running afoul of every one else this week. Try to be a little less pointed and a little less strident when you are talking to people. You don’t need to hurt them that much, especially not with a pointed wit — in certain sport fishing circles, it’s considered good form to take the barb off the hook. You might try that this week, too.

Cancer [6/22-7/22]: It looks like it is cult week for Cancers. I would be wary of anyone who promises that they have a cure for all your spiritual needs, unless of course, that person is a really good astrologer who would never ever steer you astray. You are very much on little bit of a trip right now, and the only nlky caution that seems appropriate is to make sure you don’t a have a trophy buckle bigger than your head.

Leo [7/23-8/23]: Look at it this way, dear Mighty Leo: all the other stuff is kicking around in Fire Signs which means that your own passion is further heightened. What this means is that you are alive with a burning sensation, and I don;t think the local drugstore has an immediate cure. Actually, the problems are less with digestion and more with this passion thing, that feeling of greatness which all Leo’s are born with. I would expect Destiny and Fate to be serving you up some good Thanksgiving Day dinners. No Turkey TV Dinners for you this week.

Virgo [8/24-9/23]: Will power seems to be a good source of trouble this week. In other words, your will power and the other person’s drive gets confused. I would take a moment, if I were in your boots, to consider what direction you are running off in. In fact, I would make a serious consideration about what that other person might be feeling in light of what you are doing to him or her. Then again, on the other side of the overused coin cliche, you do have a wonderful sense of energy this week. Ever water ski barefoot? You might want to try that this week, behind the old bass boat.

Libra [9/24-10/23]: You are feeling a little sneaky this week, and if you are a good Libra (there is no such thing as a bad one, really), then you have some plans for the coming holidays which you haven’t hatched yet. Get all those little duck in a row, to overuse yet another cliche expression because you are in fine shape this week. I would also suggest that this would be a good week for refinancing the bass boat. Yes sir, this is a good time for getting those pesky little details in order, like working out a second mortgage so you can have your dream boat.

Scorpio [10/24-11/23]: Scorpio, you are scaring me right now. You have this gleeful look on your face, and you see nothing but hope for the foreseeable future. In other words, all that happy stuff I suggested about year ago is finally starting to happen. It really did start a year ago, but your “wait and see” attitude has finally paid off. So are some deals that you have been hammering out this week. You will really, really enjoy Thanksgiving day.

Sagittarius [11/24-12/21]: You have probably been hearing a persistent and annoying ringing in your ears. This shouldn’t be too much trouble, although you you might want to claim that’ this phenomenon is like the “Taos Hum.” It isn’t. There is just a lot of romance running through you personal sky right now, and there are a lot of birthdays going on. And that ringing in your head, as much as you would like to think that it’s the result of getting thrown from a horse (and landing on your head) it probably has a more mundane location and cause.

Capricorn [12/22-1/20]: You are not going to let the stress of being around the whole damn family interfere with your happiness this week. Listen to the strange music inside your head: the body may be present but the mind is obviously gone on a little vacation. Of course, there are a few Cappy’s who are going to be on an actual vacation right now, and those few, those lucky few, shouldn’t be having any trouble whatsoever. It’s the poor numbers who have to share time with their families that are going to experience some trauma. It’s nothing new: you are used to it by now, I mean, it is your family. How many Elvis impersonators are going to be at the dinner table Thursday?

Aquarius [1/21-2/18]: I realize that you feel pretty invincible now. There is no goal too lofty for you to attain. There is no mountain to high for you to climb. Impossible odds make you scoff in derision. This is all fine and dandy, but just remember this old Texas saying: ain’t no tree too big for a little dog to lift his leg…. I would be careful of little dogs coming around and “lowering” your expectations and goals for you.

Pisces [2/19-3/22]: Okay, dear Pisces friend, work with me on this: taxes. No, this isn’t a pun about the largest unfrozen state in the U.S., this is a hint about things to come…. while everyone else is enjoying a nice little nap in front of the TV, you should be getting all your paperwork ready for your accountant. If you don’t have a good accountant, let me know, I can always recommend one to you. And why the rush for the end of the year season? Trust me — you’re going to be very busy soon.

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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