Week of: February 17-23

What! we have seen the seven stars.

Pistol in Shakespeare’s King Henry the IV, part the Second (act II, scene iv)

Them old seven stars, ever wonder which seven it was?

Aries : Look, in the old days, when magic filed the air, Saturn was considered a BAD planet. Not like, “bad” bad, I mean, it was considered a generally evil influence. Here at FGS world Headquarters, though,we have been able to scientifically determine that there are benign influences emanating from Saturn. Especially this week because Saturn makes a really nice little Astrological angle to Jupiter, the Lucky Star. That means you could win the lottery this week. I found that doubtful, but if you do, I’m only asking for 1% because I’m not greedy.

Taurus : That prime little wedding indicator is all over you right now. That’s the good news. The problem is that this is a time when you will feel yourself strongly attracted to some one who is probably not too good for you. Problem, eh? You will find that this is the time when you will be tempted to throw all caution to the wind, and run off to Vegas to get hitched to some down its luck person who you have fallen hopelessly in love with. Aren’t you tired of this “just needs a little work” type of people?

Gemini : If things get much weirder for Gemini this month, I don’t know what I’m going to do. Feel like just about ever loose nut and bolt has shaken loose, and all of this debris is falling down on your head? If you weren’t such an adaptable sign, then this would be a problem, but you can adapt to just about anything. Which you will this week. Remember that change is a good thing for you. Shake it up some.

Cancer : What a marvelous week you’re going to have. If you didn’t win a fishing contest last week, then you are bound to win SOMETHING this week. Long overdue, too. I hope you are feeling much better about things these days. Speaking of winning a prize or a contest, did you get the results back from the doctor? I sure hope that wasn’t what you were going to win….

Leo : My dear Leo friend. My dear sweet, wonderful, noble and ever great Leo friend. My ever faithful, always the very best at everything dear Leo friend. What’s with me trying to be so nice? There’s a little bit of an ego problem this week. Not that you aren’t the absolute greatest at whatever endeavors you take a whack at, it’s just that this is one week where it really is best to sort of rest on your laurels for a bit.

Virgo : The good news is that there is no bad stuff happening in Virgo this week. The only mess you will have to attend to is a an emotional one, and it really isn’t going to be that big of a deal. I would watch out for the “tall, dark, handsome stranger” routine, though, because there is certainly one of those kind of people lurking on your horizons. The only conundrum I face now, is whether to say “avoid the strange one” or “go for it.” I mean, if I tell you to avoid the strange ones, then I might never get another date with a Virgo again.

Libra : I was just talking to one of my martial arts buddies, and he said since he got his black belt, he’s never been in a fight. With Mars doing a dance on your head, and with Saturn making it that much worse, I would avoid fights, or scenarios which lead to fights. Watch the confrontations. Period. Of course, my black belted friend also said he now knows how to handle situations when they arise. I would strongly urge your Libra diplomacy to the front this week.

Scorpio : Out with the old and in with the new is a great idea. In fact, in your case, my dear Scorpio friend, it’s a great idea this week. You might imitate the actions of a Virgo this week and do a little housecleaning, either for real or in more metaphorical sense. That means look around and see what can be straightened up, maybe toss a lot of old files from the hard disk, clean out the web browser’s cache, that sort of thing.

Sagittarius : Oh my dear Sag! Oh my dear! Oh my! Oh! It’s a reductive sort of an analogy but it seems to work. And work is the big issue here. Changing jobs? Changing income? worried about the boss? Don’t fret. While that’s easy for a self-employed astrologer to say,. you might have some income-related panic this week. The good news is that there is a whole fistful of dollars headed your way, just be a little more than careful about what you say, and to whom you say it.

Capricorn :
The week meekly rolls in, like a new kitten without its eyes open. But, like the miracle of life itself, the little kitten of the week gets its eyes opened, right before the weekend. I would sit back and enjoy the ride this week, and learn to take some of the unusual activity at work in stride. While I’ve said it before, and it’s a terribly cliched expression, look before you leap this week. Remember, the eyes don’t open until right before the weekend.

Aquarius : I don’t know that there is a lot I can tell you about this week, I mean you’ve got SO many planets yanking your chain, and pushing and pulling, you are just full of energy. Just about everything is going good. Well, except for rather major changes in influences which will effect your earned income…. and I wouldn’t worry too much about the influences, either. But then, I’m not an Aquarius.

Pisces : Looks like you have a day of reckoning coming. Or, I could try to make a joke about it, and say something like reckon you got some reckoning coming your way. In any case. I would suggest that work on the boat this week. Looks like the old weekend escape vehicle needs some attention.

About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in a trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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