Horoscopes starting 11.30.2017

    It’s fit it should be so, for princes are
    A model which heaven makes like to itself.
    As jewels lose their glory if neglected,
    So princes their renowns if not respected.
    ’Tis now your honor, daughter, to entertain
    The labor of each knight in his device.
    Simonides in Shakespeare’s Pericles, Prince of Tyre (2.2.10-5)

Mercury commences a retrograde pattern, almost on top of Saturn, both still in Sagittarius, which is going to add a certain flair for the dramatic to the holiday events. While not bad, it might not be an auspicious time to start anew. See the horoscopes for further details.

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Horoscopes starting 11.30.2017




The catalog was sealed, expensive mailer, and it was addressed to a previous occupant — or current resident — which made the catalog mine. I opened it up. It was that material that borders between professional and DIY home-based operators. Heavy-duty construction gear. I don’t need a drill that will puncture hardened concrete, repeatedly. Only time I ever needed that? I called up a neighbor. Used it for less than minute of run time. Hardly suggest a warranted purchase of an expensive piece of equipment, like that catalog advertised. As I lazily flipped through the pages, the heavy-duty outerwear caught my attention.

Sagittarius: This is what the guys working at the side of the road wear, the guys building the high rises and pouring concrete, hanging sheetrock, serious labor. People who are out-of-doors, in sub-freezing temperatures, for 8 or more hours at a time.

Happy birthday, Sagittarius: That catalog, and the images, then thinking about the material, as Mercury and Saturn spin us one, last time? It’s like that catalog, I live in a place where the days I see freezing weather? I know better than to go outside. Heavy-duty equipment? Not much of a chance I’ll ever really require that. OK to look, just don’t spend too much time dreaming about unrealistic needs.



The Sea Goat

The question, way I heard it, “Is 32 enough for a brown bear?” Hunting buddies. No, I don’t hunt, but I’m not morally opposed to it — this is Texas. However, overhearing just the snippet of conversation, a third buddy joined in, wondering if this was about the age of girlfriend, and if that was OK for a brown bear. He was a younger man, so 32 would’ve been “age appropriate” for him.

The question quickly developed into mirth, as each party recognized the problem with translation, misappropriation, and misguided good nature. The question, kind of moot for around here, was if a 32 caliber firearm was sufficient to halt, bring down a brown bear. I have no way of answering that, and it’s not even a question I’m interested in pursuing. I would suppose it had to do with the size of the bear.

Capricorn: While I was greatly amused, as that conversation spun so far out of control, in less than 30 seconds, as I spun around your planets to gather up an influence, that conversation was stuck in my head. In part, due to the obscurity of the references, and in part, due to the way no one caught what the other was talking about. Capricorn? Careful about building up a story from a completely incorrect understanding of the original intent of the conversation.



The Water Bearer

Over the years, over the course of a lifetime, I’ve had a number of teachers. One trick to always be willing to learn, when a teacher shows up. However, the nature of the way I take in information, process it, and the act of learning, for me, is a more and more convoluted. I pick up a topic, a thread of thought. I pick at it, pull on the thread to unravel the thought, and then I find a point where I might like to dig.

For Aquarius at this time? Conventional horoscope wisdom leans one way. I see a different trend and that follows your discursive, meandering Aquarius thought process as we embark on a new field of study. Maybe that’s not the correct term, “new field of study,“ but other options, like “new course of study” are too heavy-handed.

Instead of trying to control the impulses? When that curiosity gets piqued? You have my permission, even encouragement, to follow that down whatever rabbit hole you like.



The Fishes

In South Texas, where I’m generally located, late December, January, and part of February brings a plague called “Cedar Season.” The hills are alive with an imported brand of mountain cedar and those trees pollinate to populate, and that is like scourge upon the land. Flying into the airport, one year, the pollen was so dense it looked like a brown cloud. Some years, vehicles left outside wind up — over night — with a dusty coating of what turns out to be cedar pollen.

Depends on the years, the rain fall, weather patterns, tree growth patterns, cattle, any number of factors, but it can be quite debilitating. Some OTC antihistamines are useful, and can prove to be very effective. Left over from the old Austin days, I would just start to pop a 3rd Gen. antihistamine tablet with my morning vitamins. Proved to be as an effective measure as any against the pollen problem.

I’ve added a homeopathic element to my Cedar Season medicine cabinet, but I’m still taking those generic 3rd Gen. antihistamines. Time to start the seasonal preparations for that onslaught of cedar season. Or the Xmas holiday crap. One of those, whatever medical measures you take? Pisces, dear? Time to start now, getting ready.



The Ram

If you go back and look over material I’ve written in the past, you’ll find that I was warning you about this. Last couple of weeks, I’ve dropped subtle — and not subtle — hints about what to do. Get prepared. Be ready. Get the house in order. Holidays are madness and this one is compounded by two events, at least. One is the obvious Mercury in Retrograde while the other is less obvious to some, Mars in Libra — with Mars rapidly approaching a point where it opposes Uranus, currently in residence in Aries. I keep a case of bottled water on hand, at least a spare pound of ground coffee, and I have small fire pit in the backyard so I could, if need be, have a fire out there. It’s mostly ceremonial, but still, it could be used, in a pinch, for a real emergency need of fire. I hardly think this is going to be the case, but the idea that I’ve got enough supplies to last few extra days? Very important and, and why I’ve been leading Aries down a particular path — never hurts to be prepared.

Rather than dramatic event, it could be something really simple like an ice storm. “Snowed in” to some signs, and around here, we have bad drivers on a good day so mix in the tiniest fraction of frozen precipitation? Just sucks. Mention ice and cars fishtail into the ditch. So?

So I’m prepared to hole up for two or three days while the ice melts. I’ll be in shorts in no time, again, but that’s why I was just suggesting you stock up on a few essential items.



The Bull

Ever had “State Fair” (brand) corn dogs? I’m not sure that they are really a “state fair” brand of corn dog, but the idea, they can’t sell that without some kind of official affiliation, right?

The last box I had of those sat in the freezer for a good month or two before, cold winter’s night, I realized I was super hungry and just wanted a little something to munch on. Peel out of its packaging, and pop it in the microwave for a minute. Yummy corndog. No mess, no fuss, nothing to clean up later because it has its own stick for serving. Makes it super easy. Convenient.

As we start up with this Mercury in Retrograde week again? Convenient, simple, easy, microwave-safe, and delicious comfort food is required. That brand of corn dog was cheap, and seemed to survive the freezer with equanimity so it’s not a problem. Dig around, see what’s left over that works to help assuage those Taurus (Mercury Retrograde inspired) trama.

“State Fair” corny dogs worked for me. Look at that, “Best used by Dec 2016,” wonder what that means.



The Twins

There was, at one time, a street in Austin that was famous for its Xmas lights. 38 and Half street. “We would start planning in July,” one guy was explaining. I am unsure if it is still a big deal, there, but it was at one time. In San Antonio, there’s one neighborhood that has similar tradition, with carloads of natives visiting from other places just to tour the huge collection of semi-amateur displays that can be quite festive, or just plain, over the top.

All that planning. All that preparation. All that work. Too much for me. If I can’t leave a string of Xmas lights up year-round? I’m not interested.

Gemini: the idea of Xmas lights is too much. Too much work, too much trouble, too much planning, and too much on the electric bill.

Doesn’t mean you can’t — Mercury is in Retrograde opposite from you — doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the fruits of other peoples’ labors.


The Crab - the Moonchild

The Crab

I have a method for “wires management” that I’d like to pass along. Because chargers, jumpers, cables, speaker wires, headphones, adaptors, and every other conceivable wire is part of modern life? An effective way to mange those cables, wires, and spare parts to plug this into that? This is important. I have an old, looks like a small laundry basket. Just two-dollar laundry basket. Into it goes all my wires. Need a power cord for a generations old laptop? I’ve probably got something that will work. Might not be for that brand or model but the prongs line up. Male and female, work together, correctly. Looking for a way to bridge the gap between this accessory and that accessory, or plug a DVD player into a TV? Yes, I’ve got one of those things. A cable signal splitter? Think I’ve got one.

The more complicated the issue, the wiring challenge? The chance is I’ve got a something that will work. Instead of getting all wigged out about this, though, what I do is just toss all the spare cables back in the laundry basket.

To make it through this holiday-flavored Mercury in Retrograde? Consider my method of wire management. Always got something on hand, as need be.

The Leo

The Leo

The Leo

There’s a saying about “No one ever went broke underestimating the American public,” or something like that. I can’t be bothered to find the source of the quote, or the exact wording, but as The Leo, I’m sure you’ll agree, there is no problem with those sentiments. It is a matter of taste. Most Leo taste better than any other sign. I’d say all, but there are always a few exception. However, most Leo are more exceptional than other signs.

There’s a question of style and tastes, and except for one very special Leo who has Mercury Retrograde in her natal chart, the rest of you? Yes, you have better tastes than everyone else. Yes, you taste better than everyone else. No, with the disruptive planetary forces right now? Not a good time to be making a call about taste. I’m not saying it’s always this way, but right now? Get them get cards. Just much easier. Safer, too, as, despite your good tastes? The planets conspire to lead you into an investment that looks good, but only right now. In a few weeks? Not so much.

Typically, I can depends on my Leo friends as taste makers. Maybe not this week, not given the displacement of the planets.



The Virgin

In part, this is because I never understood why there was a “fiscal” year the was different from the commonly accepted 12-month calendar year. As far as my business, and my personal life, the business year and the calendar, my company’s fiscal year, it all ends at the same time. Just makes record keeping a little easier. As I was toying with the Virgo charts, I noticed, with the Mars and Uranus opposition, there this was going to have an oblique impact on the Virgo chart. Take a quick look at where we are, Virgo-wise and where we stand with finances. Trial run before the end of the year. My sales are a little slow at the moment. I know, I’m not really Virgo, but you get the idea, right? A quick, 11-month summation of where you stand in the real works. There’s a few weeks left in the year, and before this Mercury Retrograde, oh crap, it’s already here, but before it sets in? A trial run of what the Virgo year-end might look like. Not a complete summary, or an actual financial document for tax — or business — purposes, but a quick glance, see what we see.

Most likely thing that will pop out of your mouth, and perfect for this time?

“Oh man, I’ve been meaning to fix that!”

Good timing, huh.



The Scales

I keep warning and advising, cajoling and gently correcting, you know. Then this is finally upon us and did you listen? Pay attention? Follow my soft susurrations, and suggestions — this is not the end of the world. Not the end of the Libra world, and not nearly as cataclysmic as it might seem at the time being.

As Mars lines up opposite from Uranus, there’s a sudden whoosh, a giant noise, a sucking sound, or a gust of air, something.

“Nature abhors a vacuum,” and the stars don’t like an apparently empty spot. As a Libra, there’s a lack of balance due to the planets, especially Mars and his not-so-cute buddy, Uranus.

The empty spot, the hole, the spot vacated, and that — as a Libra — you’re trying to fill?

It’s not really empty yet, so you can’t patch it, fill it, or otherwise deal with the stupid issue, just yet. Pause.




Black Friday has come and gone. Christmas Crush is upon us. As a Scorpio, how does this play, next few days? Slow it down. Pause. Stop, think. “This looks like one heckuva deal, think I should get it, now?” Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe wait for a little while, and as we get closer to Xmas, that deal gets slashed in price. Much better deal, then. “But it’s a closeout sale, never this low, ever again!”

Until next week, week after.

Jupiter, in Scorpio, even now, lends an urgency, an expediency, and sense of need. I am Sagittarius, the sign associated with Jupiter, so I know thing or two about the planet’s influences.

Scorpio: Give it a Jupiter-pause. You can thank me, like, maybe in a few days, or a few weeks, even though, you know, you missed my birthday, you rat-bastard. You did that on purpose, right?

Seriously, I was joking. Just pause before you rush headlong into something that might be better advised to wait on. Yes, I know, holidays and insanity and all. Not worth the fight.

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About the author: Born and raised in a small town in East Texas, Kramer Wetzel spent years honing his craft in a trailer park in South Austin. He hates writing about himself in third person. More at KramerWetzel.com.

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