Horoscopes for 8.23.2018

A solemn air and the best comforter
To an unsettled fancy, cure thy brains
(Now useless) boiled within thy skull.

Prospero in Shakespeare’s The Tempest (V.i.58-60)

    “Boiled” is most likely an alchemical term that refers to the last step before turning base metal into gold.

The Sun moves into the tropical zodiac sign of Virgo August 22, 2018, 11:00 PM, your mileage may vary. Mars starts to unwind from his retrograde pattern on August 27, too.

As Virgo starts, what does that mean?

Horoscopes for 8.23.2108



The Virgin

While, technically, the dog days of summer are supposedly over? It’s still that sultry, sweet-hot heat around here. Good time to fish as there seems to be, I think this purely emotional, but there seems to be less heat at the beach, or even just on a boat — in the lake. Something about that kind of action seems to make it all OK. The dog days are supposedly over, but in reality, I was raised in Texas, yeah, we don’t see marginally cooler weather for another month or two. Later in the week, maybe the tail-end of the weekend and on into next week? There’s a little window to “Make things happen” for Virgo. By “make things happen,” that implies actionable items on the part of Virgo, with my promise that actionable items that are acted upon by Virgo will see results in less than ten days. From a purely piscatory point, mythology and lore suggest that fishing is best when both the sun and the moon are in the sky. That’s this next week. Tail-end of the weekend, and on into next week. Take advantage of the setting, in my case, go fishing, and in the case of any other Virgo? Go “fishing,” if not fishing itself, whatever presents itself as an actionable item. Action now, results sooner than you can think, “Wow, fish on!”


Venus is the planet of love. Venus is the planet of peace and harmony. In old-fashioned astrology, Venus is denoted as the “ruler” of Libra, as in the patriarchal head of the Libra organization. I tend to stray from the term “ruler” as it has that male-dominated kind of sense to it, and I prefer just saying Venus is the main planet for Libra. Simpler, no? Less baggage, too. Which is what this is about. Less baggage.

Whether this is the frankly outdated and heavily patriarchal, male-centric version of astrology, or if this is another kind of emotional, physical, mental, or other baggage? Doesn’t much matter. This is a time to consider a way to let go of some of that. So look around, and think about what it looks like, your Libra self surrounded by all the physical, emotional, mental baggage, all of that stacked up around you. Think about how it looks, and how some of this is comforting, but some it, not so much. Venus, in her infinite wisdom, as the planets move forward, Venus provides a chance to make a break with some of the baggage, real, or imagined. Just as a suggestion? You would look so much better with maybe just a little bit less of that crap you carry around.


You know, my most excellent Scorpio friend, you did this to yourself. There is always an element of disbelief, but seriously, now, you know, you brought this upon yourself. Are you happy with the outcome? If you are, then we can stop, and I’ll berate you no further. But if you are not comfortable with the outcome of the current situation, what is the first way to correct the situation? What is the first step in a more correct direction? As a good Scorpio, what is the best way to proceed forward, after our little detour? Admit where the real problem is. Admit, at this point, what your Scorpio part was in the outcome.

I’m continuously amused by the expression, “But what choice did I have?” A gentle shrug of the shoulders. I understand, and if it were me, faced with the same decisions, I can’t honestly say I would choose any different myself — although I’m not Scorpio. So I do understand. I would probably make the same decision had I been faced with this the exact same set of circumstances. The difference? I would loudly proclaim it was my mistakes, and I was proud of my error. As a good Scorpio, have you been trying to cover it up, or pin it on someone else? Truth. Truth always comes out. Someone will find out, and no amount of denial, blame, or shame will change it. Scorpio: admit it. You did this to yourself. Fastest way out? follow my lead, admit that it was a mistake. “Did you enjoy it?” Well, yeah, there is that. It was fun at the time.


It was merely burgers on the grill, which, was really a good-quality BBQ pit. Little fire-box, off to one side, filled with, I’m guessing, split hickory, short logs, not quite a foot long, and fed in, just enough to keep the coals going The heat was low and slow. My fishing buddy was kind of toasted, too. Good meat, though, and the BBQ was done properly, low and slow. The tender burgers were infused with the hickory flavor. The other secret, he also had some chicken on the grill, the other secret? He had some store-bought BBQ sauce, and he was basting the chicken with a mix, half off-brand BBQ sauce, and half a stick of melted butter.

Low and slow, that’s what works. That, and some butter. Low and slow is what works. I asked his secret for timing, as the chicken was meaty, devious, yet juicy and tender, as were the burgers. He looked over with slightly rheumy eyes, perhaps beer goggles, and he suggested the secret was timing, “Takes, I’d say, about three good beers. Maybe two and half, but you have to savor the beer,” and he held up a bottle of imported beer, “yeah have to savor the beer.” He drained the bottle, looked at the grill, and smiled. As a Sagittarius myself, I’m reminded of the secret to that good BBQ. Supposedly, he was just grilling, but what he was really doing? Grilling, pit BBQ style. Whatever works. The secret for Sagittarius? Like the grill, or BBQ, or whatever one wants to call it? Low and slow. Takes time. Patience, time, allow for a little extra time for the meat to cook properly. Whatever Sagittarius deed needs done? Low and slow. Low heat, long time, much better outcome.


Stop. Right now, stop. Stop poking, stop pushing, and stop prodding. Some days, it makes more sense than others, but at this moment? Stop fiddling with it. That is a lot of “stops” I’m employing, but there is a reason for this, the idea, the concept is simple. It does not require your Capricorn assistance to get better, or worse, or healed, or whatever it is that it is supposed to do. The very best Capricorn action at this moment? Stop. Applying pressure of any kind? I know your heart is in the right place, and I know you are doing this to help, and I understand that you get the idea that is for their own good, but stop. Please stop, just for now. The curious example of inaction being the best course of action? Think about the great passive peace activist, Gandhi, MLK, and the Buddha. Passive resistance as opposed to violent action. The violence gets your Capricorn self nowhere in hurry. The action? The best course of action is inaction. So, as we wheel though this week, consider the quickest way out of trouble is to stop poking, stop prodding, stop playing with it. Stop pushing and see if there aren’t more immediate responses where someone else will pick up the charge. That works, right? To make that happen? Stop. Stop right now.


Go as a “Plus One.” I had this one girlfriend, accompanied me on several work trips, and she would sit there, patiently, reading a book or whatever, while I worked. Which meant, later, I had to be a “Plus One,” for her. Worked out well, as I got invited to some events I wouldn’t have been able to attend, otherwise. Like girlfriends like that one. That’s also how I got interested in opera, classical music, a certain brand of country music, and that “Plus One” even got me front row tickets at rock concert. So the idea for this week’s Aquarius energies? Think about that moniker, “Plus One.” At one event, recently, I was a “Plus One,” no name, just the extra sidekick, some woman’s arm candy. I don’t mind, too much. Keep my mouth shut, use the correct silverware, and don’t slurp. Dab the corners of my mouth with the linen serviette. Anyone who really knows me understands that I have a costume guideline, and it is still August, in Texas, and it is still blistering hot so I tend to dress aggressively casual. For an event like that, I can take it up a notch, to what some would call, locally, “Business casual.” Free food, entertainment, most important, personal interplay between characters who all think they have high rank? Makes it worth my time, and even getting dressed. The whole secret to do this right? Go as a “Plus One” when the offer comes up in the next few days.


I’m not much of a believer in “magic.” These days, I’m not much of believer in the goodness of mankind, either. Perhaps I’m a little bitter. Maybe overly cynical? After a long summer, and it’s not even close to being over, not for me, but after a long summer, I’m unsure about the whole “Truth triumphing over injustice.” Doesn’t stop me from looking for minor rays of hope in the summer sun, and now that Virgo is underway, what that means for Pisces? Working with others. While I’m cynical, bitter, and depressed? There is magic in the Pisces air. There is magic that you can see, feel, and manipulate — to your Pisces advantage. It’s a matter of seeing through the cynical, bitter, and depressed individuals like myself, seeing past all of that crap. Move yourself forward on the wings and shoulders of friends, enemies, cohorts, and compatibles signs. What’s most compatible, this week? Sort of depends on your individual chart, but I would favor water signs. You know, Cancer, Scorpio, and lovely Pisces? The Pisces power to manifest good stuff is highlighted. This week. Now, even. Wish you’d see a big lotto win for me, but if you can’t, I’ll live. Bitter, but alive. However, don’t let my bitterness — or anybody else — infect that Pisces hope for the future, the good wishes, and positive vibration you can send out. What you send out this next few days? Comes back in triplicate, next week, week after.


For Aries, this is about hooks. Self-referential hooks. Like the way the end of a song comes back to echo that refrain at the beginning of the song. Novel I was reading, the original opening sequence was referred to — in allegorical form — twice, deeper into the novel. Halfway through the book, a character referred back to the original premise, or the opening gambit, played part the beginning. Then, just as the scene was coming to a close, at the end, that lick was referred to again. Clever bit of writing, guess the author was working from an outline with reminders on when and where to add to reminders, the hooks. Seemed to be built right in, occurred naturally, and the purpose is repetition.

Those hooks are about repeating an idea, in slightly different format, like change the words, or, in this case, it was lyrics from a song. Different verses were used, so the refrain wasn’t quite the same. Still, as a literary device, the way the material hooked back, helped set a tone. Carried a message further along, all the while adding some emotional shading. Now, this applies to Aries this week, as there’s a need to repeat the message, over and over. However, and like that book, don’t rely on the exact same wording to repeat the Aries message. Change it. Use a middle verse then the famous last lines. Repeat the opening lines. Change it up. Change the words around while repeating that refrain, the Aries refrain. Might take three or four tries to get the message across, I know, you’d like if they would just listen the first time, but I’m suggesting that’s not likely. Therefore? Repeat the refrain, different verse, as need be. Hooks.


Mercury un-retrograde and food. Local coffee shop chain, think, like a local version of Denny’s, only with better food? The local version offered a pulled pork BBQ biscuit hollandaise over poached eggs thing. Sort of classic confusion food. Not exactly fusion but remarkably good. The pulled pork BBQ was nuanced and coy in its flavor, with the slightly tangy citrus of the hollandaise setting it off within its wonderful mash-up. Eggs done perfectly, and that place? Biscuits done correctly, too. A little on the weird side, but as a fan of certain kinds of fusion food, and in place where I least expected it, the meal was delicious. A breakfast item, to be sure, and one that I doubt I would find in more tony climes, but as a local undertaking, it was great. Fusion food in the places where we least expect it. It was — allegedly — hickory smoked pork butt, with a generous portion on half a biscuit, a poached egg on top, and that was covered in real (seemed fresh enough) hollandaise sauce. Taurus, dear, or “dear heart Taurus,” be willing to experiment along lines that can be easily extrapolated as good. That same chain of restaurant and coffee shops? I would never go there for Five Star dining experiences. Flip that around, though, and when it comes to cooking breakfast — absolutely perfectly every time? It’s a winner. Stick with what extrapolates out as good. It’s “safe” with a side-dish of adventuresome, without being too adventuresome.


I’ve heard, and read, this in a number of places. In Italy, the home of espresso, coffee is served with milk only in the morning. If milk is added, or ordered, in the afternoon, it is considered an affront to the coffee, and a personal insult. To be honest, though, I’ve also heard that milk is only served with coffee in the afternoon. I suspect, someplace along the way, there’s an Italian Coffee Purist having fun with this myth. “Milk in the morning — in coffee! That’s ridiculous!” Add an Italian sneer. “Milk in the afternoon in coffee? That’s absurd!” Add a proper Italian sneer. I don’t know which way is correct, in Italy. I do know that I prefer my coffee black and strong in the morning, and in the afternoon, a single, double-shot of espresso seems to work well for me. Enough to power through the day, but not so much I’m up half the night worrying about things, with things being how they are. Gemini can spend hours trying to find out if the coffee is served — in Italy — with milk, frothed milk, or soy milk, in the afternoon, or the morning, or what. Countless Gemini hours can be spent trying to ascertain what the facts are, what is myth, and what is an author (or two) just having fun at your Gemini expense. As an example? “I’m Gemini so I like a little cream in my morning coffee, and I’ll skip the milk in the afternoon.” That works fine, and your own, Gemini intuition settled the question well enough.


There was “oil pulling,” then there was “apple cider vinegar.” Both of these old-fashioned remedies purported to cure everything wrong with modern people. What caught my attention was the idea that there was ritual involved. In the oil-pulling, as I understand it, it was to rinse one’s mouth with palm oil or coconut oil, or maybe extra-virgin olive oil, I don’t recall, every evening before bedtime. With the vinegar one, it was to have a glass of water mixed with the apple cider vinegar, or tablespoon of the stuff, for something, but in both cases, it was the ritual. Here’s the trick with the idea of health rituals, just like that, it works, they work, because it makes us conscious of what we’re doing. The stuff itself, either vinegar or oil, I doubt that really did much, but thinking about the ritual performed at bedtime each night? That helped. The act of ritual, whatever it is, helps with the health issues. In my mind the act of doing something simple like having a tablespoon of vinegar or rinsing with nut oil, something like that — every night — serves as a way to remind us what we’re trying to achieve. Ritual paves the way for the wellness. And Cancer Moon Child wellness? Big deal right now. Oil Pulling, Vinegar, herbs and spices? Whatever works, practice for the next 30 days and get back to me with the results.

The Leo

What do you do when faced with an immoveable object? Most of the The Fine Leo folks that I know? Most of them will patiently explain to me that it isn’t an obstacle, and we can move it, if we just get a bigger truck. Or a bigger stick. Or an earth mover. Or a bigger piece of something to circumvent that obstacle. Just need a bigger one.

There are some days, some weeks, some period of time, like, right now, wherein the obstacle doesn’t want to be moved — at all. No amount of cajoling, coercion, or brute force will move it. Individually, I’m unsure of the obstacle. But it is fixed, immoveable, and squarely in your path, blocking the The Good Leo’s ingress and egress. Can’t get around it, can’t get through it, can’t go over it. Stop.

There is an obstacle, a problem, a challenge, a fixed and immoveable object blocking your way. Stop.

We got other stuff to work on — this week — so let’s work on that rather than painfully, fruitlessly, tackling an immoveable object that doesn’t want to be moved.

“So, you’re saying, if we can’t fix it, don’t try?”

This week? Exactly what I’m suggesting.



About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person.